A Strange day. today
Hi ladies, woke up ok today, didn't take long for me to feel tired again:( Feeling just a little lost, nothing is holding my attention for very long. Hot day in Brissie, tried reading, tv, cooked a banana loaf, i think i'm missing work. I used to work on weekends and liked it, just strange. I'm trying the 'one day at a time' , just a bit mopey. I know, at least, i hope, it will pass. Have to stop thinking what was and focus on what is. I will log back on when i am much cheerier. Sorry for being whiney:(
Hazel xx
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Hi hazel
I'm sharing your lost feeling today. We both had our 1st chemo on Tuesday and I started feeling crap yest and more so today. I do feel strange and a little lost! Not sure if it is the chemo - tears today couldn't stop. Feel like I have a bad hang over plus cement in my knees. Made myself go for walk with dog and it was an effort but felt important to do.
Crashed on couch now - not sure what to eat or drink to make me feel better. Any ideas ladies??
Hoping feel brighter tmrow ..
Karen
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I'm already worrying about days like this...I have started writing lists of things that I have always put off due to being too busy - I figure that now I'm not working (contract ended) and I will soon be spending a lot of time at home, I will need to have things to do to keep myself from going insane.
A couple of things on my list:
1. Tackle the dreaded sewing / mending pile one button & hem at a time!
2. Clean up the photos and files on the computer
3. Finish off some of my varied and many half-started craft projects
4. Write a letter to my nan
5. Finally make a start on the jigsaw puzzle that was given to me 4 years ago!
etc. etc.
I'm trying to keep it to the things that don't require much physical efffort, and if it all gets too much, I can just stop doing whatever it is & return to it later. I know that I will feel a small sense of accomplishment every time I can cross something off the list. I hope my theory works!
In regards to what to eat or drink, once again, I'm not actually there yet, but I have had a suggestion from a friend who had chemo (not for breast cancer though) - she found that drinking lots of water with fresh lemon juice in it made her bad days just "a bit under the weather" instead of "crap, horrible, shit, pain and all things bad"...she said someone put her onto it after the 2nd or 3rd treatment, & it made all the difference. I'm not sure if that will help me, but I like lemon juice and know I need to drink more water, so why not give it a go? Maybe it will help, and it will certainly be refreshing in these upcoming summer months!
Best of luck with it, hopefully you find something that helps you :-)
From Bobbie
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I'm already worrying about days like this...I have started writing lists of things that I have always put off due to being too busy - I figure that now I'm not working (contract ended) and I will soon be spending a lot of time at home, I will need to have things to do to keep myself from going insane.
A couple of things on my list:
1. Tackle the dreaded sewing / mending pile one button & hem at a time!
2. Clean up the photos and files on the computer
3. Finish off some of my varied and many half-started craft projects
4. Write a letter to my nan
5. Finally make a start on the jigsaw puzzle that was given to me 4 years ago!
etc. etc.
I'm trying to keep it to the things that don't require much physical efffort, and if it all gets too much, I can just stop doing whatever it is & return to it later. I know that I will feel a small sense of accomplishment every time I can cross something off the list. I hope my theory works!
In regards to what to eat or drink, once again, I'm not actually there yet, but I have had a suggestion from a friend who had chemo (not for breast cancer though) - she found that drinking lots of water with fresh lemon juice in it made her bad days just "a bit under the weather" instead of "crap, horrible, shit, pain and all things bad"...she said someone put her onto it after the 2nd or 3rd treatment, & it made all the difference. I'm not sure if that will help me, but I like lemon juice and know I need to drink more water, so why not give it a go? Maybe it will help, and it will certainly be refreshing in these upcoming summer months!
Best of luck with it, hopefully you find something that helps you :-)
From Bobbie
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Hi Hazel & Bobbie,
I remember those crappy days feeling listless and lost. Apart from the side effects which are starting to kick in, I also think the body may be coming down after all that tense and stressful 'waiting' for chemo to begin, holding yourself together (or trying) and then being all of a sudden released. You finally let yourself go and you fall in a heap. Give yourself permission to 'fall apart' though, your not superhuman. It is a bumpy ride from here on in. You'll have ups and you will definitely have downs. This is the roller coaster part that really lives up to its name. You'll be lost and down and feeling low and then you'll start to lift up again in time for your next chemo. But it is all doable ladies. Before you know it you'll be on the other side telling others that follow to hang in there.
Bobbie, it's a great idea to make lists and have goals. Just don't expect to achieve them all. This is the time for you to nurture yourselves. It's okay if you don't do anything but watch TV all-be-it numbly. Try and get some exercise in but don't beat yourself up if you don't feel able.
Remember that you bodies are under seige right now. So be kind to yourselves and let others take care of you.
There's a song "My mamma told me there'd be days like this". Yes there are!
Sending you both bug hugs.
Love Janey xxx
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Hey Janey, I have picked myself up a bit, did a few little jobs around the house, tried to occupy myself. There are going to be more days like this, so i will come up with some things to do. I have been feeling sorry for my partner, having to do more, not that he's complaining, it's just a life change. Thanks for the hugs,
Hazel xx
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I've picked up again, thanks for the advice. You seem to epitomise what this site is all about, support. I did find a few odd jobs to do, rang my brother, just occupied myself. Funny, hey? Never seem to have the time to do things when you are working, now i'm not, don't have the energy to them:) It certainly is a journey, one step at a time.
Hazel xxx
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Certainly was weird day, Karen. I have picked myself up a bit, helped by the cooler weather where i am. Pottered around, might relax with a movie now, tomorrow is another day. Going to have mango and ice-cream, not exactly health food, but i'm looking forward to it:) Maybe we will find ourselves having these similar days, at least we are not alone. Take care and hope you are feeling better tomorrow.
Hazel xx
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Hi bobbie, it was one of those days to forget, i sort of knew i would have these days, just wasn't quite prepared for it. But then again, wasn't expecting the whole journey to happen. Now it has, we will all make our way to the finish, with the help of this network, it will be a lot easier. I'm going to try some lemon in my water, thanks for that. I sort of created a list of things to do late this arvo, will try when days like this happen, just won't pressure myself, take my time. All the best with your treatment, take care,
Hazel xxx
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Hey Robyn, i certainly didn't know what to expect with this treatment, so it's good to have someone say 'that's normal'. It was a feeling yesterday that i was quite useless. When you're feeling ok, you think, what should i be doing? I will take each day as it comes, be a bit more accepting. Thanks again for your advice,
Hazel xxx
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