I feel so detached I want to cancel my surgery because I don't feel I need it!

@MezDiaz, having a near death experience like a pulmonary embolism would have been a big thing to come to terms with. Now you have received another serious diagnosis of breast cancer. No wonder you have feelings of disbelief. I echo the comments of others - have faith in your doctors. Reach out to those you can trust and share your concerns. This is also a very good forum where you can express those concerns and fears without the fear of being judged or ridiculed.