Hi to all you brave people ..l just need to say some things ..l have had 2 lumpectomy in each breast ..Feeling so terrified with the future and what is to come Can't think about anything else but cancer ..lam trying to be strong,but anxiety and depression has reared its ugly head ..l live on my own to much time to overthink ..l still don't believe what is going on ..l walk around in a bubble of unrealality ...l am not sure what else to write ..l can't look at my breasts one is so black all over ...l am struggling to process it all ..Thankyou for listening ..

Hi Bowie, sorry that you find yourself here, But want to encourage you that things will get easier. Do you have a breast care nurse? Have you got a My journey kit from BCNA

@Bowie this is what the online network is here for. The members are here to support you. Having a place to share what you are going through with others that have been there or are in the same position as you will help. One day at a time x

Soldier Crab said: Hi Bowie, sorry that you find yourself here, But want to encourage you that things will get easier. Do you have a breast care nurse? Have you got a My journey kit from BCNA Hi Hun ..Thankyou for a reply ..yes l have the journey kit and a breast care nurse ..l start to read bits and pieces in the pack but then put it away .l know l,am burying my head in the sand a bit ..

Beautiful woman, we completely understand that numb feeling of disbelief that is overwhelming. I want to encourage you today and say that every thought and feeling you are having is normal for your circumstances and I want to promise you that although it might take some time, you will find a way of dealing with the situation which at present is probably too big to comprehend. In the beginning we all look at our diagnosis in its enormity and because of our limited knowledge we are left hopeless and fearful. Your team of surgeons, specialists and nurses and our beautiful network community online is here for you every step of the way. You will soon be able to focus more on dealing with each situation individually as they occur and feel more empowered when you have all the information about treatment etc. I think the unknown is what is the worst for us all, and once we are given some facts and information we feel armed with that info and we feel more at ease. Just keep coming to the network if you have questions or need a shoulder. Take one day at a time, one step at a time and only focus on this day's challenge and let everything else sit on the virtual shelve until time comes to deal with that part of treatment.Wishing you all the best and giving you a massive hug xxx

Ne said: Beautiful woman, we completely understand that numb feeling of disbelief that is overwhelming. I want to encourage you today and say that every thought and feeling you are having is normal for your circumstances and I want to promise you that although it might take some time, you will find a way of dealing with the situation which at present is probably too big to comprehend. In the beginning we all look at our diagnosis in its enormity and because of our limited knowledge we are left hopeless and fearful. Your team of surgeons, specialists and nurses and our beautiful network community online is here for you every step of the way. You will soon be able to focus more on dealing with each situation individually as they occur and feel more empowered when you have all the information about treatment etc. I think the unknown is what is the worst for us all, and once we are given some facts and information we feel armed with that info and we feel more at ease. Just keep coming to the network if you have questions or need a shoulder. Take one day at a time, one step at a time and only focus on this day's challenge and let everything else sit on the virtual shelve until time comes to deal with that part of treatment.Wishing you all the best and giving you a massive hug xxx Thankyou so much for your words l will keep on this site ..l just wish l could cry it out but l can't even do that ,it's just dormant devastation just lying in me ..l send you big big juggles xxx

Just home from treatment newly diagnosed

Brenda5
Member
9 years ago
See? You are hangin in there. You can do it. Be kind to yourself and don't over do things. Not in your peak, nor in your worst but somewhere in the middle is a good spot to be. Time helps a lot. Rather than a journey I tend to think of it as an evolution. You won't be the same old you but they new you might end up wayyyy cooler. <3
nikkid
Member
9 years ago
Hey @Bowie - don't worry about "saying the wrong thing".....you don't need to second guess yourself here. People understand if you're angry, confused, upset, worried. Sometimes it's just easier, and better, to get it out. Hope today is a bit better than yesterday <3
SoldierCrab
Member
9 years ago
@Bowie you are very safe we all get and understand those stages...
Bowie
Member
9 years ago
Good morning to you all ..Thankyou again for your kind words and love and understanding ..l have read so many posts over the last couple of days ..Forgive me if l don't comment l may press awesome or like l just feel l don't have much knowledge or mental capacity to answer ..or may say the wrong thing ....But believe me l take every word to heart and still cling on to the encouragement , bravery ,and hope all of you give me ...Loads of love to you all ..Wishing everybody a better day xxxxxxx
primek
Member
9 years ago
Thinking of you. Know that it does get better and you are stronger than you think. Kath x
Myjourney
Member
9 years ago
Bowie
If there is someone you can reach out to whom lives near you send them a txt and say you are struggling and could you talk. Just talk...we are/have been where you are...I kept feeling I was not going to make it...kept repeating it, it's fear of the unkown with your results. Once you have the results then your surgeon will make a plan. Once you have a plan you have direction and even more support.

call BCNA tommorrow and ask for contact details of support group closest to you, just have to call. Xx
nikkid
Member
9 years ago
Hi @Bowie - taking it just one day at a time...even one hour at a time, is sometimes the best way. Sending hugs xxx
melclarity
Member
9 years ago
@Bowie thinking of you...everything you just said makes complete sense and I touched on in my post, so sending an extra hug! You'll surprise yourself and I dont say that lightly, I say that as someone who has done it twice and felt like giving up a million times over...but you will rise like you never have please believe me, you are not alone! Melinda xo
Bowie
Member
9 years ago
Good evening to all you beautiful brave people ..My day has been a little better ..l have got out of bed a bit ..but just want to stay there as it my comfort zone ..l forced my self a shower and felt so vulnerable kept looking at my boobs and thinking l just feel like I'm on planet cancer never to return to the life l had 3 weeks ...ago l feel strange and weird .like someone else has entered my body ...l hope that does not sound insane ,,but yes I'm still scared ..l go to,see my surgeon next Wednesday for results and treatment from the lumpectomies ..l feel all my friends are going away no one has come to visit ..apart from one person ..l,feel so alone ... maybe they don't no how to deal with it ...Yes it would be nice to have someone to just snuggle up,to at night and tell me it will be ok....l still don't understand how you are all getting through this l fear l won't have the strengh and will give up ..yes l know it's a shit thing to think ..Hopefully tomorrow will be better ..Sending all my love to you all .take good care xxxxx
SoldierCrab
Member
9 years ago
Hello @Bowie letting you know I'm sending you energy to get thru today hugs xxx