Working during treatment
Tanya
Comments
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Welcome to BCNA, although for your sake, I wish you did not need to be here!
As you say everyone is different and many people do manage to work through Chemo, if you have to have it. It is very hard at the beginning of this journey to stop yourself from worrying about how everything is going work out. There is so much you do not know and you maybe worrying about things you do not need to.
Try to take it one step at a time. There will be a lot of waiting in the beginng, waiting for appointments and waiting for results. It is hard to make plans until you have your treatment plan.
There is nothing you can achieve by trying to get too far ahead of yourself with worrying about what may or may not be going to happen. Your family need and will want you to do what you have to to get well again. That needs to be everyone's priority and everything else will work itself out as you go along. You will find support from many people on here to help with individual issues as they arise. 9 times out of 10 someone else will have faced a similar situation.
For now, just keep busy and don't think too far ahead. Deal with each step as it comes and as you find out more. It may not be too bad and you might be wasting energy on issues that never happen. Be gentle on yourself and you will find a way through this.
I hope that it helps to know that you can find support here and that others have been through this and are now well and living full lives again. This is just a detour that you need to slow down for and you will get back on the highway when it is safe to do so.
Wishing you lots of luck and please look after yourself.
When you know a bit more, we will be here to answer your questions and support you in any way we can.
Deanne xxoo0 -
Welcome to BCNA, although for your sake, I wish you did not need to be here!
As you say everyone is different and many people do manage to work through Chemo, if you have to have it. It is very hard at the beginning of this journey to stop yourself from worrying about how everything is going work out. There is so much you do not know and you maybe worrying about things you do not need to.
Try to take it one step at a time. There will be a lot of waiting in the beginng, waiting for appointments and waiting for results. It is hard to make plans until you have your treatment plan.
There is nothing you can achieve by trying to get too far ahead of yourself with worrying about what may or may not be going to happen. Your family need and will want you to do what you have to to get well again. That needs to be everyone's priority and everything else will work itself out as you go along. You will find support from many people on here to help with individual issues as they arise. 9 times out of 10 someone else will have faced a similar situation.
For now, just keep busy and don't think too far ahead. Deal with each step as it comes and as you find out more. It may not be too bad and you might be wasting energy on issues that never happen. Be gentle on yourself and you will find a way through this.
I hope that it helps to know that you can find support here and that others have been through this and are now well and living full lives again. This is just a detour that you need to slow down for and you will get back on the highway when it is safe to do so.
Wishing you lots of luck and please look after yourself.
When you know a bit more, we will be here to answer your questions and support you in any way we can.
Deanne xxoo0 -
Wow you've got a lot going on! Full time work, four kids, BC treatment coming up and a wedding! Not surprised you're feeling exhausted. So sorry to hear about your diagnosis. It must be quite strange and emotionally draining dealing with the stress and fear surrounding BC at the same time as planning a happy event like wedding (even if its' a low key event).
I have three kids myself, work part-time from home and had four rounds of chemo over three months last year. From my experience - and you're right everyone is different - you won't be able to work on the days you receive your chemo. It is quite time consuming and then I always felt a bit wrung out afterwards. The next two days after that I felt ok but but by the end of the second day I was starting to feel pretty bad - achey, exhausted, slightly nauseous (and various other symptoms).
Days 3 & 4 were always the worst. I couldn't do much on those days and spent most of the time in bed or just slowly pottering around the house doing essential chores. By day 5 I was starting to improve and could get up and about again, although I was still not feeling great. Then I gradually improved again until the next cycle.
So I would say you would have to plan at least 3-4 days in each chemo cycle where you probably won't be up to working. But even though I felt better during some of it, I never felt completely well. There was a continual lethargy that got a little bit worse with each cycle. You can get things done though and working from home should make it a bit easier.
Having said all that, try not to put too much pressure on yourself to hold everything together. Chemo is tough and you will be going through a hard time both physically and emotionally. Accept whatever help is offered from family and friends. Delegate responsibilities where you can and only do what is essential. Don't worry if the house gets messy. You have to put yourself first at this time.
The very best of luck to you Tanya. I hope it all goes as smoothly as possible. And good luck with your wedding too. Take care. Janet.
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Thanks Deanne and Janet for getting back to me. I'm trying to just relax and not think about anything but the wedding at the moment. I have been planning this wedding for 9 months now and it just seems so unfair that 2.5 weeks out from it this happens. Some of the thoughts I have are stupid and childish, I know. Like if only I hadn't found the lump till after the wedding and cruise I could still be blissfully ignorant....but realistically I know that the earlier the better is how I should be thinking. The lump is currently estimated on ultrasound and mammogram as 2.5 to 3cm with a smaller 1.5cm lump partially attached to it. Probably best I didn't wait but it doesn't change the fact that I still feel like a child stamping my foot and yelling "this is not fair". I get scared so much but cover it with jokes, my 3 children 20, 13, 11 from my previous marriage have already had to go through losing their dad to a car accident 4 years ago and now I think they r worried about what will happen to me. I've tried to assure them that the odds are well in my favour and bc is not a death sentence. I guess it's normal to think "why me" " what did I do wrong". I think it will be better once I have the surgery and know exactly what I'm dealing with, they say patience is a virtue, but I'm not feeling very patient these days lol.
Thanks for letting me rant...Tanya0 -
Thanks Deanne and Janet for getting back to me. I'm trying to just relax and not think about anything but the wedding at the moment. I have been planning this wedding for 9 months now and it just seems so unfair that 2.5 weeks out from it this happens. Some of the thoughts I have are stupid and childish, I know. Like if only I hadn't found the lump till after the wedding and cruise I could still be blissfully ignorant....but realistically I know that the earlier the better is how I should be thinking. The lump is currently estimated on ultrasound and mammogram as 2.5 to 3cm with a smaller 1.5cm lump partially attached to it. Probably best I didn't wait but it doesn't change the fact that I still feel like a child stamping my foot and yelling "this is not fair". I get scared so much but cover it with jokes, my 3 children 20, 13, 11 from my previous marriage have already had to go through losing their dad to a car accident 4 years ago and now I think they r worried about what will happen to me. I've tried to assure them that the odds are well in my favour and bc is not a death sentence. I guess it's normal to think "why me" " what did I do wrong". I think it will be better once I have the surgery and know exactly what I'm dealing with, they say patience is a virtue, but I'm not feeling very patient these days lol.
Thanks for letting me rant...Tanya0 -
There is never a good time to go through this but it is such a shame with the timing for you!
I hope you can manage to still enjoy some of the wonderful events you have spent so long planning.
I am not a patient person either but unfortunately so much about breast cancer is beyond our control. It does force you to rethink things though and family and friends will want to help, so accept that help.
My heart goes out to you reading your post and I hope that everything goes as well as it can in the next few weeks for you and your family.
You can rant here as much as you like. Cancer is scarey and it is so unfair that you are having this happen when life should have been so good!
Deanne xx
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Hi Tanya, I has invasive lobular also my diagnosis was July 2012' before I found the lump I was excessively tired in bed at 8 some nights , went to drs bloods done but all good, then on hols I found the lump but didnt let on as i didnt want the holiday ruined! Surgeon said let me know how you feel later about the tiredness, well for me no chemo post pathology results but had radiation for 30sessions. I had 1month of work post surgery as mine was high in the breast and under arm making movement difficult and I had severe cording (like a pulled muscle) I had lymph node removal also. I had radio each morning and drove to work because of my sheer stubborn streak but honestly was only tired the last week. Ive had quite a few issues post radio as far as lymphodema goes.I'm now on tamoxifen and yes I'm tired but its different its more I don't want to sleep rather than I want to sit more. I still find it hard to not be as whirlwind as i was lwish I'd been a bit kinder to myself as far as taking time of work, and at home but that's my personality I won't give in. Maybe that's good maybe not. We do what we think is right at the time and its no good to regret later, hope that's a help. Regards adean0
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Hi Tanya,
I work from home too. I'm an accountant and both of my diagnoses have come right at the start of my busiest period!! Always the way, isn't it?! Anyway, I did manage to work through my chemo. It wasn't always easy and I didn't always feel that great but I did it. I would have my chemo on a Wednesday and then take the rest of the week off, including the weekend. By the Monday I was fine to be working. I was definitely more tired than normal though so you have to be careful not to overdo it. I only have 2 children and that's busy enough so not sure how you will go with coping with everything and 4 kids!
Good luck and make sure that you take some time out for you. I know its hard when you don't get paid if you don't work but you need to be well again for your family and yourself.
Louise x
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Just wanted to say thanks to everyone for responding.0
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I also wanted to thank all the loving,caring ladies who tell it like it is and help people in need with valuable information. Thanks.
You mean the world to others, when they reach out and need some guidance.
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Hi Tanya
I think working is good for your mind when you can do it.
If you get too tired/sick then stop for a bit. I find personally it lifts me and makes me feel like I am living a normal life rather then just Dr,s appointments, blood tests, scans etc.
Everyone handles things differently but I am sure you will find what suits you and your family the best.
Good luck to you, what state are you in ?
Cheers, Rubes0 -
Hi Tanya
I think working is good for your mind when you can do it.
If you get too tired/sick then stop for a bit. I find personally it lifts me and makes me feel like I am living a normal life rather then just Dr,s appointments, blood tests, scans etc.
Everyone handles things differently but I am sure you will find what suits you and your family the best.
Good luck to you, what state are you in ?
Cheers, Rubes0 -
Hi Rubes,
I'm in brisbane qld. Off to meet the specialist for the first time today. Finally I will get some information and find out when I will be having surgery. That is the bit I find a struggle at the moment, it's like my life is in limbo, not knowing when anything is going to happen and what. I will admit it, I'm a control freak lol, but I'm learning. Maybe once I meet with the specialist today and know when surgery is I can get a full nights proper sleep, because since I found out about the bc I am not sleeping properly and buggered by 2.00pm each day...thank god I work at home so no driving once I finish work.0 -
Hi Tanya
Hope you get a few more answers from surgeon today. Have you had needle biopsy yet? This will tell you and your surgeon a lot more about what you are dealing with too. You are going through the worst part of the journey at the moment. Once you know what treatment you need it does get easier and you do feel more in control. Even though you are feeling tired at this stage, I found exercise (just walking) helpful. It helped me to feel that I was doing something positive to help myself when everything else seemed beyond my control. It also helped me to sleep a little better. Keeping busy, which you are doing, is also helpful to help the waiting time to pass more quickly.
Sharing the burden on line and with loved ones can help too.
Try to keep positive and take care of yourself.
Thinking of you.
Deanne xx
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Hi Tanya
Hope you get a few more answers from surgeon today. Have you had needle biopsy yet? This will tell you and your surgeon a lot more about what you are dealing with too. You are going through the worst part of the journey at the moment. Once you know what treatment you need it does get easier and you do feel more in control. Even though you are feeling tired at this stage, I found exercise (just walking) helpful. It helped me to feel that I was doing something positive to help myself when everything else seemed beyond my control. It also helped me to sleep a little better. Keeping busy, which you are doing, is also helpful to help the waiting time to pass more quickly.
Sharing the burden on line and with loved ones can help too.
Try to keep positive and take care of yourself.
Thinking of you.
Deanne xx
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