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angiebelle's avatar
angiebelle
Member
13 years ago

Newbie

Hi :)

I joined today because I have only just been diagnosed with breast cancer and feeling very anxious....also because it is my birthday today! That fact just made me cry for most of today.

I am fast realising how incredibly overwhelming the information is to take in, and the 'well meaning' support of friends and family is not helping. I have been asked in the past 2 days alone - do I want to be buried or cremated...how will I feel when I loose all my hair from chemo, have I got a will etc etc. Needless to say...it has not helped. My mother got on her mobile in the hospital and was sobbing and ringing everyone she knew and telling them that I had cancer and it was really bad.....I was sitting right there :(

So I am looking for postitive support and ideas on where that would be exactly, or just generally to chat to others in the same position.

emotions

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  • DaisyMac's avatar
    DaisyMac
    Member
    13 years ago
    Hi Angibelle. Not a great way to celebrate a birthday but next year WILL be a better one! I was diagnosed last November and have been through chemo and radiotherapy. I am still having three weekly infusions of Herceptin and taking Tamoxifin. I'm not going to lie kiddo, it's going to be tough for the next little while, but you WILL get through and be stronger for it. When I was first told I had BC I cried at the drop of a hat for weeks - me who has never been a cryer, but I sure made up for my previous lack of tears. I thought I was going to fill Sydney Harbour! Three days after my first chemo I think I actually howled when a friend made me go for a walk because I was so constipated from chemo I thought I was going to die ( I didn't). Everyone we passed stared at me probably thinking i was deranged! But you know what ? You're allowed to cry or scream or swear so go ahead. I know how you feel with your mum's reaction, my mum's was the same. She just couldn't deal with it then or during treatment. It doesn't help does it? However this is about you so you have to tell her. I know it affects her and all the people you love. However, right now it's YOU who needs positive support so if others are not on board with that avoid them. Positive people really assist in your recovery. I'm sure you will be surprised and as touched as I was by the kindness and care of others. Sometimes people I didn't expect were the greatest support! This site is a wonderful support also and there is always someone to talk to who understands. While I wish hadn't off been a BC statistic for 2012, I think it's changed me into a stronger person, even though I STILL have days when I have crying jags. Now I give myself permission and accept that it's ok. Good luck and if there's anything I can do don't hesitate to get in contact. Everyone's treatment is different but I'd be happy to listen! Daisy
  • angiebelle's avatar
    angiebelle
    Member
    13 years ago

    Hi Jo.

    Doesn't it just suck!!!! But you are welcome to email me on angie842@gmail.com whenever you feel like it. Family and friends are invaluable but I am realising I need to talk to people that are going through the same thing....and because we have been diagnosed at the same sort of time...we can definitely understand eachother! xx

  • angiebelle's avatar
    angiebelle
    Member
    13 years ago

    Hi Louise!

    I live in Darch (just off Hepburn Rd). I am 39.....just a spring chicken haha!

  • angiebelle's avatar
    angiebelle
    Member
    13 years ago

    Thankyou so much for all or your lovely comments. I am amazed at how I can have a quick little sob one minute and then back to laughing the next. I am hoping to have more of option b and less of option a generally!! I do feel a sense of relief that everyone I wanted to know....now knows. The repitition alone of constantly saying the same speech is exhausting....and also how strange it is to feel empathetic to how others react to the news! What a strange journey this already is. Also attemptoing to turn down the volume on the mountain of advice from emails to books that I have been sent. Especially the stuff about diet....because frankly today I have been fighting the urge to fully marinate in alcohol haha! I have loads of support but constantly worry because I live alone and have 2 young daughters to raise. When I pick a challenge I seem to do things to the extreme! Anyway, thankyou again and hopefully I will get to talk and meet some of you on here....because I am also a social little chick :) xxx

  • JenAli's avatar
    JenAli
    Member
    13 years ago

    Oh Angiebelle, Happy birthday for 2 days ago. Some people are just drop kicks!, We can LIVE with breast cancer. Bad things might happen but if they are not happening today lets stop and ''smell the roses' and give our selves permission to have a good howl and then 5 minutes later find something to laugh about.

    I'm still in the treatment option stage but a friend said how will your husband feel if you have a mastectomy? When I asked him he said wwwhat? so you think this will affect me more than you ??? It made me laugh. I'm really lucky to have him.

    I hope you have at least one sane sensitive person in your life.

    Big hugs , you are not alone.

    Jen

     

  • Enjo's avatar
    Enjo
    Member
    13 years ago

    Angiebelle,

    I know how you're feeling. I was diagnosed last week as well. What a shock and so much information to absorb!

    I'm trying to remember that I'm not alone and that the medical people all really know what they're doing.

    All the best,

    Jo

     

  • Jo_B's avatar
    Jo_B
    Member
    13 years ago

    Hey Newbie, firstly happy birthday!!!    It is probably not going to be the best birthday you have ever had, but it's still nice to hear someone say it.     I have just reached my one year anniversary of being diagnosed with breast cancer.  I had six months chemo and six weeks radiotherapy and am starting to feel back to normal again.    I remember when I was first diagnosed and felt exactly the same way you are feeling today.    It is very lonely and other people, although they have good intentions, just sometimes say and do the wrong things!!!

    You will get through this journey, with the help of us ladies on this site, and with the help and support of your friends and family.  You need to let the diagnosis sink in first and just feel any way you like.  Cry if you want to, scream, throw things, whatever you want.   It is a hard road ahead but so many of us have and still are on the same journey and you can get through it!!

    I wish you all the best in your treatment and recovery and jump on here any time you are feeling down and we will do our best to bring you back up again xxx

    Best wishes

    Jo xxx

     

  • Jo_B's avatar
    Jo_B
    Member
    13 years ago

    Hey Newbie, firstly happy birthday!!!    It is probably not going to be the best birthday you have ever had, but it's still nice to hear someone say it.     I have just reached my one year anniversary of being diagnosed with breast cancer.  I had six months chemo and six weeks radiotherapy and am starting to feel back to normal again.    I remember when I was first diagnosed and felt exactly the same way you are feeling today.    It is very lonely and other people, although they have good intentions, just sometimes say and do the wrong things!!!

    You will get through this journey, with the help of us ladies on this site, and with the help and support of your friends and family.  You need to let the diagnosis sink in first and just feel any way you like.  Cry if you want to, scream, throw things, whatever you want.   It is a hard road ahead but so many of us have and still are on the same journey and you can get through it!!

    I wish you all the best in your treatment and recovery and jump on here any time you are feeling down and we will do our best to bring you back up again xxx

    Best wishes

    Jo xxx