Struggling with work!
I haven't blogged for a while. I've been busy trying to get my life back on track after finishing my treatment in September 2014.
I have just started back at work a week ago and feeling so overwelmed with the workload.
I work by myself in a school library and there is so much to do especially at the beginning of the year and I feel that I'm not coping with it at all. I've only done 6 days of work and already I go home crying. My first day was the worst. I have cut my hours down to 3 days a week but management haven't replaced me on the day that I'm not in so the work keeps piling up. I have discussed it with my supervisor but she just says they don't have the money to get someone in to replace me for the day I'm not in. They tell me to do what I can and take it easy but how can I when things need to be done and there are deadlines to meet. I run around rushing to do things and by the end of the day I'm so exhausted.
I want to work but I feel if I keep it up I'm going to fall down in a heap. I can't keep this up, my health is to important to me. My mind and body isn't the way it used to be before treatment. I used to have several jobs on the go but now I can only handle one thing at a time. Maybe it's time to quit my job and try to do something new.
I used to be so positive while going through my treatment and now I feel as if I'm losing that too.
How long does it take to get back to normality???
Comments
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Firstly let me say I finished treatment in October 2013 and I am only now feeling the waters with returning to work. YOU need to do what is right for you.
I have a suggestion regarding the library for you is it possible to get some volunteer mums/dads to help out for a bit ? just a thought.
Like you I struggle with more than one task at a time now but I have a wonderful company who are working with me at doing 2 days per month and building it from there.
Are you sleeping well or do you have the horrible insomnia that is common after our treatments. Are you still on Medications? I have gotten a Petrea King cd "Relaxation" it helps me to get to sleep and then sleep soundly. I feel more in control of life since I began having a good nights sleep.
Just a thought, take it easy on yourself life has changed.
xoxox Soldier Crab
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Thank you both for your comments
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I am slowly improving with going back to work. My attitude is to just do what I can and I set 1 goal at a time and complete it before I start another.
I still struggle with the workload but at least I don't go home crying.
Going back to work has made me realise how much I have changed since having cancer both physically and mentally.
I am now seeing a psychologist to help me deal with my frustrations and the changes that I am experiencing. I have become a different person and I just have to find the new me and do things that I enjoy.
Life is too precious to waste it on things you don't enjoy!
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