emotional mess
Hope everyone is well. Its been 5 days since my first round of FEC an what an emotional journey it has been.
The first day wasnt that bad. Tired and foggy and hungry ( which was a surprise).Thanks to my wonderful husband i still get up and have a shower everyday ( sort of makes me feel half human). I find that by mid morning i need a nap and that keeps me going till bed time.
Nausea has been ok the stuff they give you keeps it under control, i have found that i burp alot more than usual. Been keeping a diary of everyday feelings and emotions. Nothing too bad untill yesterday thats when it hit me. Just couldnt feel or see positive outcome at all. Feel like its a waist of time and effort. As i said to my beauriful friend i cant be a mother a wife or a friend so whats the use.
Just wondering how many others of you have let emotioins get in the way and how did you deal with it. My body says i am ok but my brain wont budge and this is very hard for me at the moment.
Thank you for all your support. Stay strong
Comments
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Hi Olga, welcome to the mind games part of this. It is a great idea to keep a diary. I have done that since I was diagnosed and it is interestin to go back and see how I got around things. It is a very emotional time especially at the beginning when you are being sent to so many different things and you really have no idea what is happening. If possible you can ask about speaking to a social worker or your breast care nurse. Sometimes the social worker can be organised to come around while you are having chemo.
Over time you will get more control over the emotions but I know it can be hard. People on here are always willing to have a chat and let you know f their experiences with different things, so it is always good to get on here and just ask.
It is worth it to keep fighting. We just have to develop our owns ways of doing it.
Stay strong and take care.
Tracey x
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Hi Olga, welcome to the mind games part of this. It is a great idea to keep a diary. I have done that since I was diagnosed and it is interestin to go back and see how I got around things. It is a very emotional time especially at the beginning when you are being sent to so many different things and you really have no idea what is happening. If possible you can ask about speaking to a social worker or your breast care nurse. Sometimes the social worker can be organised to come around while you are having chemo.
Over time you will get more control over the emotions but I know it can be hard. People on here are always willing to have a chat and let you know f their experiences with different things, so it is always good to get on here and just ask.
It is worth it to keep fighting. We just have to develop our owns ways of doing it.
Stay strong and take care.
Tracey x
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So sorry to hear you are having a hard time at the moment.
I started my fec last week too, and I have been up and down emotionally also.
Sometimes it's just hard to stay positive. That's okay though, we can't be up and positive all the time.
You will always be wife, mother and friend, but right now you need to be selfish and take care of you.
My lovely friends on this site told me this! I have to keep telling myself this too.
You are not alone.
All of us are brave brave brave!
Much love Penny xx0 -
Hi penny
It's so great to have people on here who know exactly what you are going through and to also know that we are not alone. Thank you for the positive words. I know deep down that I'll be ok but it's just so hard to make your brain feel that. I have great support from family and friends and I almost feel bad comaining when so many others are worst off. Keep in touch and we can compare notes on our treatment as it seems we are in same time line.
All the best Olga0 -
Hi Olga,
Your feelings sound all to familiar from what i went through when i was going through chemo. I had a couple of really bad days where I did not want to talk to anyone, sometimes even including my husband and didn;t want to move off the couch. I also used to think during this time I was useless and not a very good wife or mother but then I would say to myself that it is no wonder I have no energy and don;t feel well considering what was being done to my body.I just accepted the fact that after each cycle I was going to have a few bad days and prepared everyone for them. It is only for a short time, though it may feel like forever and just think that while you feel bad now it is for a very good cause and it is to enable you to have lots great times you can have with your family when you are feeling better and have finished your treatment.
Good luck with the rest of your chemo
xox Renata
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Hi Olga,
Your feelings sound all to familiar from what i went through when i was going through chemo. I had a couple of really bad days where I did not want to talk to anyone, sometimes even including my husband and didn;t want to move off the couch. I also used to think during this time I was useless and not a very good wife or mother but then I would say to myself that it is no wonder I have no energy and don;t feel well considering what was being done to my body.I just accepted the fact that after each cycle I was going to have a few bad days and prepared everyone for them. It is only for a short time, though it may feel like forever and just think that while you feel bad now it is for a very good cause and it is to enable you to have lots great times you can have with your family when you are feeling better and have finished your treatment.
Good luck with the rest of your chemo
xox Renata
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Hi Olga,
I have just finished my chemos. Three FEC and 3 Docetaxel(taxotare). I found this period of life to actually go quickly. Try not to be judgemental of yourself as you are going through an understandably traumatic time. You will be out the other side of chemo before you know it and be a stronger person for it.
all the best,
Julia
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