Encouragement and control of fear
PANIC, FEAR, CONTROL, FEAR, SURVIVAL
I am noticing some common links to all the women who speak openly on BCNA. It doesnt involve what Cancer type, what style of treatment, or how many children you have. The common link are our emotions. Their Ebb and Flow, and ultimately how we control our fear and regain strength to endure - to regain happiness in our lives.
We all panic to start with, scramble for understanding, ask questions, learn and recover our control.
Fear is only an emotion with a bad result attached.
Mastering control of fear is an art form we are all now learning to achieve.
Relaxing music, painting, fresh air, exercise, walking, and deep breaths followed by "Live in the here and now" calm my mind.
At times we all feel like we are in a car without brakes, driving downhill, but the faster you take control of your fear, the sooner you will relax, and great are the results.
I currently am just over another bout of Fear, now back in control, I have found a better place.
Today, I am ok.
Love to those who relate to this.
xx Bel
Comments
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So deep and meaningful and so well put my Bella. Fear is the root of all evil and if we can control that we have won a huge battle. It is a real hard one to win but many of us BC sisters have won that battle many times over and come out the other side a better and stronger person for it.
Lots of love always, Mich xoxoxo
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Great post Bel. I'm going to try some of your tips. I guess the further we come in our journy the better we are able to learn how to cope. I know after my surgery I was in a really good head space, I had a handle on everything that was happening to me and understood the road a head. Then Chemo started. Now I have to start all over again. I know once chemo is over and the feeling so awful has lessen or gone I'm sure I'll get back to the head space I was in after my surgery. It's great all the advice that is on here.Vanessa x0
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Great post Bel. I'm going to try some of your tips. I guess the further we come in our journy the better we are able to learn how to cope. I know after my surgery I was in a really good head space, I had a handle on everything that was happening to me and understood the road a head. Then Chemo started. Now I have to start all over again. I know once chemo is over and the feeling so awful has lessen or gone I'm sure I'll get back to the head space I was in after my surgery. It's great all the advice that is on here.Vanessa x0
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Great words,great insight! I think the "unknown"causes great fear but once we have an answer(whether good or bad)we can usually get our head around it. If fear or stress creeps up on me I allow myself 48hrs to either solve it or shelve it! I then use distraction/relaxation to forget about it.I often find that my "shelved problems/fears"sort themselves out.
Tonya xx
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Great words,great insight! I think the "unknown"causes great fear but once we have an answer(whether good or bad)we can usually get our head around it. If fear or stress creeps up on me I allow myself 48hrs to either solve it or shelve it! I then use distraction/relaxation to forget about it.I often find that my "shelved problems/fears"sort themselves out.
Tonya xx
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Well said, I can relate, and some good tips to help keep fear under control.
Kathy.
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Tears came to my eyes (yep again), sigh, when I got to the last words I read from all the lovely ladies who responded. From now on Shirl, I am going to steal your Mums mantra "Dont look over your shoulder at where you have been, look ahead to where you are going" brilliantly put. Reading everyones comments always gives me a lift ! Thank you again. Love Bel
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Love you girls. XLeonie (PS I am off for my mammo and u/s tomorrow - I needed these words)
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Lovely post ShirlO,
I recommend anyone on here, to read it. It really is a physical and emotional journey.God luck, Kathy. OX
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Lovely post ShirlO,
I recommend anyone on here, to read it. It really is a physical and emotional journey.God luck, Kathy. OX
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Hi Bel...
A wonderful post, just at the right time. Thank you. As soon as I start to feel the old anxiety return, I head for this site. I'm starting the 'waiting game' again. Bone scans, cat scan scheduled for next week (suspected mets) then I have to wait another week until our shared oncologist can see me. Aahhhh!!!! Jo
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I always enjoy your posts and this is no exception the responses are also very inspiring.
I have more surgery coming up next week and am starting to feel the gitters, silly really I know but still its there.
My doctors always say, your a strong woman you cope very well, but they aren't with me at night when my mind is going crazy.
For me I concentrate on the things in life that bring me the most joy, my family and friends. I have been spending so much time with my children and grandchildren they must be gettign sick of me. Miss Career Woman has seemed to float out the window, work just doesn't seem that important any more. I do however look forward to the day normality returns and I can go back to work, I can go for a night out and spend a day shopping with my friends.
Have a lovely weekend.
Donna
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I always enjoy your posts and this is no exception the responses are also very inspiring.
I have more surgery coming up next week and am starting to feel the gitters, silly really I know but still its there.
My doctors always say, your a strong woman you cope very well, but they aren't with me at night when my mind is going crazy.
For me I concentrate on the things in life that bring me the most joy, my family and friends. I have been spending so much time with my children and grandchildren they must be gettign sick of me. Miss Career Woman has seemed to float out the window, work just doesn't seem that important any more. I do however look forward to the day normality returns and I can go back to work, I can go for a night out and spend a day shopping with my friends.
Have a lovely weekend.
Donna
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Thank you for your honesty about how youre feeling leading up to surgery is a tricky time. Our damn minds seem to talk constantly dont they, and trying to think of other topics is a real challenge. What is worth a try is getting into some deep breathing exercises and just think about quieting the mind. Its easier said than done, The only things that switch my mind off the constant thinking are reading, and watching light stuff on the TV. The reading is easier in the middle of the night (husband is still in spare room), by switching on the light reading, it helps me. I have noticed when Im really having trouble sleeping I need to read the same page over 10 times, its a give away Im stressing! Most options make too much noise, like boiling the kettle to make Camomile Tea, but they say it is best not to get onto the computer, as it wakes you up further, so have a note pad and pen by the bed and write down what you are thinking, that helps me too. Please know we are all thinking of you next week during surgery, sending out the prayers, and wishing you well. Big hug, Bel xx
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Thank you for your honesty about how youre feeling leading up to surgery is a tricky time. Our damn minds seem to talk constantly dont they, and trying to think of other topics is a real challenge. What is worth a try is getting into some deep breathing exercises and just think about quieting the mind. Its easier said than done, The only things that switch my mind off the constant thinking are reading, and watching light stuff on the TV. The reading is easier in the middle of the night (husband is still in spare room), by switching on the light reading, it helps me. I have noticed when Im really having trouble sleeping I need to read the same page over 10 times, its a give away Im stressing! Most options make too much noise, like boiling the kettle to make Camomile Tea, but they say it is best not to get onto the computer, as it wakes you up further, so have a note pad and pen by the bed and write down what you are thinking, that helps me too. Please know we are all thinking of you next week during surgery, sending out the prayers, and wishing you well. Big hug, Bel xx
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