The Twins
Chris P
Member Posts: 80 ✭
Posted by Chris September 29, 2013 - #Feelings - 39 views
So as I wrote in my earlier entry I was diagnosed on Wednesday with bc. I'm 44 years old, originally from Scotland but have been in sunny WA with my family for the last 6 years. I have to say that since diagnosis I've been looking at the "twins" differently. When I was younger I was quite proud of them, they came in useful when in the pub and trying to get through a sea of rugby supporters to the bar , with the twins help the sea parted like Moses escaping from Egypt. They also came in useful as somewhere t o stick that extra drink if my hands were full. Now I found myself in a dilemma, I had a good twin and a bad twin! I couldn't even look at the right hand twin. When I did I was giving it the sort of look usually reserved for some who'd been caught farting whilst shaking the queens hand! Knowing that there was this "thing" inside it, hitching a ride. I'm getting better with that though, I think acceptance is part of it....that and the pretty impressive bruising after the ultra sound and biopsy ( I keep whacking it out to show people, I've never had a blue boob before). I read somewhere about using visualisation and positive thinking techniques, I tried to think of the hitchhiker in my body in various ways ( a bunch of mouldy grapes, a big pile of sand) I've now settled on imagining it as a very snooty female ( a bit like those women on Real Housewives of Beverley Hills, they all pretend to be friends whilst bitching and stabbing each other in the back, not that I watch it often but it is like watching a train wreck , you just can't look away). So I imagine myself in a room with the "hitchhiker" who I've decided to call Lou Ann and I go up to Lou Ann and right in front of her face, smile at her and give her the bird for being such a bitch! Hey don't judge me .....it's whatever works!
So as I wrote in my earlier entry I was diagnosed on Wednesday with bc. I'm 44 years old, originally from Scotland but have been in sunny WA with my family for the last 6 years. I have to say that since diagnosis I've been looking at the "twins" differently. When I was younger I was quite proud of them, they came in useful when in the pub and trying to get through a sea of rugby supporters to the bar , with the twins help the sea parted like Moses escaping from Egypt. They also came in useful as somewhere t o stick that extra drink if my hands were full. Now I found myself in a dilemma, I had a good twin and a bad twin! I couldn't even look at the right hand twin. When I did I was giving it the sort of look usually reserved for some who'd been caught farting whilst shaking the queens hand! Knowing that there was this "thing" inside it, hitching a ride. I'm getting better with that though, I think acceptance is part of it....that and the pretty impressive bruising after the ultra sound and biopsy ( I keep whacking it out to show people, I've never had a blue boob before). I read somewhere about using visualisation and positive thinking techniques, I tried to think of the hitchhiker in my body in various ways ( a bunch of mouldy grapes, a big pile of sand) I've now settled on imagining it as a very snooty female ( a bit like those women on Real Housewives of Beverley Hills, they all pretend to be friends whilst bitching and stabbing each other in the back, not that I watch it often but it is like watching a train wreck , you just can't look away). So I imagine myself in a room with the "hitchhiker" who I've decided to call Lou Ann and I go up to Lou Ann and right in front of her face, smile at her and give her the bird for being such a bitch! Hey don't judge me .....it's whatever works!
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