Finished chemo but.....

@Lillian67 You've got to consider sometimes what would happen if you stopped being wonder woman, lay on the floor, had a complete meltdown, drank half a bottle of brandy, told them all to $#@+ off and took to your bed for a week. 'I'll give you "I've had a bad day." Watch this' 

The whole thing is such a drag. I've just done surgery, chemo and rads. For the second time in a decade. I'm a tough old chicky, but then, I have to be. Thinking about what might happen later is just exhausting, so I don't tend to do it.

 It's not good to feel unsupported, but if that's the way things have turned out there's not much you can do to change people's attitude.  Appart, perhaps, from having the above mentioned tantrum.    Those who have called you and offered help are the ones to focus on: put everyone else in your mental 'freezer' and don't waste your energy on them.

There's always someone here too, your experience sucks, but you are not on your own. Marg xxx

Hi Lillian67 sorry you are having such a rough trot of it lately but keep you chin up. I'm here if you need to talk ❤️ I'm 23 days post mastectomy of my right breast and they way I looked at it was cancer in the right, get rid of it and most of the cancer is gone!. I was unlucky that my lump started from just under my nipple and went downwards, so the whole breast was better off going. I start chemo on 29th June then radiology after that as I have minute cells in the first lymph node with the rest clear. See if there is a breast cancer group near you as talking to woman that have gone thru or going thru the same as yourself helps, if not just message me here as I check this website several times a day. 
It's probably the toughest time at the moment for you, being in the unknown area, and still going thru the chemo side effects, which I am dreading but just know,_you are not alone, we all here on this site understand and will listen xxxx all the best I hope I helped 

Hi Lillian67 I am so sorry to hear that your husband is not supportive or even understanding.
That is not a pleasant place to be and I feel for you.
I am in my second last chemo and will have my last one Monday week.
The week to ten days after feel like crap. So I know just how you feel, I don't feel like being strong, or brave or anything.
You need someone understanding to talk to. Do you have a breast cancer nurse? That is exactly what they are there for.
You can also access your local Cancer Centre, they should have a psychologist you can go to, both to discuss your fears and to work through any issues you are dealing with.
Both of these are free services.
The Cancer Council also has phone counselling services if you are in a more remote area.

I am planning my mastectomy too, I saw my surgeon today.
Weirdly I am looking forward to it, I just want this cancer out of my body! I am not looking forward to the lymph node removal part, but I have already been through a lumpectomy and bilateral reduction so I know the pain doesn't last long and I was surprised at how quickly the skin healed.
How I will deal with it psychologically afterwards is a bit unknown, but that breast has to go, it is trying to kill me.
Is your surgeon nice? It makes it so much easier if they make the explaining and planning process pleasant.

I also have to have CT scans and a breast MRI before surgery.
Even if you are pretty certain the results are going to be fine, there is always that uncertainty and the what ifs. 
It is great that your Oncologist is happy, and that your tumours have shrunk, that is such a good start.
I hope you can start to feel a bit more positive when you are not bogged down in the shitty side effects of the chemo.
As for friends, no, not many call. I am lucky to have lovely neighbours who ask how I am and clients who are supportive, a lot who have had relatives go through the same things so were helpful in letting me know what to expect. I can't imagine trying to do it on my own.

As for being strong for everyone, I felt really sad and a bit angry for you when I read your post.
I felt like shaking your husband and screaming at him.
This is serious stuff here, not a bad day at the office.
I hope it is just that he is finding it hard to deal with. 

Please try talking with the breast cancer nurse or psychologist, they have so much knowledge about the processes you have yet to go through and can help you to come to a more comfortable place to move to the next stages of your treatment.
The breast care nurses also help you through the mastectomy and after care.

If nothing else, I hope it helps to know that I am there going through the same things along with you. Radiation after mastectomy, and then hormone therapy after that.
We have a long road ahead of us, and really, no one who hasn't experienced it has any idea of what is involved.
giving you a great big sisterly hug, Jennie