Forum Discussion

Lythe's avatar
Lythe
Member
5 years ago

Waiting for surgery results

Hiya all,
I was diagnosed with a large Her2+ tumour and 2 lymph nodes involved last October. I have had 6 months of chemo and had my surgery (lumpectomy and sentinel node removal) on Monday and I'm waiting to hear the results from that. During my journey my sister was diagnosed with a different type of breast cancer (no genetic markers, just shitty luck) and she had her surgery prior to chemo. She had to have 2 surgeries and will have a mastectomy post chemo so I know that 1 surgery isn't always enough. The hospital aren't giving me any results until my appointment next Monday and I'm really struggling because it feels like I'm back at my first diagnosis and waiting to get a prognosis on my survival chances. I was doing ok up until last night and I know it's only a few days to go but I just want to curl up in bed on my own and avoid everyone (not so easy with 2 young kids). How did other people cope with this wait? My sister went privately so got her results 2 days after surgery. Oh, and to top it off, it's my husband's 50th birthday tomorrow and I really want to be able to be upbeat and happy for him on his birthday. Is it best to think the best possible outcome? Or better to try and prepare for the worst? Or even a middling outcome?
post-surgery
  • arpie's avatar
    arpie
    Member
    5 years ago
    @Lythe - I hope your hubby had a great birthday & that you were able to enjoy it too.  I am so sorry that your sister has been diagnosed as well at the same time .... maybe you need your family genome checked to see if it is going to be a genetic thing with close family members?

    You've been thru some hard yards with the chemo & now waiting for the results of your surgery ..... it sucks.  It doesn't really get any easier, any time, waiting for results!  I went private & still had to wait more than 2 weeks for my results (and pay $500 out of pocket as well!) ..... We all have fingers & toes crossed for your results xxxx

    I just kept myself as busy as I could, with things that I loved doing (pre op) & was able to do (post op.)  Just do what is right for YOU.  And that is the rule from now on.  ;) 

    Once you get your  results, you'll have your game plan all mapped out - so you'll know where you are heading.  

    Take care, all the best for your results xx

  • Locksley's avatar
    Locksley
    Member
    5 years ago
    Hi @Lythe, Hope your husbands birthday celebrations went well.  Wishing you all the best for your results.  So shitty your sister had to go through this as well at the same time.   Waiting is hard.   Sending hugs xxxx
  • Cath62's avatar
    Cath62
    Member
    5 years ago
    Hi @Lythe,

    I now see the future just one day at a time. I try to stay in the moment. Practice meditation. Meditation is nor about emptying the mind but bring yourself into your breath. Focus just on that and just let the thoughts slip by. The thoughts come but just let them go and breath. Try this even for 10 mins to start and keep practicing it. 

    I think everyone here has had to wait, wait wait and I certainly wasn't good at that but I am learning to accept that I must wait. So hard. 

    I don't talk about prognosis. I don't ask even. I try not to have expectations but rather say to myself...i accept what my outcome is or I accept how things are that I can not change. 

    I hope the celebration goes well for you and the family. Sending hugs xx
  • PV123's avatar
    PV123
    Member
    5 years ago
    Hi @Lythe 
    Waiting for results is the hardest part, truly shitty to have your sister diagnosed as well.  Personally I try not to think too much about prognosis.  Individual people with the same prognosis could have totally different outcomes.  When I find myself thinking about the future, I try and find something to do and keep busy.  I also do meditation and tapping as well.  Enjoy your time with your loved ones.  Good luck with everything. 
  • Shellshocked201's avatar
    Shellshocked201
    Member
    5 years ago
    Hi Lythe, waiting for results is one of the hardest parts of this journey, roller coaster ride or what ever you want to call it.
    It’s a bloody awful time, we all know how you are feeling, we get it.
    I use to keep myself busy, listening to my favourite music, go for a lovely drive in the hills with the family, gardening, a good book, a funny movie.
    I also found mediation very helpful, concentrating on my breathing, taking a deep breath in and slowly exhale, repeat that a few times.
    I found at these times especially taking something to help me sleep better, I was able to cope with things much better with a goodnight sleep.

    Enjoy your day tomorrow with your husbands birthday.


    Stay positive, you’ve got this shit.....
    Sending hugs xx

  • Lisa_E66's avatar
    Lisa_E66
    Member
    5 years ago
    Agree with @primek. I feel like the last couple of months all I do is wait. I am now waiting, after surgery number three which included a mastectomy, to see results from this last op as to whether it was a success and what further treatment I may or may not need. I will find out Tuesday morning. It is tough it really is. But try, as hard as it can be, to be in the present.  I am trying to do that. I agree about curling up in bed till Tuesday morning but that won’t help anyone. So I just try and do things to take my mind off it. It is always there but one day one hour one minute at a time honey. Enjoy your hubbies birthday, try not to overthink things. When my journey first started with finding a small lump two months ago I was positive it was nothing. So now I just think whatever way it turns I will get through it. I do a lot of visualisations - I love the beach so when things get too muddled in my head I imagine myself swimming at my favourite beach. It does give me a few mins of peace and then I just try and press on. But know you are not alone honey. We are with you xxx
  • primek's avatar
    primek
    Member
    5 years ago
    There is no easy answer to your question. I think just go with now. Everyone is anxious and frightened pre results after breast cancer so feeling worried and wanting to curl up and hide is normal. However, as you know life goes on regardless. I decided that I would  just take each day with what I know. Today you know you have your cancer and nodes out and have completed  chemo and still on treatment with Herceptin. Any remaining cells are still being dealt with. You have a loving family and a celebration coming up. Embrace those moments. I found being grateful for being alive right now to celebrate those milestones helped me. I didn't want to miss a moment of my families life. So lovely I would park those dark thoughts, slap on a smile and reconnect in activities with the confidence you are doing everything you can, and whatever the results you will do whatever it takes to continue to be here for your family.
    Take care. X