Forum Discussion
Started swearing!
Hi to all you amazingly lovely ladies! Was reluctant to share my story but feel I need to even if it is just to rant for some relief!
I was diagnosed 2nd Dec with Invasive Ductal Carcinoma grade 2 following a routine mammogram. What a whirlwind! I thought the Dr was talking to 'someone else'..I have had so many emotions since. After reading others posts, I feel slightly 'normal'
The main emotions are anger & sadness. I have tried to do all the right things with my health (all natural products, etc) no family history so it really was a shock. I am struggling with the person I am at the moment..I have always been an upbeat, positive, bubbly person but now am moody, teary and have started swearing!! Also, to add to my woes, I finished my permanent job a couple of weeks before the diagnoses (they sold the business) and I am currently working as an enrolled nurse casually therefore lost all my sick leave (had 2 sickies in 5.5 years) bugga!
Ok, that off my chest.. I think I am slowly coming to grips with it as there really is no choice. So I have had all the 'staging' done last week and go back for results of that tomorrow. Then waiting for the lumpectomy/lymph node surgery which is now listed for 10th Jan even though is listed as 'urgent'! Grrr.. Christmas slows everything down. Then there's the ongoing radiotherapy etc. etc. The waiting is definitely the WORST!! I want this thing out of me, get on with it all so I can get on with my life. I know I am an impatient patient!! I know there are thousand's of women who have gone through the same thing..
Please dont get me wrong.. I am VERY grateful for the medical system we have, they have been very thorough and it is early diagnoses with a good prognosis etc I also have a wonderful husband who is very supportive so for that I am truly grateful. After reading some other ladies stories, it makes me feel i'm being selfish, It certainly helps me not feel so sorry for myself at all.
I'm sure I will find positiveness through this time (it is NOT a journey, as a journey is usually a pleasant holiday) lol
It is early days..I hope my next post I will be a bit more upbeat as I find the old Lisa returning! :wink:
To all my fellow BC 'sisters', I wish you all the very best and appreciate this great private place where we can all chat. X
I was diagnosed 2nd Dec with Invasive Ductal Carcinoma grade 2 following a routine mammogram. What a whirlwind! I thought the Dr was talking to 'someone else'..I have had so many emotions since. After reading others posts, I feel slightly 'normal'
The main emotions are anger & sadness. I have tried to do all the right things with my health (all natural products, etc) no family history so it really was a shock. I am struggling with the person I am at the moment..I have always been an upbeat, positive, bubbly person but now am moody, teary and have started swearing!! Also, to add to my woes, I finished my permanent job a couple of weeks before the diagnoses (they sold the business) and I am currently working as an enrolled nurse casually therefore lost all my sick leave (had 2 sickies in 5.5 years) bugga!
Ok, that off my chest.. I think I am slowly coming to grips with it as there really is no choice. So I have had all the 'staging' done last week and go back for results of that tomorrow. Then waiting for the lumpectomy/lymph node surgery which is now listed for 10th Jan even though is listed as 'urgent'! Grrr.. Christmas slows everything down. Then there's the ongoing radiotherapy etc. etc. The waiting is definitely the WORST!! I want this thing out of me, get on with it all so I can get on with my life. I know I am an impatient patient!! I know there are thousand's of women who have gone through the same thing..
Please dont get me wrong.. I am VERY grateful for the medical system we have, they have been very thorough and it is early diagnoses with a good prognosis etc I also have a wonderful husband who is very supportive so for that I am truly grateful. After reading some other ladies stories, it makes me feel i'm being selfish, It certainly helps me not feel so sorry for myself at all.
I'm sure I will find positiveness through this time (it is NOT a journey, as a journey is usually a pleasant holiday) lol
It is early days..I hope my next post I will be a bit more upbeat as I find the old Lisa returning! :wink:
To all my fellow BC 'sisters', I wish you all the very best and appreciate this great private place where we can all chat. X
44 Replies
- I can't say I started swearing, but I did stop vacuuming, dusting and caring about the things in life that stole my time from family and friends. Waiting is frustrating, but my experience is our medical system acts very quickly when necessary in these situations. Therefore, be confident the delay will not have any negative impact. It gives you time for you and your family to digest, adjust, learn and support each other.
- I can relate...my kids have said to me before "Mum you have started swearing since you got cancer". Not very proud of this but working on it. I can only imagine how eager you are to get your surgery done and dusted. I felt like that too. I just wanted to get it out too. You are in the best place for support. We are here for you.
- Love it Lisa! Swear or do what ever helps you get through this crazy time. We're all so different but one thing's for sure, we're all going through this together thanks to BCNA so you're not alone sister xXx
- Hi Pammy
Yes it is always comforting to know other ladies going through this are feeling the same especially during this looong waiting period!! 13 days to go...but not counting :wink:
Thanks, yes I know once its done and the plan is in place, I will feel much more settled.
Hope all your post op recovery is going ok. Take care..
Hope you have a lovely Christmas with your loved ones XX - Hi lisa
It's such a disbelief when we are first diagnosed the waiting scared the hell out of me I cried for 3 weeks after diagnoses.. I came on here and members told me once you know what you are dealing with it becomes easier.. I haven't cried since surgery 2 weeks ago it will get easier and you will find a determination you never knew you had.. we are all here together our journeys may be different but our fears are the same
merry Xmas xx - I've been swearing since my initial diagnosis in September 2016.
Best wishes for a speedy recovery for the surgery.
Have a merry Christmas xo - Hi Melinda!
Great words..it really is helpful to hear from others who 'get it' and have been through or still going through this crappy stuff! Yes, I am finding out more & more about myself & I'm slowly ploughing through the emotions and as you said, redefining myself. Everything is put into perspective & I feel more grateful for the wonderful things in life :smiley:
But yes...it certainly IS tough!!
Well, I really do wish you a very lovely Christmas and all the absolute best for your upcoming surgery..Big breath..
You've got this too! Big hug to you, Lisa X <3 - PS - Ohhh the swearing made me laugh!!! for some reason that happened to me through Chemo LOL. My kids called me Chemoroo as Id snap and fly off!!!! and aggressive LOL like a boxing Kangaroo haha!! That has settled, but I certainly am less tolerant these days.
- @Lisa50
Hi there!!! I just wanted to say, I hear you!! I've had it twice in 4yrs and I don't fit the criteria at all of what 'they say' in terms of being susceptible to getting breast cancer. Majority of women don't!! That's why its only important to do what feels good for you in terms of exercise and eating...everything in moderation I say! It doesn't discriminate. Until you have your lumpectomy and find out if you are ER- or + or Her2- or + will you know what your treatment will be. I had IDC last year stage 3. It is tough waiting!!! Im waiting for Christmas to pass for a scheduled Mastectomy/recon. Whilst I am grateful to enjoy Christmas, I want the whole thing over and move on!!!! Lisa I can say I too am upbeat but nothing prepares you for this journey...Ive learnt so much about myself, there are some incredibly difficult days and there are somedays where you are really OK. I initially looked at it that it was stripping me back physically, and in a way gave me a way to redefine myself. Boy is it tough!!!! to remain OK with a new look moving forward, feeling battered and torn. You are human, and the best thing you can do, is if you feel positive, be it, when you don't be that too!!! we are all of those things and we need to honor it all! Big breath, day and step at a time! Youve got this! Hugs Melinda xo - Hi and welcome. You will feel so much relief once you have tbe surgery and have the definitive diagnosis, size, grade and treatment plan. Fantastic surgery is brought forward. My MRI showed bigget than the ultrasound and it was. But all treated much tbe same. Vent all you like. My lump was found this time last year and I wasn't seen by a breast surgeon until 4th Jan as was waiting on biopsy results. It's such a struggle putting on the happy face over Xmas but we get through. Best of luck with your upcoming surgery and treatment.
