Feeling scared and just a bit angry
Hi, I'm Karen, 61yo, from Victoria. I was diagnosed in September, my birthday actually, I was numb. I had been dealing with a very coercive relationship, narcissism, gaslighting the lot, to be told ...
Forum Discussion
Hi @Kaz27
Sorry to see you here but as others have said we are a wealth of information between us, those that have gone before us, us and those, like you, starting out!
I am a firm believer that stress has a lot to do with the state we find ourselves in - my life was extremely stressful leading up to the BC diagnosis. I had to reassess what I was doing volunteer and workwise, snub the bullies, and more importantly always smiled and said hello to the bullies when I came across them, to prove their crap may have sat heavy but I have risen up above it and never let on about my cancer diagnosis to them!
For me personally I am fortunate to have been married for a very long time and my hubby is as supportive as he was from the first time, we went out together! My stresses are a little different now as I am a full-time carer for a younger sister with Dementia! It's watching someone you love to deteriorate, and you can only nurture and accept and repeat the answer to a question asked over and over!
I agree with others advice, please seek some counselling - your personal life sounds in turmoil but at present you need all your emotional and physical energy to cope with and beat this, Cancer! Counselling hopefully will give you some coping mechanisms. Both on a personal level and on the Cancer level. I was put with a Counsellor the day of diagnosis and her advice was if you feel yourself starting to stress out then pat your legs saying this is me, this is now and true enough it works, as your thoughts are concentrating on the patting and yourself, it brings you into the now!
Lots of help here, just please don't belt yourself up over the diagnosis, it is what it is and there's plans in place to hopefully beat it!
Sad to read of the plight of your son and daughter in law.
Best wishes
Take care
Sorry to see you here but as others have said we are a wealth of information between us, those that have gone before us, us and those, like you, starting out!
I am a firm believer that stress has a lot to do with the state we find ourselves in - my life was extremely stressful leading up to the BC diagnosis. I had to reassess what I was doing volunteer and workwise, snub the bullies, and more importantly always smiled and said hello to the bullies when I came across them, to prove their crap may have sat heavy but I have risen up above it and never let on about my cancer diagnosis to them!
For me personally I am fortunate to have been married for a very long time and my hubby is as supportive as he was from the first time, we went out together! My stresses are a little different now as I am a full-time carer for a younger sister with Dementia! It's watching someone you love to deteriorate, and you can only nurture and accept and repeat the answer to a question asked over and over!
I agree with others advice, please seek some counselling - your personal life sounds in turmoil but at present you need all your emotional and physical energy to cope with and beat this, Cancer! Counselling hopefully will give you some coping mechanisms. Both on a personal level and on the Cancer level. I was put with a Counsellor the day of diagnosis and her advice was if you feel yourself starting to stress out then pat your legs saying this is me, this is now and true enough it works, as your thoughts are concentrating on the patting and yourself, it brings you into the now!
Lots of help here, just please don't belt yourself up over the diagnosis, it is what it is and there's plans in place to hopefully beat it!
Sad to read of the plight of your son and daughter in law.
Best wishes
Take care