@Klp You’ve got this. We have all been in a similar situation and believe me, we are so much stronger than we think. Try to find something to distract your thoughts. Once treatment starts it goes fairly quickly but leading up to it can be dark. Meanwhile, we are here for you. All fears and rants are welcome here. As for your littlies, you can use them to distract you. Kids are great at that. Also, join the young women’s group on this forum which is specific so that the other women with young children can help allay your fears. Big hugs. xxx