Frustrated by Perfect Survirors

Hi Kyra

None of us are truly OK. We are all scared of recurrence or we are going through the long-lasting side effects of the treatment. These positive attitudes we try to hold onto are part of survivorship. I was diagnosed in 2023, and that was the day I knew my life would never be the same. We are all different. I am grateful to the women who shared their journeys and offered support to me.

I am not a perfect survivor, because the perfect survivor does not exist. But with a positive attitude and by looking after ourselves, we keep going — surviving, for however long we can. In the meantime, connecting with other women who have had similar experiences can help. I also do not want to be judged for looking after myself, laughing, and staying active. I have gone through a lot, and I am still going through a lot.

I am selective. I do not engage with every woman who has been through the breast‑cancer journey, because I do not always relate to their attitudes or philosophies. I understand how you feel. You need to choose who you spend time with and who you rely on for support. If you cannot, ignorance might help. I am lucky to have joined a local cancer support group for women. We organise events, exercise sessions, networking activities, and support each other. We rarely talk about our cancers unless someone needs guidance or advice. BCNA has helped me a lot, especially through the ladies who share their good and bad stories. And we need more stories to be shared. 

Take care❤️