FEC You!

Chris P

So what can I say about my first experience of FEC ? Oh yes it sucks! I wasn't sick which was good, I did however feel like I'd been hit by a bus. I had some discomfort in my stomach, my Knees and other joints felt painful and I felt nauseous. I found it difficult to walk my feet were numb and When I wasn't bitching and harbouring thoughts if revenge on my poor medical team that involved laxatives in their coffee ( Oh did I forget to say I was irrational and grumpy as hell too) I was sleeping. Reading this back to myself I think I'm a wimp cos that all doesn't sound too bad. At the time though I felt like I was trapped in my own living hell. I felt really depressed and weepy, I wanted to eat, or did I? Hmmm no don't fancy anything, oh yes I do but it tastes like I've cleaned the loo with my tongue. All I could think was I'm not doing this again. 16 weeks of NAB, where the effects were really liveable and mild, the hitchhiker has shrunk, why do I need 4 treatments of this crap too! I had the chemo on the Monday and I'd taken the whole week off work because I wasn't sure how bad the effects would be. By Friday I started to feel better. Well I did and then I didn't, I honestly could not envisage me ever feeling normal again, Sunday and I still wasn't right. Yet Monday I woke up feeling good, I didn't feel like an old person, I felt lighter ( if that makes sense?) I went back to work Tuesday and it's been fine, I've got through it. I do feel normal again and I'm thinking maybe I can do it .again. I was speaking to a friend at work and she told me that when she was going through chemo, she felt the same, she would cry before each session, dreading it, wanting to give but knowing that she would be another step nearer to the end if she just did it. So for anyone reading this that's about to start FEC, please don't freak out, this is how I felt, a lot of people do ok and I am ok now, I got through it and I know what to expect. I can't say that I ate healthily that week, it was a case of if I want to eat that I will and thumb my nose at those healthy eating tips. I looked on it as anything was better than nothing and something I enjoyed and could taste was super better! So I'm back again for chemo on the 17 th, I've got over my dummy spit, and to all those out there doing hours of this crap over months and years I take my hat off to you, you're all bloody heros! Xx