Overwhelmed and feeling down

Question

After 2 opinion from different drs I have been told that a total mastectomy is only option for me due to the multiple lesions found in my breast. I am feeling rather overwhelmed at the thought of losing my breast and devastated beyond words. My head is screaming why me what have I done to deserve this. I just want to cry and cry until I can't anymore. I guess want to vent as I don't know any one that has had breast cancer before. I'm very lucky at the moment from all the scans it seems to have just be localized and not spread anywhere else which have been told this is s good sign but I just want to run and hide and wish this all was a very bad dream 😢

karenp23 · Answer

Thank you everyone , I have had an emotional few days but having spoken to another doctor he has really helped me put things in to perspective. I am slowly coming to terms with having the total mastectomy and have to just be patient with the whole process of this journey, its such a life changing event and that I have learnt that I just will have to take things one day at a time.&nbsp; So blessed to have such a big support network on here its been great to read other peoples journeys and the inspiration that it will give me to move forward.

afraser · Answer

Dear Karenp23First thing, you haven’t done anything to deserve this. Cancer has very little to do with deserving or otherwise. No-one actively seeks it and as my surgeon says, the reasons for breast cancer are still a bit of a mystery. But it has happened and as you say, while much better not to have happened at all, your signs are good. Losing any part of your body is no fun, but I had rather lose a breast than an arm or a leg. Mastectomy is not the end of the story, it can be the start of a new story if you can look at it that way. Think about the options, including reconstruction, and you may find it helps to channel your energies towards recovery rather than escape (given the latter, sadly, doesn’t really work). Cry all you want, it’s good to release your fear and disbelief. Once you start treatment, things tend to get a little more organised and clearer. Best wishes.

strongtogether · Answer

Karen, don't you lose hope. It's not nice. Its not your fault. You're in shock. This will change, this will pass and you will survive. Theres not much I can add that hasn't been brought up already. Just know that you are not alone.

sister · Answer

Welcome to this site.&nbsp; The early days are often filled with numbness, despair and disbelief.&nbsp; Believe me - once you start treatment you will also start to get a handle on things.&nbsp; A mastectomy, whether you go on to reconstruction or not, is not the end of the world although it may be hard to believe at the moment.&nbsp; For me, this network was a sanity saver so come back for info, support, to vent or sometimes, to laugh.

tonyam · Answer

Hi @Karenp23, so sorry you’ve got breast cancer.It’s not fair and it has nothing to do with what we did or didn’t do- shit just happens! It doesn’t feel real at first,like you are in a bad dream.It’s very distressing as you embark on the fight of your life.I’ve had to face the crappy bc ride twice. First time was in 2003.I was 47 and I had a lumpectomy,full node clearance and radiation.Seven years later it came back in the same spot so I had to have a mastectomy followed by chemo.Because of radiation I am restricted with reconstruction choices. However,I’ve chosen to stay lopsided as I’m paranoid about another recurrence.Losing a breast is hard and you do grieve.The operation itself is easy enough to get over.I felt more confident once I got fitted with a prosthesis 6weeks post op.It’s now 9 yrs since my last surgery and I’m fine.Keep coming back here for support and ask any questions.Sometimes a local support group can be helpful. BCNA has a directory.I run one in the Hills area of Sydney.

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Overwhelmed and feeling down

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