Condolences - yes, it's all confusing and unfair and no-one needs it. My partner has just been diagnosed with cancer of the tongue (no, he doesn't smoke). The treatment is utterly fascinating, complex, technologically brilliant if it was happening to someone you don't know at all, but will leave him speechless (unknown for how long) and having to relearn how to swallow. Like you, his 'option' is not really an option at all. A great many skilled people are doing a remarkable job, explained in careful (if excruciating) and patient detail, in a serious attempt to extend his life and provide some quality to it. This simply could not have happened a comparatively short time ago. So yes, we do have something better. Just not perfect.
Unfortunately, as you doubtless know, the things that pop up on your social media are not real. Nor are doctors and 'Big Pharma' all over the world conspiring to keep easy cures from us. Hope springs eternal and we would love to believe there is some easier path. Or at least not something as overwhelming. How people react is different - even for people with the same kind of cancer (or even two). I've never had radiation and can't speak of that (although I will at second hand soon perhaps), but chemo does vary a lot. I was one of the 'no nausea, no fatigue, go to work' brigade - keeping life as normal as possible worked for me. I also found that asking questions was useful - the more I understood about what was happening, the better I could cope. Not brilliantly or even always effectively, but a bit better is not to be sneezed at.
Treatment passes - you don't think it ever will but it does. And fingers crossed, so do your cancers. You may find talking to a counsellor helpful - I certainly did. Your oncologist is focussed on your body, and if a successful outcome is possible, will want you to grasp it NOW but your emotions and mind take a licking through this too. A professional who is not a friend or family member can provide a welcome outlet for your rants and may even be able to clear the confusion and frustration sufficiently to let some light and some insights in.
Keep breathing. Deal as much as possible with day to day, not next week. Small steps can cover a hell of a lot of ground, ultimately. Very best wishes.
Thank you Afraser,
I am sorry to hear about your partner's diagnosis. I do wish your partner a quick recovery. What a massive life change. I had a friend who had cancer of the tongue; she has recovered wonderfully now.
She had to learn to speak again, not sure about the swallowing, but she has come through in remarkable fashion. This was quite some time ago, and I never knew if she had to have chemo and radiation together.
Funny how now I want to know more, but at the time, I didn't think to ask; I didn't know what to ask.
I am of the mind that if they can fly a man to the moon, they can find a permanent cure to cancer that is less invasive and toxic. I hold on to this as I strongly believe it is possible.
The reports from South Korea are true reports, including the one regarding Bee venom. I have been learning to read medical journals.
There are some incredible breakthroughs taking place. I don't trust big pharma as far as I could throw them, but the man in the lab working diligently with passion for a breakthrough, he or she I support.
I like to rant, whether anyone wants to read or not, but I do not want to offend anyone, but it is a good way to let it out. I have yet to find a good counsellor; I have access to a team, and I will get to them.
I am grateful and thankful for this space and wish you a good evening. I'm off to relax and read about metabolic cancer treatments, Gerson treatments or the Gerson diet. Also, an incredible doctor out of Boston University Dr Thomas Seyfreid. Very interesting stuff.
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