Hi I am priya a 36 yr old mum of 8 yr old daughter. I was recently diagnosed with breast cancer. I had 2 surgeries and the 16mm lump was removed and all the lymph nodes aswell. Surgically m cancer free now but have a long treatment plan ahead. I will start with my chemo soon...I just want to talk and get some positive experience about the chemo journey. I have been told I will lose my hair. I really don't know what awaits...My nurse advised to go online and talk to everyone in this forum and that might ease me down. I would appreciate if I can get any suggestions on how I can walk this path with lots of positivity. Thankyou

Reactions to chemo may differ from person to person, even on the same regime, so any advice needs to be considered in that light. Many chemotherapies will result in hair loss - the chemo is targetting fast growing cells and unfortunately hair follicles fit the bill. You may be offered cold cap, a head treatment that may preserve all or some of your hair. Some people hate it, others find it worthwhile. You may want to prepare your daughter for this, in either event - if she knows it is part of your recovery, it will be easier for her to accept.The most common side effects are nausea and fatigue. You will be given medication to assist combatting nausea, but you may not get it at all. I had two different chemotherapies and was never sick or ever felt nauseous. Unfortunately it's not clear who is not affected, or why! I didn't take any nausea medication after a short while, but only becase I had no symptoms. They can be very helpful for those who do. Fatigue can hit all at once or may creep up. Many people find they have good days and bad days and can plan accordingly. Again, I had none and continued my employment during treatment.The taxane chemotherapies can cause damage to nerve endings (fingers and toes most often, peripheral neuropathy). Let your oncologist know straight away if you experience tingling in your extremities, in most cases it will dissipate after chemo but it can linger.There tends to be a natural concentration on physical side affects - after all, your doctors work with the body. But your feelings and emotions get stirred up by this stuff - feelings of mortality, of uncertainty and anxiousness are incredibly common and very normal. Cancer is a serious illness you weren't expecting! Sometimes you need to talk to someone who is not a friend, not family, to acknowledge your fears and concerns without landing them on someone close to you. A good counsellor can be very useful, even for a few conversations, in helping you face these, focus on the future and not the past, and help your mind help your body with recovery. Your oncologist, day oncology or GP can assist in locating someone suitable. Best wishes.

Hi @priya_09 and @byo_boy.I have been where you both are now and completely empathise with you. Please know that when you get your plan and start it, life does get better. Waiting for the Pet scan results was next level so thinking of you today George and Rebecca. I must say you are an amazing husband George, my husband is amazing too but to get on here and be so involved, you are an inspiration.I have 2 Chemos down (AC), 2 more to go then 12 Weekly Taxols. Lost my hair 2 weeks after the first treatment, day 3,4 and 5 post treatment are like I have a bad flu so lay low on these days but the other days I have felt normal. As we all know everyone will have a different story to tell, hoping you handle it well. There are definitely some positives to this journey like meeting some great people, the amazing support you get along the way and personally my family has become so much closer.Thinking of you, please know that it does get better.

@Alfie and @WhiteLight How do I send a private message?There are several waysto send a private message to another member of the online network.1)Thequickest way to send a private message if you already have the member’savatar/picture in front of you, is to click on their avatar/picture and thebelow pop-up is displayed. Simply click the pink ‘Message’ button:This will generate thatmember’s username in the recipients box for you.Writeyour message.Click"Post" Message"2) By clicking the Envelopeat the top of your screen next to your photo (On a mobile Device – click onyour avatar/photo; then click on envelope):Click on "Pen Paper" icon to start a newconversationStart typing the members username in the"Recipients" box and it will appear.Writeyour message.Click"Post Message"3) Ifyou are on a profile page of a member you can just click pink "Message"button to send that member a private message.This will generatethat members username in the recipients box for you. Just follow the same steps.Writeyour message.Click"Post" Message".Note: You can privatemessage more than one member at a time.If youare part of a private message and you want to leave the conversation, justclick "Leave Conversation". This will also "Delete" themessage from your Inbox.To viewall your private messages click the ‘Envelope’ icon at the top of your screen photo(On a mobile Device – click on your avatar/photo; then click on envelope). Adrop down will appear with all your messages. Click ‘All Messages’ at thebottom of this drop down to view all your private messages

Hi @priya_09, so sorry that you have to join this club that nobody wants to be a part of. We've just begun our journey - in fact I'm literally sitting in the reception of the Royal Brisbane Womens Hospital while my incredibly strong wife Rebecca is upstairs getting her staging PET scan, so I can completely empathise.The last few weeks have been an absolute blur for us with lack of sleep, lack of information and lack of a clear direction just making things worse. Honestly the one thing that's helped keep me sane is just being able to vent and chat here. The group here are fantastic and will definitely play a part in supporting you moving forward.I think the most important thing for us staying positive is surrounding ourselves with a good support network, eating healthy and trying to get as much exercise as possible. We're also taking hope and positivity through stories from others - here's a book I ordered for Rebecca which I think will be useful:Life is Tough (But So Are You) https://www.brionybenjamin.com/book/Also, a story from a close family friend who, despite a rough start, showed real determinationhttps://www.justnowstories.com/post/viv-version-2-0Hope that helps - please don't be afraid to message here, it really helps.Take care,George

@priya_09 Hi Priya, the ladies here have shared and given great advice on here which I always appreciate. Sorry to hear you going through this. personally chemo was ok for me, I did lose my hair but wore wigs and scarves. I am four post post chemo now and my hair is about pixie length. The other side effects were minimal but everyone is different. I sent you a direct message should you wish to chat further. All the best.

Need to talk | BCNA Online Network

18 Replies

WhiteLight
Member
2 years ago
Hi June1952
Thank you so much for the help with contacting individuals. I love learning something new.
Thank you
Alfie
Member
2 years ago
Thankyou very much.
GorgyS
Member
2 years ago
I agree with all the responses above. I was diagnosed last year in August. I just completed chemo and am enjoying 2 weeks of no treatment before starting radiation. I had two partial surgeries to remove the cancer, followed by chemo, and I have upcoming radiation and hormonal therapy for the next 10 years. Looking back, the beginning of this journey was the hardest because of the uncertainty and waiting for the scan results. However, from day one, I knew that the only way to get through this was to stay positive. It is not easy, but this network and its resources have helped me so much. It is also important to stay informed since doctors and nurses do not always have the time to answer all our questions. George is right—good support, eating well, exercising, and putting yourself first are crucial. This way, you will be able to look after your daughter as well. Ask for help and stay connected with this network. There are no silly questions on this forum, only really good answers.
June1952
Member
2 years ago
@Alfie and @WhiteLight

How do I send a private message?
There are several ways
to send a private message to another member of the online network.
1)
The
quickest way to send a private message if you already have the member’s
avatar/picture in front of you, is to click on their avatar/picture and the
below pop-up is displayed. Simply click the pink ‘Message’ button:
This will generate that
member’s username in the recipients box for you.
Write
your message.

Click
"Post" Message"

2) By clicking the Envelope
at the top of your screen next to your photo (On a mobile Device – click on
your avatar/photo; then click on envelope):

Click on "Pen Paper" icon to start a new
conversation

Start typing the members username in the
"Recipients" box and it will appear.

Write
your message.

Click
"Post Message"

3) If
you are on a profile page of a member you can just click pink "Message"
button to send that member a private message.

This will generate
that members username in the recipients box for you. Just follow the same steps.

Write
your message.

Click
"Post" Message".

Note: You can private
message more than one member at a time.

If you
are part of a private message and you want to leave the conversation, just
click "Leave Conversation". This will also "Delete" the
message from your Inbox.

To view
all your private messages click the ‘Envelope’ icon at the top of your screen photo
(On a mobile Device – click on your avatar/photo; then click on envelope). A
drop down will appear with all your messages. Click ‘All Messages’ at the
bottom of this drop down to view all your private messages
Alfie
Member
2 years ago
Hi all
Thankyou for your kind wishes.
Paris_24 I have looked them up they seem nice.
WhiteLight I don't see why it matters and I also do not know how to private message.
Paris_24
Member
2 years ago
@Alfie I understand the Cancer Council might be able to assist with headwear or wigs. I used Starkles here in Brisbane bought mine online and have worn the little caps everyday. Also saw that in the shops that sell breast prostheses, lingerie, swimwear that they often sell some caps too. Good luck with your upcoming surgery and hunt for wigs or headwear.
WhiteLight
Member
2 years ago
Hi Alfie, good luck with the chemo. The place online in NSW, where I ordered my lumpectomy bras from, sell lovely assorted headgear and give advice but I'm not sure if I am allowed to post it here as its advertising. I'm not sure how to message you direct from here.
priya_09
Member
2 years ago
@Alfie...all the best. Hope the axillary clearence goes well. I had the surgery on 4th June and luckily it went well. No complains. Stay positive and lots of healing lights for you.
Regarding the caps, I saw a few online but did not research much. Hope you find something for yourself lovely.
Alfie
Member
2 years ago
So many good tips. I am about to have axillary clearance on Monday. Chemo for 5 months starts on the 29th of July, all going well. I was about to order caps in readiness and like you my hairdresser is on board. I wonder what the orginisations are for caps.
priya_09
Member
2 years ago
Thankyou for all the comments. I am going to get my hair cut done on Saturday Nd will discuss about head wear Nd wigs. I am positive and getting a lot of courage reading about all the individual journey you had :) Glad to be a part of this group. My birthday is in a few days and I have raised a fund-raiser towards a donation for BCNA.