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Scared stiff

Glynnis
Glynnis Member Posts: 360 ✭
in Metastatic breast cancer
hi everyone, well reality is hitting, had my stent put in yesterday from kidney to bladder, all went well, yes I have what they called a “mass” in there so that’s my second port of call to find out what that is then we can see what’s in my bones, I’m really starting to get very scared and worried now I have me too deal with and my 26 year old son we had testicular cancer who we thought was clear has had a blood test result where his markers have gone up from 10-13 so he has to have a pet scan now to see what’s going on then possibly removal of his lymph nodes in his stomach massive op. Whdnwill we get a break from this hideous disease wish some would come along wave s wand and it would all be gone for everyone. F... F.... F.... ☹️☹️☹️
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Comments

  • Sister
    Sister Member Posts: 4,961 ✭
    Fuck!, indeed @glynnis.  I am so sorry to hear what you and your family are going through.  
  • iserbrown
    iserbrown Member Posts: 5,781 ✭
    Keeping you in my thoughts!
    I assume the stent is to keep a duct open
    It's a little rough for you and your son.  
    Take care 
  • Glynnis
    Glynnis Member Posts: 360 ✭
    @iserbrown apparently my kidney is pretty well gone it was only working at 17% because of the blockage which is not cancer that much we know,  none of which I knew no pain symptoms etc with it so the stent will stop it getting any worse, I think today is that day where everything is hitting Home I appreciate being able to come on here and say how I feel and your and everyone’s comments 
  • iserbrown
    iserbrown Member Posts: 5,781 ✭

    Gee that adds to the shock value when you had no indication that the kidney was in trouble 
    Thank goodness your team is diligent. 
    Giovanna has mentioned you in the update
    Best wishes 
    Sending you a virtual hug x

  • Glynnis
    Glynnis Member Posts: 360 ✭
    @Sister Thankyou I’m just having that down day today, everything hitting at once 😢😢 but I’m going to start thinking about happy thoughts again then I’ll be fine can’t change what has happened have to deal with it and that’s what I’m going to do 
  • Hendrix
    Hendrix Member Posts: 324 ✭
    Thinking of you @Glynnis 🙏🏻🙏🏻
  • Glynnis
    Glynnis Member Posts: 360 ✭
    @iserbrown I should have said the kidney itself does not have any cancer in it but the mass could very well be cancer
  • kmakm
    kmakm Member Posts: 7,974 ✭
    One step at a time, one hour, one day. Let the rants fly. I've got no answer, the shit piles up and that seems to be life. Take a deep breath, refocus, and try not to cross bridges until you come to them. Apart from a good vent here, what are your coping mechanisms? Big hug, K xox
  • Glynnis
    Glynnis Member Posts: 360 ✭
    @kmakm good advice, coping mechanisms don’t really have any so any suggestions are really welcome. I do have a “women’s cave” which I love to go in and do my sewing crafting etc I can tune off to what’s going on so might spend sometime in thrrr today 
  • kmakm
    kmakm Member Posts: 7,974 ✭
    That is mindfulness 101! I would book yourself into the cave for at least an hour a day. No ifs ands or buts. Not negotiable and make sure everyone knows it.

    What else do you like to do?
  • Zoffiel
    Zoffiel Member Posts: 3,374 ✭
    I don't think it's reasonable to expect yourself to cope @Glynnis You've been told you have metastatic cancer,  how the hell does one 'cope' with that? It's a bloody nightmare and more power to you that you are even trying to rationalise it.

    I think we learn early how to deal with distress in our personal way. Me, I either have a massive tanty then get ice cold clinical or do the clinical first and the tantrum later. Can't get through any of life's disasters without employing both tactics. I just wish I could either drop the tantrum or better deploy it. I'm trying; rather than salvaging something with a heartbeat or pointlesslly thrashing around yelling, I try to channel that energy into beating up my wood pile. That 'personal growth' is a work in process.
    I'm so sorry this has happened. Mxx

  • Glynnis
    Glynnis Member Posts: 360 ✭
    @kmakm love most things crafty but need to lose weight as well so I think I might dtart walking again, gets me out in the fresh air. What about you what do you do 
  • kmakm
    kmakm Member Posts: 7,974 ✭
    Walking is good for me and I do it a lot, but sometimes it leaves too much space for thinking! If I've got a problem to solve it's great. This time last year I was walking almost daily and going backwards and forwards and backwards and forwards on whether to have a double mastectomy and reconstruction or not (I did).  So now a podcast is good when my brain is too noisy.

    I'm trying to work in some yoga for some de-stressing now. Epic fail this morning when I failed to observe the correct starting time and missed it...

    I like baking. Add the cricket on the radio and it's my happy place. I'm fully engaged in what I'm doing and there's no space for my noisy brain to shout negative stuff at me. Currently on the hunt for the perfect oatmeal choc chip biscuit recipe in the quest to find a biscuit for the kids that's vaguely healthy.

    I love my stories, so watch a bit of tv. But I tend to feel too idle if I do that too long, so I like to do some cross stitch embroidery or mending while I have the tv on.

    I also love a big puzzle, 1500 - 3000 pieces. Can't think about anything else when you're doing a puzzle.

    And nothing beats a good book of course! K xox
  • Glynnis
    Glynnis Member Posts: 360 ✭
    Wow @kmakm your one busy lady, but that’s fantastic doesn’t leave much thinking time which is good, I’ve been playing in my cave for a while today so feel a little better tomorrow is another day think I might put those walking shoes on and get some fresh air thanks for our chats been terrific 😃
  • kmakm
    kmakm Member Posts: 7,974 ✭
     :* 

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