Reconstruction or not?

Hi Roxanne,

You posted this the day I had my double mastectomy and reconstruction. I'm nearly 3 weeks post surgery now.

I always knew that being flat wasn't for me. I needed to still feel and look like a woman. I'm 61, have a partner I don't live with, and would've done the same partner or not. It's about YOU and how YOU feel about what you are in the mirror each day. My left breast had 2 malignant lumps and my right had one benign lump. I said take both. I don't want to go through this again in 5 years.

I opted for the diep flap reconstruction at the same time so essentially had a tummy tuck too. The result is better than I imagined. My surgery was skin saving but not nipples. They are to be made at a later date.  I'm still in crop bras but I'm more than happy with the shape. And the tummy.

Decided what is important to you and go with that. That's all that matters. Your profession doesn't dictate how you are yourself as a woman, only you do.

Feel free to private message me if you want to chat more about it 

Sooz

Hearing that you need chemo is a shock and I won't lie and say that it's the most fun thing you'll ever do, but for most of us it is do-able.  It's nothing like the movies.  And then you pick yourself up and go on.

I had a very small her2 cancer and it's known to be aggressive. Although I was told my surgery was potentially curative the recommended treatment was an aggressive chemo and herceptin. Mine was  grade 3 and I had a clear mammogram only 6 weeks before. I didn't want to live with regrets if not doing all for cure. So I did follow the recommended. It was hard but I have no regrets. I also had a bmx but with reconstruction. I wanted to reduce my chances of local recurrence or a new primary growing and being undetected. I continue on also on anastrazole as my cancer was estrogen positive as well and am almost at 5 years with another 5 to go.
I knew from the beginning I would need chemo. It didn't stop me being weepy when I had that consult and sitting waiting for my heart scan in prep for herceptin. It's all part of the acceptance and acknowledgement of facing a life threatening illness.

Hi @rladdley,

Glad to hear surgery went well. I was quite weepy after my single mastectomy. I think for me the medical side of things was a little traumatic. I think however you feel about removing your breasts there will be a reaction and you need to give yourself time to adjust and be very kind to yourself. 

In terms of the oncologist recommendations, yes it is full on. I found that information seemed to be fed to me at different times. Maybe it was good because digesting it all at once would have been onerous. The drs are focussed on action. In truth they cant give you a complete diagnosis sometimes until your surgery. Once your treatment begins it becomes a little less scary because at least you then have some experience and it is a known.  You will feel the whole gammut of emotions and i just had to deal with it from day to day. 

My circumstances are a little different, i had a large tumour so need chemo, radiotherapy, hormones etc for my oestrogen fuelled nasty.  Regardless though it is a shock. I never thought it would happen to me and im sure you didnt think it would happen to you. I cried sad tears in the night but ultimately i decided to get on with it and i suspect if you trust your specialist you will too. It is not really what youd prefer to do but it is doable. Brace yourself a bit for the long treatment. I have 2 chemos left out of 16 (20 weeks). You adjust, you manage any symptoms and you keep going. It hasnt always been easy but ive done it and you can too. Be kind and patient with yourself. You are worth it. 

Im sure we will all be here for you. 

Sending hugs.

Dear @rladdley

I am sure it may not feel like the happiest of Christmas tides but at least surgery is out of the way and no node involvement, excellent!

I had a mastectomy and axillary clearance - several nodes looked dodgy but only one was malignant. As that node was HER2 ( the main tumour wasn’t), the recommended course was chemo, herceptin and then I had Letrozole thereafter (hormonal therapy). My chemo was over six months and probably heavier than your intended regime, because of the node involvement. As far as I know, I had no side effects from herceptin at all. Eight years ago, it was administered by infusion, but now by injection, so quicker and much less hassle. From my experience, therefore, go with the herceptin! It’s been a proven asset for some time. If Letrozole is planned later on, side effects can vary. I have a couple, possibly compounded by my age, but very manageable and no aches or discomfort. Take these steps as they come, you don’t have to buy an entire package in one go. Best wishes. 

Oh dear, @rladdley  -  SO sorry that you are doing it tough.  You've had a lot on your plate & having the surgery so close to Xmas & then the Onc appointment too, throwing a spanner in the works ...... just adds to the general stress of it all.  

You can only go with the Onc's recommendations ... you can get a 2nd opinion of course, but chances are, the advice would be the same.  :(    It is hard to get your head around it all, so I hope you have good family & friends to help support you at this time .... 

I didn't 'do' chemo - but I am sure that others that had similar to you will jump on soon & help talk you thru it xx

take care, make haste slowly & get better first xx

Dear friends, 
Here I am a week after the BMX at home and rather weepy. The surgery went well and lymph nodes clear.  I saw the oncologist on Xmas eve and am confronted with a whole lot more decisions.  I had thought that if I had the mastectomy that would be all.  Sadly not.
My oncologist says that with no treatment  I have 15-20% chance of metastatic cancer in the future.  I had two invasive cancers one hormone receptive,  one not, and one HER2 and one not. He recommends treating both cancers to reduce the recurrence to 4-5%. This means a light course of chemo with herceptin for 12 months and a daily pill, not tamoxifen which I have now stopped taking. 
It's all a bit much really. Has anyone had this too? Thoughts appreciated. 
Happy Christmas!
Roxanne. 

Good luck  on Friday @rladdley

I’m 55. I was due to have my recon at the same time as my single mastectomy in April but this was cancelled due to covid.
Turned out to be a blessing in disguise......I’m now considering having a mastectomy on the other side  for peace of mind and going flat. Just want to get on with my life.  I wear a prosthetic if I feel like it.  

Its hard not to get get caught up in the rush when your head is spinning at diagnosis. My advice is don’t rush into a decision.
My onco reckons you’ve arrived at a decision when you wake up every day and are sure.  I’m 98% sure  :)

Cazxx

Good luck with your surgery. I’m a uniboober and very small breasted so I’m happy to go lopsided and braless.
trust your gut feelings and know that you can change your mind. Xxxx

Good luck @rladdley! Hope it goes smoothly with a quick recovery 🍀♥️