DCIS - normal feelings?

nmrobbo

Hi everyone, I was diagnosed in April this year with non invasive DCIS. I had surgery to remove growth, the radiation which finished in August. I worked mostly through the surgery and radiation treatment. But now I am feeling like I am having a breakdown. I am so angry and emotional and this is not me. I am post menopause (I went through early menopause due to surgery to remove an ovary) and I not on any hormone treatment. Is this “normal” to feel angry and emotional? I am seeing a psychologist. But I feel like my whole world has changed and no one quite understands or get what I have gone / man going through. Since April I have had only one week where I have had no medical appointments. I am completely drained. And guidance greatly appreciated. Xo

Afraser

@nmrobbo

I had a different and longer course of treatment, but it’s not at all unusual for an emotional response to cancer to surprise you when reactions catch up. Seeing a psychologist is a good idea. It’s also quite likely that a brush with a potentially lethal
disease can stimulate any old, unresolved emotional baggage. Your world has changed, your certainties about what life offers and will bring may have changed too and all without any say-so or consultation. Anger is a perfectly understandable reaction.

But it’s not a helpful one - it can feed on itself, rarely provides helpful insights or ways forward. I didn’t experience such an intense reaction but I went through a period of confusion about who I now was and could be - a really good counsellor helped me find my way through and, more than a decade later and after a short period of treatment, her methods are still useful. The mind and emotions get affected by this stuff too, not just the body. Persevere, be kind to yourself and you can find your future path. Best wishes. 

Mez_BCNA

Moved from activity section for @Jenmcd

Hi nmrobbo. I am hearing you loud and clear and putting my hand up to say “ yes, this has to be a normal reaction because I am feeling it too”. 

I was diagnosed with high grade DCIS comedo necrosis in February this year, partial mastectomy in March, and radiation in May. It was a whirlwind of chaos and out of control emotions. Once active treatment had finished, all
of a sudden it was like a WTF, slam into a wall, what have I have just been through moment. It was a definite post treatment slump I fell into and no one around me could understand how emotionally mind destroying this actually was for me. Months of specialist appointments etc were suddenly over and the expectation I had of myself and others had of me was that I was back to “normal” and then comments started,  “you are lucky it was only DCIS and not invasive cancer”, “ well it wasn’t really cancer you had was it, just DCIS”, “it’s better than the alternatives “ etc etc. I was angry! I am still angry and emotional and post menopausal. I see a Psychologist as well (I am a psychologist and believe me it’s been a tough journey being the client!) and she has been the one person to validate my emotions and say tell me it’s perfectly okay to feeling all this, that I am not and never will be the same person I was pre DCIS & that too is okay. I wish I had some wise words of wisdom for you but I don’t 😢 Just know you are not alone and there must be so many others like you and I with our own unique story to tell that are silent. My DCIS journey continues to unhinge me some days, especially the phantom nipple pain and discomfort from a seroma and swelling that is still lurking. I am sure time will help with my acceptance of what this year has been and how it is shaping the  new version of me, whatever that may look like. Go gently and look after you. ☺️