I just found this write up from Charlotte Tottman that was in the Sydney Morning Herald a while back .....
‘Working with cancer patients is incredibly rewarding’
Adelaide psycho-oncologist Dr Charlotte Tottman, 57, has been counselling cancer patients since 2013. When she was diagnosed with breast cancer in 2018, it gave her a new approach in her practice.
Dr Charlotte Tottman’s own experience has given her pause to reflect on her own clinical practice.
“My background was in the corporate sector, but in my mid-40s I did a PhD in clinical psychology and found my niche in psycho-oncology. Working with cancer patients is incredibly rewarding. It’s a privilege to walk alongside someone who is going through this often long, complicated, and gruelling experience.
Both my parents died from cancer when I was in my 20s and all four of my grandparents have had one form of cancer or another. Despite this, I was in disbelief when I myself was diagnosed with breast cancer in 2018. We were on holiday. I was putting on sunscreen when I felt a lump in my right breast. When we got back home there was a free check-up card from BreastScreen Australia buried in a big pile of mail. I looked at it and thought, oh well, if there is anything wrong, this will pick it up.
I made an appointment for the next week not really admitting to myself that there was already something wrong. I think on some level, I believed this couldn’t be happening to me. I was different. I was a health professional. I told myself that even if I did have cancer, it was not going to have the same impact on me as it did on so many of my clients.
Of course, I quickly discovered I’m no different to anybody else, which has been one of my biggest learnings. A few weeks later I was diagnosed with breast cancer. Thankfully it hadn’t spread. I discussed treatment options with my doctor and with my husband, Robin. Because of my family history, we decided to have a bilateral mastectomy.
I thought that if it could save my life, I had to do it. Our four adult children had all left home, so my breasts weren’t really required any more. I also decided against reconstruction surgery. A lot of women – certainly many of my clients – feel pressure to undergo breast reconstruction. Yet reconstructive surgery is a huge endeavour, often involving multiple surgeries, lots of recovery time and the potential for some serious complications.
My own experience with cancer has certainly given me pause to reflect on my clinical practice. One thing I’ve come to understand is the fear of recurrence. The idea that the cancer could come back sort of sticks with you forever once you’ve been diagnosed. It’s a very visceral fear, which I don’t think you can fully understand unless you’ve experienced it. There’s no guarantee that you are in the clear forever. My work with fear of recurrence is a lot better now than before.
I’m also acutely aware now that everybody’s experience is different. I always knew that intellectually, but my own experience has reinforced to me that you may have the same clinical diagnosis as someone else and yet your response to cancer, both psychologically and physically, will never be identical to somebody else’s.”
