I was diagnosed with grade 2 IDC ER & PR + Her2- on 19/12. I am 50 years old, married with three teenagers at home, two homeschoolers, one working. I work as a nurse for NDIS. Getting the diagnosis just before Christmas was horrific. So far this has been my plan. Diagnosed 19/12Follow up call from GP on 21/12 to see how I wasNothing happens for a couple of weeks over Christmas/New Year. Bone scan and dye CT scan 5th Jan ( all clear and no lymph activity) Surgeons appt Jan 8th. She was lovely and very respectful ( had sat in on a couple of her operations on my surgical rounds)She talked me through the process and I felt a lot better after that. She also examined me and noted that the lump that was the issue is not actually the cancer, it’s sitting next to it. I have type D density and very fibrous. She mentioned that it’s a tricky one to find and that she’ll need to follow a trail of breadcrumbs. Also mentioned that the cancer is sitting in a DCIS. I can’t find any info on others having that. Today I get the carbon tracer injected and she said that will attach to the cancer so she can see what to take. Next Tuesday I get the blue dye injection for the lymph node activity then Wednesday have the surgery. Nothing happened then everything happened!All this appt making and phone calls while attending a cricket carnival for my son 4 hours from home. My surgeon recommended this site and I’ve been lurking for a bit but today thought I’d share my story. I can’t believe this is happening and I’d love it to go away but it won’t and I need to remember how fortunate this happens in our public system.

It's the questions of statistics and the fact that we don't know on which side we will be. The 97%...or the 3%....and there's no "Stop" "Rewind" button. Very often, the oncotype test puts you in the same position as $5000.00 before...a number, a percentage...a statistic. If I passed a shop advertising 3% off all handbags, I probably wouldn't even bother, but that same statistic in a different scenario seems a lot larger. Remember, these statistics for breast cancer relate to hundreds of thousands, even millions, not just the individual, their cousin and the other ladies in their book group. The MCG holds 100 000 spectators. If a fire was to break out, causing a stampede for the exits, and 3% were crushed to death...that would be 3000 dead people. I doubt that their family and friends would not be content if they were told "Well 97% were fine". For myself, I asked the question that if I declined the chemo, and it did return as stage 4...would I still be happy with my choice or would I wonder if I might have been one of those small percentages?

So sorry to see you join our select little group @MrsMorrisey and @Sliv Re Telling others - I initially told my nearest & dearest first, and then only after surgery & active treatment, I advised others - otherwise you are just repeating yourself over & over & until you get your pathology back, you really won't KNOW your game plan. I let them know that I'd do an email every week or two to fill them in on what was happening - so I didn't have to keep repeating myself, which only kept upsetting ME as much as anything else! Some of my extended family members didn't find out for a year ....Some members open a 'private Facebook Page' or a personal blog, and invite important friends & family to join for updates .... it also ends up being like a diary too .... a day by day narrative of your BC Journey.It's a good idea to cook up some meals in advance and freeze them, so you have food 'ready to go' after your surgery. If family or friends offer to bring some meals, mow the lawn or do ANYTHING for you - say YES! We 'like' to be independent - but this is a win/win situation for both you and your family/friends. It could even be walking the dog or picking the kids up from school/activities.Jump onto this thread & it covers a lot of other areas on the forum - including 'other topics' like your pets, gardens, art & craft & other stuff you may like to check out. We even have some laughs! We NEED to laugh! https://onlinenetwork.bcna.org.au/discussion/23477/a-big-welcome-to-all-our-new-members#latestWe have a 'Christian Group' that you may like to join .... click on 'Groups' in the Blue Banner above - and the 5th one down is the Christian Group.Re diet & cancer - there is SO much rubbish out there about BC being caused from what you eat .... if you have a normal healthy diet - you should be fine. Your Medical team may include a dietitian - or you can ask to see one. It is always advised to not drink too much alcohol - You may find that some friends/family just don't know how to react or what to say - so they do NOTHING. It is as if they've 'dropped' you, and can be upsetting. Try not to take it personally .... you may be surprised who will 'step up to the plate' and who will 'disappear'. It is what it is ..... you will make new friends, and some old friends - you may not see them again! Sadly, that happens. Personally, I've made fantastic friends with some BCNA members & we natter away in the background, via Personal Messages. Your time frame from discovery to surgery is actually quite prompt for this time of year - I went private for my surgery (to have it done as soon as possible) then all my Onc/Rad Onc is on Public & it has been a very smooth journey. .... Your surgery date is the 6th anniversary of my own! Things always move a bit slower over the Xmas Break. You also have confidence in your surgeon, which is great. Make haste slowly afterwards.Take plenty of Deep breaths - take each day as it comes and do NOT try to do things too early after your surgery (eg cleaning etc) as this can actually set your recovery back. It takes a bit of time for things to settle down, for nerves to reattach .... so little stabbing pains around the surgery site may occur. Have you been assigned a Breast Care Nurse yet? Your surgeon may have her own BC Nurse - or if you are in a public hospital, you may be introduced to a McGrath Nurse. They are your 'go to' person for initial questions and answers (apart from us!) take care, and wishing you all the best

Hi @MrsMorrisey, depending on the cancer size,pathology and if no lymph nodes involved you might get lucky and just need the anti hormone drugs. I didn’t need chemo the first time but I did when I had a recurrence.Don’t think too far ahead.As far as telling people, I was really sorry I told everyone the first time as I ended up consoling them.I handled it differently the second time by only telling people when I had a plan and information. I also put my husband in charge of answering the phone and front door- instructing him whether I wanted to talk or not. You are going to need about 2wks at least post surgery of being looked after ie someone to cook,clean and maybe wash your hair for you.Time to put yourself absolutely first.Big hugs xx

Surgery all done. Glad that sneaky bugger is gone.

Understand your breast cancer pathology report (bcna.org.au)The link above, if you haven't seen it already, will help to understand your pathology results as a result of your recent surgeryTake care

The “journey” begins. | BCNA Online Network

102 Replies

Mahjah
Member
2 years ago
I had to go back in to get more out. When they went in second time they found DCIS. The surgeon said I was mm away from having a mastectomy. It all happened so fast I didn't have time to take it in. Thursday results, surgeon says I have a cancellation first thing tomorrow or it's 20th Feb. Firstly my anxiety wouldn't cope with that and secondly it's an hour and a half drive away. So we just scurried and made it happen. Something that is not acknowledged is that we go through the stages of grief with breast cancer. It's a big loss of our self.
Mazbeth
Member
2 years ago
@MrsMorrisey definitely let it all out because as I read somewhere, ‘that shit gets heavy’. I understand how frustrating it is when people offer advice when, as you know, they are not walking this path. No one should comment on your treatment choices outside your health team (and maybe those closest to you) who do actually know what they are doing. It is very insensitive of someone to comment on the medication that you may need to take to put you on the path to a great life. I did chemo and was incredibly grateful it was available and that new treatment options continue to be offered. Try not to listen to the people who are giving you unhelpful advice. I know many of us here could fill a book of comments/actions of others that were completely unhelpful. Your team may mention an oncotype test if they are not sure about chemo. I was diagnosed 4 years ago and was not offered it, but I think I probably would be offered it if they knew what they know back then. I don’t know all of the details, but it may be worth asking about given you have clear nodes etc. and they are mentioning ‘grey area’.
arpie
Member
2 years ago
Vent away - we've all done it for various reasons and WE UNDERSTAND, even if your surgeon & family don't xx

The wheels came off for me a couple of times during my active treatment & I just collapsed in a heap on the floor (almost ....) and ranted & raved & swore .... it made me feel much better! LOL

Continue resting up, and take care xx
MrsMorrisey
Member
2 years ago
Thankyou lovely women for listening to my rants.
Your reassurance is invaluable xxx
iserbrown
Member
2 years ago
It's not uncommon. The aim is for clear margins!

https://www.bcna.org.au/resource-hub/articles/breast-cancer-pathology/#:~:text=If%20there%20are%20no%20cancer,of%20the%20cancer%20is%20removed.

The link above explains margins
MrsMorrisey
Member
2 years ago
I’m confused. Has anyone else had to go back and have more surgery for unclear margins? If it needs to be done then that’s just how it is but geez, not looking forward to that.
My lymph nodes are clear and no sign of cancer. Why would chemo still be on the cards?
I did not get my pathology report.
She did say it was bigger than on the US, 28mm. The invasive is gone. It’s DCIS remaining.
I asked her do I have breast cancer or did I?
She said you did but it’s gone now.
Am I just massively overthinking everything?
iserbrown
Member
2 years ago
A few deep breaths!
Your appointment result today wasn't on your radar!
We're here for you to vent!

Take care
MrsMorrisey
Member
2 years ago

I need to stay away from my husband cos I’m gonna start a fight.
MrsMorrisey
Member
2 years ago
I’m so having a vent.
I’m so sick of people telling me to be positive.
All I do is say it’ll be ok, everything will be fine. Well I kinda feel like it’s not fine.
And I know my situation is better than others but it’s mine and it sucks.
If I have one more person tell me you want to limit the amount of drugs you put in your body I’ll scream.
I’m the last person who wants to take all the drugs so by telling me “oh you don’t want chemo.”
No shit, neither do I!!!
I just had a vent at my family and now I feel like I need to make them better.
I understand my husband is going through this but it’s my body. Would be nice if he said something comforting.
So over it all.
Afraser
Member
2 years ago
@MrsMorrisey

Have a bit of a vent - we all hope to act like reasonable rational people and sometimes you just don’t want to do that any more! There’s no problem in letting it out of your system, reasonable and rational can wait till tomorrow. Your team are doing their best, as @arpie says this situation is not uncommon. Keep all the other thoughts till your next discussion. Although remembering how angry you feel at not getting rid of the cancer in one shot may help you consider what treatment you are willing to do to achieve that end. Best wishes.

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