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One year on

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[Deleted User]
[Deleted User] Posts: 0
edited September 2016 in Metastatic breast cancer

Today is a day of mixed emotions for me. One year ago today I got the news that my breast cancer had returned, 3 years after my initial diagnosis! I was shocked beyond belief…. my whole world came crashing down yet again. I had fought so damn hard first time around, the treatment was gruelling, and I remember thinking back then “I will NEVER, EVER do this again…NEVER!”

I will never forget the day I got my secondary diagnosis. My sister and I were attending the hospital for what we (and my medical team) thought was to be a fairly routine appointment… just a discussion about another form of preventative treatment... nothing out of the ordindary. I remember us laughing and joking in the waiting room over some silly thing. Then we were called in and out came the words that are etched in my mind and changed my life forever “I am very sorry Celeste, I have some bad news for you…. But we will do whatever we can ”. In one breath, my life was no longer the same.

So here I am, one year on. I have looked death in the face now, on more than one occasion. I have fought hard to stay in this world, to continue to raise my beautiful daughter, who deserves her mum to be around. It has taken the better part of this last year just to accept my diagnosis…to get over the shock…and to pick up the pieces of my shattered world. I have stopped asking ‘why’ and I now make plans...and although they are no further ahead than in 3 month blocks (to coincide with my scans), they are still plans! I have good days and bad days…but at the moment there are more good days than bad, and for that I am truly grateful.

Those who know me well know that I am indeed a battler…always have been…always will be! They say there is no cure, they say I will get terribly sick, but I say roll on with the treatment…hit me with all you've got! I am still standing strong one year on and have the determination to beat the odds and kick cancer’s butt yet again!

In true Celeste style, I say "BRING IT"! Yeah! :D

Comments

  • Janet Plummer
    Janet Plummer Member Posts: 64
    edited March 2015
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    You go girl!  Where there is life there is hope and whose to say you won't be the exception to the rule? You hang in there, live your life to the fullest and stay positive.  You are so brave Celeste. Keep fighting.  I - and many others I'm sure - will be cheering you on. (Sorry if  my words sound a bit cliched, I do mean them sincerely.)

  • Daina_BCNA
    Daina_BCNA Member Posts: 796
    edited March 2015
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    Wow 12 months! I do rember that day Cel. I think you had been a member of the online network for about 12 months at that point. I also remember you had connected with some other members of the online network and you had started to meeting face to face. I am so glad that you have had this extra support around you.

  • Daina_BCNA
    Daina_BCNA Member Posts: 796
    edited March 2015
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    Wow 12 months! I do rember that day Cel. I think you had been a member of the online network for about 12 months at that point. I also remember you had connected with some other members of the online network and you had started to meeting face to face. I am so glad that you have had this extra support around you.

  • Pamelamary
    Pamelamary Member Posts: 240
    edited March 2015
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    Hi Celeste,

    Anniversaries cause such mixed feelings, but the dominant one should be triumph - you have made it so far, against what are often really trying conditions. You have shown the strength and spirit to keep fighting.

    Go girl!

  • Pamelamary
    Pamelamary Member Posts: 240
    edited March 2015
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    Hi Celeste,

    Anniversaries cause such mixed feelings, but the dominant one should be triumph - you have made it so far, against what are often really trying conditions. You have shown the strength and spirit to keep fighting.

    Go girl!

  • Amy
    Amy Member Posts: 233
    edited March 2015
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    I agree with Pam - you should feel triumph - one year down, many many more to go.  I hope the cure is less than 5 years away for all of us girls!

    Big hugs

    Amy x

  • MandaMoo
    MandaMoo Member Posts: 500
    edited March 2015
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    You go girl! We are in this together.
    Anniversary is such a defining moment - I often wonder and wish to go back before that date and escape somehow but then the realist comes back and focused on what we have to deal with right now.
    You should feel awesome for where you are right now.
    And five years for a cure - I bloody hope so (might need it a little quicker please).
    Much love, A xx
  • [Deleted User]
    [Deleted User] Posts: 0
    edited March 2015
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    Thank you ladies for your posts of well wishes! Yes, I will continue to fight, and pray that a cure is found asap for all of us! Celeste ?

  • Sorelle1969
    Sorelle1969 Member Posts: 51
    edited March 2015
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    Hi Celeste, you are truly inspirational.
    Take Care Sorelle xx
  • [Deleted User]
    [Deleted User] Posts: 0
    edited March 2015
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    Thank you Sorelle for your kind words xx

     

  • [Deleted User]
    [Deleted User] Posts: 0
    edited March 2015
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    Thank you Sorelle for your kind words xx

     

  • SueRi
    SueRi Member Posts: 41
    edited March 2015
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    You have been such an inspiration to so many of us and given us hope and lifted us up when we have been down.
    It's so good to know that you have more good days than bad that always helps and I hope that keeps on happening.
    Sue xxx
  • Anne Maree
    Anne Maree Member Posts: 173
    edited March 2015
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    Yes, although prefer not to have the cancer but I am all for seeing triumph in each anniversary. I am happy to see you looking forward with hope. I justed reached 2 years in Sept and some weeks now I have to count the weeks to see if I have missed my monthly Xgeva and zoladex injections. 

  • Anne Maree
    Anne Maree Member Posts: 173
    edited March 2015
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    Yes, although prefer not to have the cancer but I am all for seeing triumph in each anniversary. I am happy to see you looking forward with hope. I justed reached 2 years in Sept and some weeks now I have to count the weeks to see if I have missed my monthly Xgeva and zoladex injections. 

  • Anne Maree
    Anne Maree Member Posts: 173
    edited March 2015
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    Yes, although prefer not to have the cancer but I am all for seeing triumph in each anniversary. I am happy to see you looking forward with hope. I justed reached 2 years in Sept and some weeks now I have to count the weeks to see if I have missed my monthly Xgeva and zoladex injections.