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  • Cosette
    Cosette Member Posts: 612 ✭
    edited July 2016

    Hi Vinn2016. I'm sorry that you're having a rough time with your husband.

    I'm concerned about what I'm hearing regarding his behaviour. It's normal for a partner to struggle with knowing how to support someone with breast cancer. We have a booklet on this topic that you can order or download. But that's no excuse for forcing  you to go out, insulting you, or making you feel humiliated. As the others have said, this is abusive behaviour and it's not ok.

    I encourage you to seek support from family and friends as well as professional help. You can talk to your doctor. You can also contact Relationships Australia via the web or call them at 1300 367 277. For crisis support, you can call LifeLine on 13 11 44.

    For your husband, MensLine Australia is a professional telephone and online support and information service that is available 24/7 at 1300 78 99 78.

     And if you find yourself in immediate danger, please call 000.

  • Vinn2016
    Vinn2016 Member Posts: 72 ✭
    edited July 2016

    thank you so much guys for all your advice and support, in the end I am the only one that can sort this mess out. I am hanging in there. I just don't have the strength to fight him at the moment. My way of coping is to stay out of his way, that works. I go on my lap top and just shut him out. I also go to bed and watch my favourite TV shows like Dexter for the millionth time, not sure what it is about Dexter but I love it. MMM maybe I am sure what I love about Dexter. LOL

    The good thing is I am over my chemo treatment. I'm having another operation in 2.5 weeks time and then start Radiation Therapy after that.

    I am hoping to start back at gym next week as that helps me heaps to focus and get my thoughts back on track.

    It's really funny last nite he was being so caring and taking my temp for me as I was not feeling the best and did end up not  going back to work that evening.

    I swear it would be easier to deal with if he was nasty 24/7 at least I would know where I stood all the time. But this one minute nice and one minute nasty is the hardest to handle.

    Unfortunately I don't have family that are able to help, my parents are old and don't live close by as for my siblings they haven't even acknowledged that I have cancer which is upsetting.

    All my friends and work colleagues say I they can't believe how strong I am and how much I am doing while going through this, working, exercising, looking after the family still.

     

     

  • jd48
    jd48 Member Posts: 484 ✭
    edited July 2016

    Hang in there and we are here any time you need us - in private messages or in the forume here ????????

    Hugs

    Jel.

     

  • Vinn2016
    Vinn2016 Member Posts: 72 ✭
    edited July 2016

    thanks, not sure what private messages is?

     

  • Debza
    Debza Member Posts: 27 ✭
    edited July 2016

    Vinn 2016 I am so saddened the abuse you are going through like others dont know how it was before but there is no excuse for his behaviour.I don't believe this about the cancer it's abt his control and feeling helpless around you.We don't know how everyone reacts to the diagnosis,but,please keep the counselling up All the best with the op and radio please keep us updated for your sanity and we all care how you are going :-)

  • jd48
    jd48 Member Posts: 484 ✭
    edited July 2016

    If you want to mesaage any members directly that message stay visible just to them and yourself so if you ever wanted to chat with anyone more privatelly (not in the forum) remember we are here and you have that option open to you as well ??

    Jel

  • iserbrown
    iserbrown Member Posts: 5,764 ✭
    edited July 2016

    Hi - if you want to message anyone in this message click on their name and it will take you to their profile - on the left is a button that says Connect and another that says Message - click on message and away you go - it will come up in your own Messages

     

    Hope that's clear and good luck with your counselling

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