Its all so new

Hi Paula

Its good that your hubby has been able to express his feelings to you. The not being able to fix it is a huge thing for those around us. It is an awful feeling of helplessness. It is just the beginning and there will be many more ups and downs for both of you. You will be able to access counselling for you both through the hospital. Use every resource you can. Hang in there. You will both get through this. Karen xox

Dear Paulan,

It’s Lisa from the Policy Team. It’s great that you posted on the Online Network as it can be such a good place get support during this really difficult time. As the other ladies have said, you can get in touch with us at any time to order a copy of our free information pack, My Journey Kit. You can give us a ring on 1800 500 258 to order the kit or you can order it on our website here. The kit provides information about breast cancer, what to expect when you have been diagnosed, advice and tips from other women and information about supports and services that are available.

Also, if you would like more information about the letter BreastScreen sent you before your appointment with your doctor, you may wish to call the BreastScreen Assessment Centre which you attended and ask to speak to one of the nurse counsellors. They should be able to give you more information about the letter they sent and answer any questions you may have.

You might have seen this fact sheet already, but if not, I also wanted to let you know about our fact sheet ‘Anxiety, depression and breast cancer,’ which we developed in partnership with beyondblue. If you would like to have a look, you can order the factsheet or download a copy on our website here. The Cancer Council also runs a free, confidential Information and Support telephone service in each state and territory. To contact the Cancer Council’s telephone service, you can call 13 11 20. More information is also available here.

Warm regards,
Lisa

Hi Paula,

I just wanted to let you know there are a few support avenues for your husband.

MensLine Australia is a professional telephone and online support and information service for Australian men.
Contact Number: 1300 78 99 78  (24/7)

Beyondblue provides information and support to help everyone in Australia achieve their best possible mental health, whatever their age and wherever they live.
Contact Number: 1300 22 4636 (24/7)
Online Chat: 3pm-12am 7 days a week

~ Ann-Marie x

Thank you to you all for your kind words. Now Im worried about my hubby. He had his melt down tonight with tears, the lot.  You see Iv also been in a wheelchair for the last 3 1/2 years & tonight he told me that he has been finding it hard not to be able to fix that & now he cant fix
BC either & he feels useless. Never mention the fact that at 49 he only has 25% heart function (silly man). He also said that he doesn't tell me enough how much he loves me & feels guilty about that too. Do men really think they are Gods & not human LOL. Is there anywhere he can get support? I keep telling him that its not just me that is going thru this, we both are!!!

Paula

Thanks Karen, I was really positive for 2 days, or so I thought at the time. The mind is a really weird thing & mine just loves playing games

Paula

Thanks Brenda, Iv been waking up having panic attacks after only an hours sleep & then I cant get back to sleep again. This has been going on for a week now & Im really sick of it. I need much more sleep than that 7 hours of sleep in a week isn't good

Paula

Thanks Sharon. Yes my hubby will be coming with me

Paula

Thanks. The depression bit is really worrying me because my psychiatrist retired after seeing him for 20 years (he knows me better than I do LOL). So now not only do I have to deal with all the cancer info but I also have to go over my whole psychiatric history with a new psychiatrist as well.

Hi Paulan,

I was diagnosed at Christmas 2015.  You are in the right place, plenty of resources, moral support and a place to say things you might not otherwise around your family and friends! 

You're now on a roller coaster ride that you didn't want to be on. Emotions are high, then they are low, you'll laugh, then scream, you'll be happy, then sad. 

But you are not alone! We got your back, and although none of us may have met, we are united! United in our relentless march to stamp out BC! 

Wishing you all the very best for whatever comes your way, remember ask lots of questions, ask, ask, ask! Write everything down and write questions along with the answers down too! 

Sending you love and light for easy recovery and beautiful days....

-Tracy

stay strong | breathe | believe

Hi there Paulan,

welcome to the forum but sorry you've had to join us. The next few weeks will be difficult as you will not know what you are dealing with entirely and it really is a roller coaster ride. You really don't know for sure what you are dealing with until you've had your pathology results from surgery. I have no other hints to add as the other girls have pretty much covered it. Definitely take someone with you to appointments and take one day/appointment at a time. Speak to your gp in regards to your depression and the not sleeping.  Many have suffered depression before, during and/ or after breast cancer so your specialists will be well equipped to help on that front. Try to change your thinking around to thank goodness they have found it so now I can do something about it! Hang in the. You will get through this and we will all be here to help support you. Take care. Karen xox