This morning I awoke to my mobile phone alarm, playing an upbeat tune with the words "Happy Halloween..3 years cancer-free..congratulations!" flashing on the screen.
Today I was diagnosed with early breast cancer 3 years ago. Little did I know on that day that I'd be facing a second diagnosis, almost to the exact day 3 years later. Our annual Halloween party went ahead on Saturday night, not celebrating being cancer-free (as was the tradition), but celebrating life...still being here and going strong.
Back in 2008, when I received the news and my daughter was only 10 years old, I remember thinking "just let me see her into high school at the very least". She starts high school in 2012, so I have (hopefully) achieved that goal!
How do you live well with a secondary diagnosis? How can you make plans? set goals?...I just don't know. How can you push fear into the back seat, even just for a little while so that you can get on with living?...I just don't know. I hope in time I can come to terms with this diagnosis...find some sort of peace, learn to dance in the rain and get on with living. Tomorrow is a big day, so perhaps with some answers I'll be able to get out of this 'limbo' state and move forward.
So congratulations to me (and my daughter) on this special day...I have survived cancer for 3 years now! It has raised its ugly head again, very unexpectedly, but I hope and pray that I can beat it one more time! xx