Trying to remember the whole one step at a time mantra

Hello @Nadi
Thank you for keeping us posted.  I am sorry to hear about the Achalasia diagnosis on top of everything else.  Sending lots of best wishes to you and hoping that surgery provides some long awaited relief.  Great to hear that you have accessed some online support and information that can help you going forward.  Dont hesitate to call our helpline if you need a chat.  

hi Nadi 
I have been struggling with exercise and eating correctly through winter but have maintained my weight I dropped to before winter hit .... lost 10kg  so my goal is to lose the next 25kg  bite by bite ;) 
I sure know none of us want to lose via illness... but I mean you overall determination to regain you health after you BC 

Hugs 
Soldiercrab xxx 

@SoldierCrab yes there are benefits from more weight loss, but it's not the way I'd like to lose it! I hope you're doing ok.

oh Nadi I have been busy and not online only just caught up on this girl ..... Hugs and energy sent your way to deal with another bloody roller coaster ride..... you know we got your back girl  please keep us in the loop of how you are going .... 
YOU have been my inspiration to lose weight so I know you have the will power girl..... 

xxx Soldiercrab

@arpie Thanks, that makes me feel so much better. It was the whole "you'll never eat normally ever again" that upset me so much, but if Keith can do it, dare I say I will too. I am certainly determined enough!! I am enjoyed my pureed lamb stews.Off to the shops now to make another one in the slow cooker.

Thanks @Afraser - digging deep is what we on this network do. I'll be ok. 

Best wishes for your surgery. It's neither what you want or what you deserve, and a few tears seems a very restrained reaction, but it is what it is. We must all have realised that at some point during cancer treatment, we are doing things or coping with situations that in our earlier life we would have considered un-doable or unimaginable. As @arpie suggests, there can be good outcomes when surgery is completed. Digging deep for the resilience and fortitude to take another setback on will be hard, but you have done it before and won through. Strength to you. 

All the best for your surgery, @Nadi - it is great you have found some terrific online help as well for your condition.  Keep us in the loop.

Hoping some of my squishy food suggestions help .... you don’t have to have bland horrible stuff - get some tinned rice pudding & pulverise that too - it is really scrummy, mixed in with tinned peaches.  Really refreshing. Make sure you add the peach juice too.  Just keep sucking it on down - small bits, regularly!

A bit of my background .... I worked as a Dietary Aide at Royal North Shore Hospital for some years back in the 80s ....and had a few different 'permanent' wards to look after - including the cancer ward, Maternity, and burns & plastic surgery.  In the Burns & Plastic surgery ward, a lot of my patients were of 'Full Fluid' diets only, with busted jaws, burns, no jaw (from cancer), wired jaws, & other stuff - so I got used to being 'really inventive' wth providing interesting meals for them other than custard, egg flips & similar!   So I used a 'mega' food processor to smash roast lamb, mint sauce & veg, roast chicken & veg, casseroles & veg - all with extra gravy, so it would fit thru a really big straw - or that they could drink like a soup.   They got the real flavour of a 'natural meal', even if they weren't chewing it!   Even my egg flips had added extras - the custard, cream, ice-cream, extra vanilla, even fruit .... I reckon I was making Smoothies WELL before the word had even been invented!  ;) 

In 2010, when Keith had most of his stomach removed due to cancer - all my training kicked back in & I started 'value adding' to all his early 'slushy meals' - I even added Baby Milk Powder to all his sweet stuff, as it was more 'fatty' than regular milk powder & had higher calories.  I added heaps of melted cheese to add calories (as he'd dropped to 50kg in weight & the surgeon said he MUST NOT go lower!)  I added custard & ice cream & full cream to a lot of his sweet stuff (smoothies with tinned peaches, rice pudding & added extras) and he was getting way  more calories than he ever knew about!   Initially after we came home, he ate too 'quickly' and 'too much' and experienced 'dumping' - where the stomach couldn't take what was hitting it & he was throwing up & feeling faint .... not a good start!  But, regular small, slow meals - and by Xmas, he was eating full sized meals again (he'd been told he's be eating cups of food for the rest of his life!!)

Nadi - Once you've had your surgery, I reckon you'll be right on track for as normal a life again, as Keith has!  I certainly hope so!  Just take it slowly!  ;)  Take care & thinking of you xxx

@Nadi, it goes without saying that we are all thinking of you and hope for the very best outcome for you. Please keep us up to date with how the surgery goes.
XO  <3

Nadi, pityfest away. While you are at it, go outside and scream the loudest you ever have. Make sure you smile at your startled neighbours before heading back inside. It releases so much frustration. Lots of hugs being sent. Love Melody

I think you're being amazingly brave.