Hi all,apologies if this has already been discussed but I couldn’t find anything elsewhere. I’m 46, had a right mastectomy (Diep flap) and left reduction in early December for stage 2 invasive lobular carcinoma. My recovery went really well, no pain whatsoever. I still have another procedure to alter the flap and then have nipple tattooing but have to wait until later in the year. Started on Tamoxifen in Jan.I went back to work at the start of March and since then have felt the wheels come off a bit. I went back on reduced hours but in a different role to what I usually do (but just as busy!) 3 weeks in I was feeling overwhelmed and crying at the drop of a hat. This role was only to cover someone else and when I asked for more time on reduced hours/duties I was given yet another new role which is totally unfamiliar to me. Consequently I ended up leaving work early this morning as I was in tears. I think because my recovery went so well I hadn’t properly processed everything that had happened before (diagnosis to surgery was pretty quick). And work seems to have triggered a huge reaction that I didn’t expect. It feels like the reality of all this has hit all at once and I’m on a huge emotional rollercoaster. I am seeing a counsellor and she’s been amazing. Plus I’ve started acupuncture. I’m so used to be busy and I used to love it but at the moment, I just don’t have the capacity for it. Has anyone else had a similar experience?

@RedRose77 I'm learning to find a new normal. I can no longer do the old normal and now I don't want to. I pushed myself for others for long time.

Good for you in choosing to see a counsellor. I didn’t have your experience but a cancer diagnosis can result in all sorts of reactions and sometimes delayed ones. Your brain and your emotions may be as affected as your body and sometimes unresolved issues from your ‘old’ life can present in new and unexpected ways. Keep with the counsellor and see all this as part of developing a new part of your life. Best wishes.

Thankyou, makes me feel better that I’m not the only one 🥰

Thankyou @arpie! I will definitely have a listen to the podcast, thanks for the recommendation. The mental healing is much more difficult than the huge surgery I had (which I definitely wasn’t prepared for). I think I will take more time away from work (I’m a nurse so working from home is hard!)Thanks again, I will remind myself to be kind! X

@Tri thankyou, it’s so true about professional identity- such a huge part of who we are. I think I need to take a step back and stop trying to push myself back to my old normal!

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