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Cowgirl1
Cowgirl1 Member Posts: 66 ✭
in Day to day
Didn't  have a very good day today, at work this morning doing my job then all of a sudden I'm crying wtf.
I have had pain and my boob had been swollen again which I think was the start of the tears, these things come back to you and slaps you in the face.
I ended up going home couldn't stop crying arrr! I called in to see my bc nurse for a hug and a chat she's amazing and caring lady don't know what I would if she wasn't there.
 Things just come over you and you have no control of these emotions even when your cancer free, it's a double sided sword, I know things will be fine tomorrow just bloody sucks.

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  • Vallerina
    Vallerina Member Posts: 183 ✭
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    Hi cowgirl sorry you had a bad day. :-( maybe its the moon or the winter weather... i also started today weeping and tears were never far away the whole day. 3 weeks out from my unilateral exchange with a silicone implant i tried on some of my old  bras this morning and wasnt very happy. I know im probably still swollen but i just wish my life could be how it was before.  My partner has been working  away since the exchange and of course i felt like its because he doesnt want me any more.  I never told any of my friends what ive been through yet im feeling isolated like no one cares. Which is stupid. My son and wife had first baby ,my first grandchild, last week HOORAY and there were a few probs so im having to give them a lot of space have seen bubby twice but havent had a cuddle yet. I am feeling old. I know what you mean i am cancer free as well thank goodness and in the grand scheme of things i know i am one of the really really lucky ones. I think while ur going through the treatment etc youre all strong and purposeful, but now im at the stage where the shock is fading and im going omg this is it this is how i am forever. Its ok to cry and grieve. We have been through something horrible and scary. Youre lucky you have a good breast nurse to talk to. They are wonderful angels. Sorry i cant say much comforting stuff it just isnt my way but i do feel empathy to your plight and agree it sucks!!!!! Xxx
  • Vallerina
    Vallerina Member Posts: 183 ✭
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    And also agree tomorrow will probably be just fine. I go along great getting on with life doing all my old things then wham. Its a bit of ptsd maybe. Xx hugs
  • primek
    primek Member Posts: 5,392 ✭
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    I recall having to just call in sick one day as I just couldn't stop crying before keaving for work . I couldn't really say why, just tired and fed up being scared I think. Next day...big girls panties back on...and on I went.  Think the stress is never far away these days. Kath x
  • June1952
    June1952 Member Posts: 1,834 ✭
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    Hey Cowgirl
    You are not the only lady who has been like that - at some stage we all (as strong as we think we are) experience the same as you.  Where do the tears, sadness, anger and frustration come from ?  Who knows.  Just know that you are not alone !  Get on your horse again tomorrow, Çowgirl' and be the great lady you are.
    Big hugs  Summer  :-)
  • Cowgirl1
    Cowgirl1 Member Posts: 66 ✭
    edited July 2017
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    Thank you lovely ladies as others have said before no one knows how you feel and truly understand what you are going through that aren't in this bloody club oxoxox

    And im crying again!!!!!
  • fairydust
    fairydust Member Posts: 290 ✭
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    Seems post breast cancer is not an easy time. A lot of things had got on top of me and went to see a counsellor. IShe stated that she sees a lot  of her patients after cancer  treatment. She said this timeframe was usually very emotional and difficult. You are right you have to go thru this stuff before you get it. 
    I thought after the final treatment life would suddenly be as it was. Guess what it isnt... not good not bad but different.

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