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My new normal.

Janey235's avatar
Janey235
Member
12 years ago
Dear Pink Friends. I am up quite late tonight (or should I say early this morning) just thinking about what has happened to me this past twelve months or so. I have been waiting for the end of 2013 rather impatiently and it has now gone. It must be physiological but I feel so good. I'm leaving behind one of the most horrific experiences of my life. It's done and dusted! I've left a nightmare of shocking news, emotional upheaval, treatments and surgery and now I know I can deal with just about anything. Yes my body has changed and there will always be scars and I have a little more treatments and surgery to go this year before I can really say it's all ended but the worst is over and it is a huge relief! I am not the same person that I was before this all happened, I'm better. I am looking at life with fresh eyes and liking what I see. I remember years ago how elated I felt when I got glasses for the first time and discovered clarity of details like the veins on a leaf or the soft downy fuzz on a peach and I am feeling the same way now. Everything is clear like the sunlight after a storm. A huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders and I am floating. It's been a quiet start to 2014 spent with my husband and some dear friends at the beach. I celebrated the coming of the new year not by partying but with quiet blessings and gratefulness. I am thankful for many things. The wonderful medical team and treatment that I have been able to have here in Melbourne, the fact that I was diagnosed early, my work colleagues for their sympathy and support, my home and the laughter and love of my family and friends who have kept me sane. I am appreciating the little pleasures in life and letting go of stress and things beyond my control. Those of you who read my poem 'Waiting' will know what I'm talking about (http://www.bcna.org.au/user/12607/blog/62506) when I say I'm well and truly out of that chair. I am embracing my new 'normal'. Happy New Year everyone. May it be a healthier, healing one for us all. Love Janey xxx PS I'm even embracing my grey hair :)
Published 12 years ago
Version 1.0
coping
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25 Comments

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  • Janey235's avatar
    Janey235
    Member
    12 years ago
    Very very true Donna. I know what you meant about the two way street. X
  • mgndam1603's avatar
    mgndam1603
    Member
    12 years ago

    I have come to realise that those coming behind us teach us too. My thoughts had been to help others when my time was done but I am finding it very much a 2 way street, that others are still helping me and for that I am truely grateful.

    Donna

  • Janey235's avatar
    Janey235
    Member
    12 years ago

    I'm 55 this year but I don't feel old. I'm young at heart :).

     

    Ummmm my body is feeling a bit old with the Femara aching joints but I am determined to get back on track this year and beat the stiff old feeling.

  • Janey235's avatar
    Janey235
    Member
    12 years ago
    Your a darling! I should stop reading these replies as I'll get a big head :) I'm so happy it's 2014. It's crazy really what a change in dates came bring. When you really look at it, my bad year should be 2012. That's when I was diagnoses after all. I really should look at 2013 as a journey of getting well again but it's hard to get past all those awful memories of treatments and surgery. But I don't have to dwell on it now, I'm moving on :) Love Janey xxx
  • mum2jj's avatar
    mum2jj
    Member
    12 years ago
    Less of the old baaaahaaaaa. I am a young 51!! know what you mean though, feel like I have known some of you girls for ages. Cheers Paula :)
  • Janey235's avatar
    Janey235
    Member
    12 years ago
    I really like blogging and sharing my thoughts. Knowing that they help others coming behind me is a wonderful feeling. I know what you mean about groundhog day but hopefully you'll have more up days and can move ahead now that your partner is home with you. You can endure lots when you have someone you love by your side. :) Take care of each other Hazel. Love Janey xxx
  • Janey235's avatar
    Janey235
    Member
    12 years ago
    You made my day. Yes I feel the same way. I'd absolutely love to meet you one day old friend :) Janey xxx
  • Hazel_M's avatar
    Hazel_M
    Member
    12 years ago

    I liked reading your blog, actually, have liked all of them including the poems. Some days for me at the moment feel like groundhog day, but it's good to see other people coming out the other side. I find myself looking for silver linings and I am still finding them, so I must be travelling ok. I like your hair, glad you are liking it as well. Look forward to reading many more of your blogs, thank you for sharing your thoughts, it really helps us through this process. 

    Hazel xx

  • jenpen's avatar
    jenpen
    Member
    12 years ago

    Hi Janey....

    Your blog is just lovely...and gives us all hope for a brilliant future!

    You are glowing in your new profile pic! Just a beautiful person inside and out!

    Like Robyn, I am eager to keep reading your fabulous posts....your positivity is contagious....and I really hope 2014 will be the best year ever!

    Big hug...Jenny x

    (P.s. Robyn, hope the Tamoxifen is going ok for you so far!)

  • mum2jj's avatar
    mum2jj
    Member
    12 years ago

    I think it is slowly getting better. I have seen both plastic surgeon and general surgeon this week about it. Will pop a post on my groin pain or photo post about it.... So many posts so little time hehehehehe If I ever meet you in person it will be a great big hug like that of an old friend indeed. Paula :)

    PS Posted in both places hehehe I am becoming a blogger and quite enjoying it ;)

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