@Sister @arpie @kmakm @sandramj & all the other beautiful women out there reading this! Firstly, @sandramj I must address you first as you have just had some very troubling news & i can only imagine how you must be feeling. The thought of bowel & more breast cancer must be the most sickening feeling but what is on your side is that both cancers are very curable once caught early & the beauty that we all have, is that we are all still under constant care from our surgeons/onc & it is heartening to know that we have "guardian angels" watching over us & who keep checking on us regularly for any signs of disease. I know you will be thinking the worse but as i have learnt from day 1 is that it takes too much strength out of us to worry about things that we don't know about & can't control when we must focus our strength & energy on the things that we DO know & have to deal with. Try to stay positive even though it is hard. You are such a strong women after all you have been through & I hope being on this forum & getting the advice from others will help you through. Fingers crossed & you will be in my prayers so keep us posted on your developments. Hugs xx
@Sister Your words so beautiful as ever & ring true to me. It must be so hard for you thinking of your sister through this time. I am so close to my sister & it breaks my heart to think how hard it has been for you through this as a constant reminder of her. She would be so proud of you & I know she is giving you her strength to get you through this ordeal & we are all here for you too. I hope you are going well with your treatment & staying strong throughout it all as each day passes. Thanks for your hugs & many, many more back to you my friend! xx
@kmakm Thanks for your beautiful words & hugs. It means so much to have your support when you have only 11 days to go til your operation. i can only imagine your anxiety but the operation will mean the end to any chance of future breast cancer & your recon team will "make" you even more beautiful..if that is possible!! i wish you strength & my continual support leading up to & after your op. Hugs to you xx
@arpie So good to hear you are doing so well. It sounds like your skin is healing nicely & the fatigue you are feeling is normal but will pass. I found it good to try & keep active by walking & you are keeping your spirits up by playing your uke! Music lifts your spirits & fills the soul so you will be giving so much pleasure to others & yourself by giving them the gift of your music which will help you recover also. Sad you couldn't partake in the Relay for Life but there is always next time & you will be feeling even stronger then. You may be at the end of the road, like me, once you have had your checkup. Fingers crossed you don't need any tablets! I haven't been told I need any in the future so hopefully we will both get to miss that step. Now that you have passed your 2 weeks after treatment, you will find each day you will feel stronger & less tired as the rad symptoms subside. Have a great time in Norfolk!! Keep looking after yourself & big hugs coming your way! xx
Now for an update on me. I haven't been going too well. The op on Friday was a lot worse than I thought & i am home now in a lot of pain finding it hard to breath & move around. I thought the procedure was pretty routine but didn't realise the pain & discomfort that came after. The day after, I was questioning if i had done the right thing as the pain was unbearable. My surgeon discussed with me beforehand, that he would like to remove some tissue from my uterus as well as removing my ovaries & tubes. While he was in there, he thought it would be good to check it out & send tissue off for testing just to make sure everything was OK. I told him I was happy to do it so it did make the op a little more involved but still took only just over an hour. When I was on the operating table, I said to the medical team through crying eyes, "I am doing this for my mum who died of ovarian cancer" & then I had to wipe away my tears before going under.
During the op, they fill your abdomen with carbon dioxide to blow it up so they can see what they are doing more clearly & give them room to work & remove what they need to. He did find a polyp on my uterus that he removed most of but said it wasn't harmful. After the op, they pump out the gas but there is always some that remain in you which gives you severe pain in your abdomen & under your diaphragm & you also get incredible referred pain in your chest, neck & shoulders as well as vaginal bleeding. My BP was very low to the point of me having hourly obs the entire time I was in there & on one occasion, i even had 3 nurses on 3 different machines during the night as they thought their machines were faulty, my reading was that low! I had heatpacks on both shoulders, pads between my legs & a catheter in so I couldn't move much. Despite the pain I was in, they still discharged me the next day as the pain from the gas was something that had to leave my body naturally & I just had to wait for my body to absorb or pass it. In fact, the more you walk around, the better for you.
On my discharge, when I went to get in the car, the pain under my diaphragm was so severe, I couldn't breath & then I had a panic attack & couldn't move. This has happened numerous times now & my hubby is amazing as he has to lift me upright & hold me so I am able to take in air which is hard when you are crying so much. I am on Endone & Panadol every 4 hrs & it does help me sleep which is good. I have to try & walk as much as i can as that helps the gas escape. From the surgery, i have 3 incision sites that are also very painful as you would expect. It's funny but i think the pain from this op is worse than the pain from my lumpectomy!
The surgeon will ring me this week with the results as they test my ovaries for any cancer or disease & then i will see him in a month or so for a f'up appt. On the day before my op, I saw my rad onc for my last f'up appt & he was very happy with the result from my rad treatment & said my skin looked amazing from the Mepitel so I don't have to see him again. I know as each day passes, I will start to feel better & the pain will lessen. The severe pain takes you by surprise & you can't breath & that is the scary part but so far today, I haven't had any really bad attacks so that is a bonus.
Anyway, my friends, I think I will go back to bed now as typing this LONG post has made my surgery site a bit sore from sitting for so long....my fault!! I guess I feel a bit overwhelmed as there was nothing wrong with my ovaries & i chose to have this op as a prevention of any future cancer so you question whether you did the right thing even though everyone said i should go down this path. I know as each day passes, i will feel stronger & the pain will lessen & i just have to keep reminding myself that my mum would not want me to go through what she did & I know she would be proud of what i have done...& now i am crying again!! Hugs to you all & I know there are many others doing it tougher than me. xxxxxxxx