It's 1.33 am and another night where the hot flushes are coming in waves. 20 minutes, then 12 minutes then 18 minutes, then 5 minutes then 8 minutes, then 20 minutes and so on. My leg is out of the covers, a glass of ice beside my bed. The fan is on and then off again every few minutes. I am listening to my husband's heavy snores coming from the bedroom next door and I am jealous and desperately tired. The hot flushes have been like this for 6 nights straight and I am not exaggerating when I say it feels like torture. Last night I had about one and a half hours sleep. Just as I am nodding off a flush would come and wake me up again. Work was so difficult today. I don't know how I managed to drive home without falling asleep at the wheel. I have to be on a flight at 8 am tomorrow, I mean this morning, for a business meeting and I don't know how I am going to get through the day or if I will make sense when giving my presentation. The lack of sleep leaves me very cranky and teary - I alternate between the two. My irritability makes me feel like a two-year old who misses their nap. The frequent crying feels like a depression but I am not quite there yet, not far off though. Next week I fly to Japan for the start of a very long bucket list holiday visiting 6 countries in 6 weeks. To be honest I don't want to go. It's always been my husband's big thing, not mine. The truth is I am just so tired. We are booked on tours and it will be go, go, go. Then I will have to sleep next to him which will be like lying next to a big noisy furnace that wants to snuggle. Today I realised I won't have a fan next to me (a pocket fan won't cut it). I really don't know if I can do it. First world problem though, right? There, rant over. At least I know ladies on this network will understand. It is now 1.48 am and here is the next hot flush coming on <sigh>

Hey Nadine, I'm hoping for you that perhaps being away from your normal environment allows you to have a better sleep. I know when I travel I sleep far better than when I working. Crossing fingers that your flushes fade into total insignificance. Can you carry a spritzer to spray yourself with?? I do that for work and find it to be pretty effective. Either way I hope the sleep fairy gives you a good smack in the head with her sleep wand (do mean that in a nice way!!) Xx Cath

Thanks Cath. The spritzer bottle is a great suggestion as it's easy to carry. I'll take a smack down from the from the sleep fairy any day!

Hey Nadi!OMG I know it seems relentless, Im 21 months post Chemo and the flushes definitely settle to what you are having now, but that's not helpful!!! I can relate to everything you said, and all I can think is deep down you're screaming for some downtime and just BE whatever it is you want to do and be for now. I'm guessing the trip you cannot change, however sounds like work is alot of pressure, that you just don't need right now in your life? is there anyway you can put you first? Nadi I remember when I was getting through Chemo, I had to work as am a single parent, but I was so incredibly ill, I fought so hard to keep going in and in the end I had to say STUFF IT!! it will all work out...and I have to put me first. It was the BEST thing I ever did, and since then yes I work, but everything is on my terms, the only way I improved and got the rest I deserved was to stop. Sending hugs xo M

Hey Nadi, I was awake then too. Not so much flushes as anxiety and the inability to figure out where my arms should go. Thrash, spin, sigh, repeat.Regarding the holiday, I can understand where you are coming from. I'd rather be uncomfortable in the comfort of my own home--though I am usually fine when I get going. Then there's the thought of trying to unpack my extended frame from a airline seat after a long flight when my feet won't function after 10 minutes in the car...shudder. Visions of staggering to my feet, taking two steps, falling to my knees and then suffering the humiliation of the whole plane thinking I was pissed as I thrash around in the aisle trying to get upright...Drugs would be the only answer:) I guess it's too late to apply for a singles supplement. Maybe you can splurge and have a room to yourself for a couple of nights. Don't try and carry the spritzer onto the plane with water in it and pack an extra in your luggage in case some officious idiot decides you are a threat to world safety because you are carting over 30mls of fluid or something that could potentially be a weapon (little do they know we are much more dangerous when denied small comforts)

20 minutes, 12 mins, 18 mins, 5 mins, 8 mins. No I am not in labor.

16 Replies

melclarity
Member
8 years ago
@suezyd LOL Ive honestly not found anything that's effective but I know 22 months post chemo now they absolutely do start to slow down thank God!!! though the hot noisy furnace is coming after work tonight woohoo!!! NOT LOL I sleep better alone thanks!!! Hopefully someone will have something life changing for it, but Effexor is no go for me, I shook uncontrollably on it, disgusting. xx
suezyd
Member
8 years ago
Melclarity, lmao, hot noisy furnace, I will tell my partner that tonight, he is exactly that.

Hi ladies, I just popped in to do a search for what to take for these damn hot flushes. Your night sounds very much like mine Nadi. I did just have 4 weeks away in a camper van with the furnace though and although tired, I pushed through, the opportunity to be away and see great places made it worthwhile. I hope you have a great trip Nadi. I just dozed while driving and napped in between other things when I could.

Anyway, I read about magnesium ? What else ladies ? What about that promensil or something ? I just wanted to get something herbal, dr offered me that Effexor today, but I said I would look for something else first. So tired during the day at work, I need to try and get some sleep at night.

i already kick the sheets off, have been a lifetime leg out girl, but the sleep interruption is annoying me more than anything I think. My man just thinks it's funny when all of a sudden I strip while watching to, thankfully we don't get too many walk in visitors, lol.

thanks for any advice you can offer ladies.
iserbrown
Member
8 years ago
@Nadi

Heading off on a holiday! Hope you quickly find a coping mechanism so that your hot flushes fade into the background. Sounds like a marathon of a holiday, a little difficult when fatigued however I am sure you will find some catnap time in between destinations! Do we ever get over the fatigue or just learn to manage?

Take care and stay safe xx
melclarity
Member
8 years ago
I tried Effexor twice, it made me incredibly ill, told the Onc he must be joking!!! I chose the hot flushes instead. Nadi I didnt believe it at the time, but thank God everyone was right that they do calm down. Mine were relentless and beyond ridiculous now I think Id have probs 6 a day roughly, that's progress. I'm mainly in a tshirt when I work cannot stand the heater, OMG. It's freezing at the moment so always in layers. The tiredness is so hard with broken sleep constantly, I wake up for work some mornings thinking WTF I haven't been to sleep yet because of the whole menopause thing! I still sleep with a foot out the bed, but when my partner is with me OMG like you the hot noisy furnace uuuugh!!! x
Nadi
Member
8 years ago

brightspace said:

Hi nadi i have read some where that low dose anxiety med.? maybe Affexor has been used to relieve these side effect worth a try

Thanks Tried Effexor years ago for mild depression. Gave me very bad headaches and head spins. Not keen to go on it again. A shawl is a good idea.
brightspace
Member
8 years ago
Also a light woollen shawl for use at nite instead of warmer donna for your side of bed..this works for me
brightspace
Member
8 years ago
Hi nadi i have read some where that low dose anxiety med.? maybe Affexor has been used to relieve these side effect worth a try
HIT
Member
8 years ago
Oh Nadi life sucks sometimes. I've got a good idea, we'll swap lives for a while - I'll go to Japan for you- its cold here in Perth at the moment and we do have a pool. Hubby can cuddle all he wants - my libido already went on hols without me. My hubby is older and colder and after a triple hernia operation his stomach is COLD....... But seriously you need a holiday, and you will enjoy it!! The planes are cold and blasting that airconditioner on you keeps the bugs away, hey. You can ask for or even buy a fan over there if you need it. Tours, friends often complain that they are sitting too much on them .... so enjoy sitting and relaxing. And hopefully you will de stress - I'm sure that stress makes those flushes worse. Enjoy your holiday.
Hopes_and_Dream
Member
8 years ago
Sorry missed the end of my message.
i was going to say you may be in some warm places and not notice the flushes so much.
Jane xx.
Hopes_and_Dream
Member
8 years ago
Hi Nadi, oh you poor thing. It's amazing the amount of heat generated by other bodies in bed! I hope your body is just going through a hot patch and it starts to ease up soon.
My suggestion for Japan (and I'm sorry to say it will still be quite warm there) is to carry a small folding fan. If you haven't already got one you can buy one at most convenience stores or 100 yen shops for a couple of dollars. They do a great job of cooking and I've always got one in my bag.
I also put a small wet face washer in the hotel fridge/freezer and carry it in a little clip lock bag. Helps to cool down if you put it on the back of your neck. It's great for the plane too.
And turn the hotel air con up to arctic and let your hubby rug up while you enjoy the cool!
Good luck