Thank you all. Ive just spent the last 2 weeks crying, feeling nauseous and highly anxious. I had an emergency visit where they have put me on Ativan. I’ve had anxiety, panic attacks and bouts of depression for over 30 years. I’ve been on my current antidepressant for about 20 years. I’ve had counselling, seen psychologist, psychiatrist, all brought on by childhood mental abuse. I spent 5 years living in a 15km radius. I was finally starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel and this happened. I’m probably revealing too much information lol but I’m pretty sure I can trust you guys.
After having 3 rounds of Fec I noticed the pattern of being very emotional from around day 3, usually lasted about 5 days. By day 9 I slowly improved mentally and physically. By day 14 I would start to regain the confidence to continue with my treatment.
My first dose of Docetaxel initially seemed to be going well. The steroids were giving me my usual red face and rash from the boobs up. My face was a bit redder and hotter than the last three doses. I didn’t get the energy that taking extra steroids could give but by day 4 maybe five I was extremely tired, I battled to keep my eyes open for 2 days, then the anxiety began, along with nausea, which I still have. I’ve had many panic attacks in my life but this didn’t feel normal, it reminded me of the total breakdowns that I have had (3 times) where it left me bed ridden. After a night I’ve being woken up by jolts each time my body relaxed I couldn’t take any more. I rang oncology, and because of the lack of doctors opened on weekends in my area, they advised me to go to emergency. (5 hours waiting when you want to run is not fun)
The annoying thing about having pre-existing conditions is that some doctors think it’s the easy answer. It took 3 chemo sessions, 2 collapsed veins and a blood clot for the doctors to realise their was a medical reason for my needle phobias and all the relaxing in the world wasn’t going to help.
Now I feel I’m having the same issue with my anxiety. Yes, some of my anxiety is brought on by worry but I recognise that this is different and questioned the higher dose of steroids and it effects. I’ve spoken to my oncology team and told them what’s going on. The Ativan has helped but hasnt stopped my anxiety or out bursts of tears. The nausea is always there too.
im having my second dose of Docetaxel on Monday. I’ve been told to prepare as normal. 2 Dexmethsone and 1Lorazepam the night before and again the morning of chemo. Then we’ll discuss possibilities, what ever that means, at our pre chemo meeting.
so sorry for the long story, but those of you on Docetaxel or have have had it, did symptoms increase each treatment, especially if you had anxiety. I can deal with muscle pain and aches and as much as I hate the nausea, I think I can deal with that too. It’s the mental part, going into fight or flight mode is totally scarey and so are the places your mind tends to wander.