Discussion re Dragonfly (or other ) motif for members who've passed, (so other members know)
arpie
Member Posts: 8,056 ✭
Hi guys
With the sad passing of Wendy55 recently ... it was her desire to have the Dragonfly motif applied to her profile, so that all members who'd interacted with her over the last 10+ years, would know of her passing.
Over the years, we build up really special friendships with members on BCNA and keep in touch both online and offline - even meeting up & spending time together. We support each other in good times & bad .... and that support is so special.
Here is some BCNA history of the 'start' of using the dragonfly motif - both as a show of respect for the member who has passed, and a very gentle way of advising members of their passing. Back then, When members passed away, it was attached to their profile.
https://onlinenetwork.bcna.org.au/discussion/comment/201617#Comment_201617
Once again, discussion re the use of a Dragonfly (or any motif) to signify that a loved member has passed .... has been raised again. But we don't want to hijack this thread .... hence the start of this new thread.
(https://onlinenetwork.bcna.org.au/discussion/26517/sadly-wendy55-passed-away-on-march-3rd-2024/p1)
For a year or more, the Dragonfly motif suddenly 'disappeared' - only showing as a broken jpeg instead. Then ... YAY ... it shows again on those previous members' profiles ... but it is still not being offered to current members or those who've recently passed away, even if they wanted it.
Quite a few of us have raised this issue with the Mods & been told that at this point, the Dragonfly Motif would not be reinstated, with no real reason given - other than it appeared to upset a couple of people. That's OK - if it is reinstated (and that is what a lot of members want ...) it isn't compulsory - so those who don't want it, won't apply for it! Easy Peasy! As with any post that they don't agree with - just scroll on by!
It doesn't seem fair that a few people who don't want it, prevents those who do want it, from having it attached to their profile. It is not offensive in any way.
Just for the record - I want it attached to mine! And I am happy to go with the Dragonfly Motif.
I find this really hard to understand - particularly as it was started by BCNA for one of their own Community Liaison members as a show of respect & caring - and was then extended/offered to all members!
In the recent survey with Tamsin Stanford (on the upgrading of BCNA's hosting platform
later in the year) I know that a lot of members also raised the Dragonfly Motif again, asking for it to be reinstated. If you would like to have the Motif applied to your own profile after you've passed - message Mez with your request.
Keep in mind - it is not compulsory - and you'd have to make your wishes known to the Mods and also make sure a family member notifies the Mods of your passing, giving permission to apply the Dragonfly Motif to the member's profile and keep/archive your discussions.
It doesn't even have to be the Dragonfly Motif - it could be anything!
If not continuing with the Dragonfly Motif - What else would you suggest that is tasteful? (The Dragonfly Motif is shown here: )
I look forward to some respectful discussions on the subject!
take care
With the sad passing of Wendy55 recently ... it was her desire to have the Dragonfly motif applied to her profile, so that all members who'd interacted with her over the last 10+ years, would know of her passing.
Over the years, we build up really special friendships with members on BCNA and keep in touch both online and offline - even meeting up & spending time together. We support each other in good times & bad .... and that support is so special.
Here is some BCNA history of the 'start' of using the dragonfly motif - both as a show of respect for the member who has passed, and a very gentle way of advising members of their passing. Back then, When members passed away, it was attached to their profile.
https://onlinenetwork.bcna.org.au/discussion/comment/201617#Comment_201617
Once again, discussion re the use of a Dragonfly (or any motif) to signify that a loved member has passed .... has been raised again. But we don't want to hijack this thread .... hence the start of this new thread.
(https://onlinenetwork.bcna.org.au/discussion/26517/sadly-wendy55-passed-away-on-march-3rd-2024/p1)
For a year or more, the Dragonfly motif suddenly 'disappeared' - only showing as a broken jpeg instead. Then ... YAY ... it shows again on those previous members' profiles ... but it is still not being offered to current members or those who've recently passed away, even if they wanted it.
Quite a few of us have raised this issue with the Mods & been told that at this point, the Dragonfly Motif would not be reinstated, with no real reason given - other than it appeared to upset a couple of people. That's OK - if it is reinstated (and that is what a lot of members want ...) it isn't compulsory - so those who don't want it, won't apply for it! Easy Peasy! As with any post that they don't agree with - just scroll on by!
It doesn't seem fair that a few people who don't want it, prevents those who do want it, from having it attached to their profile. It is not offensive in any way.
Just for the record - I want it attached to mine!
And I am happy to go with the Dragonfly Motif. I find this really hard to understand - particularly as it was started by BCNA for one of their own Community Liaison members as a show of respect & caring - and was then extended/offered to all members!
In the recent survey with Tamsin Stanford (on the upgrading of BCNA's hosting platform
later in the year) I know that a lot of members also raised the Dragonfly Motif again, asking for it to be reinstated. If you would like to have the Motif applied to your own profile after you've passed - message Mez with your request.
Keep in mind - it is not compulsory - and you'd have to make your wishes known to the Mods and also make sure a family member notifies the Mods of your passing, giving permission to apply the Dragonfly Motif to the member's profile and keep/archive your discussions.
It doesn't even have to be the Dragonfly Motif - it could be anything!
If not continuing with the Dragonfly Motif - What else would you suggest that is tasteful? (The Dragonfly Motif is shown here: )
I look forward to some respectful discussions on the subject!
take care
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Comments
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Thanks @arpie. For me personally I have mets and I think the dragonfly or something should be shown as a way of honouring members who have passed.
I am sorry this discussion got mixed up with Wendy55 recently passing but it was rather triggering knowing Wendy55 wanted this but is was not done.
Mets people are rather hidden away and it's only now we are actually even counted in our own country.
I want my disease to matter and I want to be recognised for dying of mets whenever it happens. We mets folk miss out on so much, cancer takes, takes and takes and I want my dragonfly or some recognition. It is a minor thing. I have emailed Mez now and let my wishes be known and asked her to please make this happen for me. I will also let my family know too.2 -
Personally, I agree with the option to have the Dragonfly (or other symbol) and have made that note in my profile. Should my spirit be let free and family or others advise BCNA then BCNA mods can do a post and the symbol can be added. It is a way to recognise members and lets other members know of the passing, perhaps even preventing newer members trying to contact the person through old posts.1
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I like the idea of adding a note in my profile as an option for now but going forward in the next version of this online network hopefully there will be a tick box or something easy to give permission for a motif or something to the process is made easy.1
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I would also like a dragon fly attached to my profile when the time comes too. I like the option to be able to tick a box now and then my family contacting bcna when it's time.1
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I definitely want the option of having a symbol up when my time comes. I will be making sure my children know to contact bcna to let them know.1
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Discussion noted and passed on to appropriate staff within BCNA1
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I want the dragonfly motif on my profile when my body gives up. I have the dragonfly tattooed on my shoulder and mx site already. Strength and resilience.1
