Why not join the Living with metastatic private group? Access group via the link here.

Mum recently diagnosed

Hey all,

I've joined this forum in the hopes of connecting with others. 

My mum is 69, diagnosed with breast cancer 2 months ago and now has been diagnosed with metastatic BC in spine and possibly lungs (they arent 100% sure on the lungs) as the spots are so small. 

Shes started oral chemo and hormone therapy today and will see the oncologist again in 5 weeks. 

She seems to be handling it well so far but she's not feeling sick or anything yet so i guess time will tell. 

Im sure its going to be a long journey and I'll be here to support her every step of the way. I currently live with my mum so im glad Im here to be there for her. 

I just wanted to pop in and say hi. 


  • suburbangirl
    suburbangirl Member Posts: 123
    Hello @Formymum19,
    I am so sorry to hear of your mum's recent diagnosis and all of us on this forum understand the fear and anxiety of receiving the news and then facing our treatment pathway.
    I understand Australia has a reputation of being excellent with cancer treatment, and personally I have been so happy with all the medicos and staff I have come into contact with.
    You will get lots of support and advice from members, even if its just to say hello and we are all here with you and your mum. 
    I am so impressed you have joined us and how lucky is your mum to have a daughter like you!
    Sending you and your mum lots of warm wishes.

  • Sister
    Sister Member Posts: 4,960
    Welcome @Formymum19 We seem to be getting more support people joining up so no doubt one will come along and say hello.  It's important for most of us to have someone we can rely on.
  • arpie
    arpie Member Posts: 7,264
    edited November 2019
    So sorry to hear of your Mum's diagnosis - and well done you, for stepping up to the plate and joining up on her behalf.  She may even like to jump on as well at some time, with any questions she may have.

    Where abouts are you (Town/City) as our members may be able to point you to specific groups that may be able to support you both as well.

    You may also like to join the Metastatic Group, as you'll be able to ask more specific questions there.  @Giovanna_BCNA
    @Riki_BCNA - could you arrange for @Formymum19 to join this group?

    One of my buddies with Mets also has small spots on her lungs - and is on oral meds - they are just monitoring it at this stage.  Hopefully the oral chemo & hormone therapy will hold it at bay.

    Did your mum have surgery after her initial diagnosis?

    Sending you and your mum big hugs xxx . take care

  • Formymum19
    Formymum19 Member Posts: 14
    Wow guys i didnt expect so many responses overnight, you are absolute gems. 

    We are in Perth. 

    Mums initial plan when they thought it was localised was to have surgery and chemotherapy. After a pet scan and ct we were told of the mets and they changed the course of treatment so she hasn't had surgery yet. That will be later down the track. 

    I have told mum of the online forums and the  counselling she has available and she said she would use it if she feels like she needs it. 

    Im just trying to be here for her in any way i can. Im going to help her out with some housework today so she can just relax. 

    It's all been quite a shock and i dont think its really sunk in yet. But we will soldier on. Thankyou for all the lovely messages of support. 
  • Anne65
    Anne65 Member Posts: 425
    @Formymum19 I have read your posts with feelings of sadness due to your mums diagnosis but also so much pride in the way you are handling this situation. She must be so proud of you & for you to come on this forum speaks so highly of your willingness to learn, get help & advice & also for us to give you & your family any emotional support you need. This is going to be a long ride for you all but coming on here will give you answers & comfort like you wouldnt believe & from those who have experienced it. 
    The help & support you are giving to your mum is amazing & I know that she is blessed to have you by her side for emotional support & general help when she needs it. Keep up the great work & ask any questions you like as we have heard them all before.
    I lost my mum to ovarian cancer when she was 46 y.o. I was only 3 y.o. at the time so I cant even remember her. I know that she would be proud that I have survived my battle with cancer & your mum is so lucky to have you by her side every step of the way. Wishing you both much love, prayers & strength. xxxx
  • Giovanna_BCNA
    Giovanna_BCNA Member Posts: 1,839
    Hello @Formymum19 I have sent you a request to join the living with metastatic breast cancer group.  Dont hesitate to call our helpline on 1800 500 258 if you would like to speak with a cancer nurse for information and or support.  Kind regards
  • Formymum19
    Formymum19 Member Posts: 14
    @Anne65 thankyou so much for the wonderful words. Thats so very sweet of you. Im sorry you didn't get the chance to know your mum. 

    My mum is a very private woman so she's probably not too thrilled that Im online talking about her journey but i told her Im discussing it and keeping things private (no names etc) she doesn't seem to mind as long as I'm not broadcasting to the world on social media (which i dont use much) and would never do that to her. Its her journey. 

    We haven't always been close but since her diagnosis we are closer and I'm grateful for that. I guess there is a silver lining to everything and i will support her no matter what choices she makes in regards to treatment. 

    She's in good spirits today and we've done washing and tidying up and it's really nice to be spending time with her. We've shared lots of car rides to appointments (she doesnt drive in the city so i take her) so thats been lovely, we've talked alot, shared laughs. 

    No Im just rambling on but thankyou to everyone who has commented with wonderful things to say. 

    What a beautiful community you all have here. 
  • Anne65
    Anne65 Member Posts: 425
    @Formymum19 So heartening to read that this diagnosis has brought you closer to your mum & you are now sharing time together more than before albeit under trying circumstances. It is so true what you said about "silver linings". I learnt early on that my way of coping or making sense of all of this is to try & take out/find a positive around every corner. It is hard & you have to look for it but if you dont, then you can crawl into a deep dark place that nobody wants to go to. I have found 'silver linings" & sometimes they are small but it helps me come to terms with it all & by sharing & helping others is a great way to get that positive feeling. love & hugs xx
  • kmakm
    kmakm Member Posts: 7,974
    Never apologise for rambling on here. That's one of the functions of this place, a home for rambling! Big hug, K xox
  • Sister
    Sister Member Posts: 4,960
    Different people handle things in different ways.  Your Mum may come to sign on to this site, she may just wish to watch from the sidelines or she may never want to see the posts.  Whatever choice she makes is hers but you may get support and information here that will help you to help her.  Never underestimate the role of gatekeeper.
  • arpie
    arpie Member Posts: 7,264
    We have some WONDERFUL people in WA .....  @Annie C  and @JJ70 spring to mind immediately - tho we have many more!

    Feel free to raise any points that you are pondering ..... we have a wonderful database of people going thru every stage of BC ...

    take care, hugs to you & Mum  xx
  • kmakm
    kmakm Member Posts: 7,974
  • JJ70
    JJ70 Member Posts: 983
    @Formymum19, please call Breast Cancer Care WA if you have not been in contact with them already. BCCWA are a community funded charity that help all West Australians diagnosed with BC. They have a metastatic support group, breast care nurses, counsellors, a library, lots of events and can also offer financial support. We are so lucky in WA to have this support.  9324 3703  Best wishes to you and your mum through this tough time.  Tag me in if you need any other PERTH based infor - hospitals, oncs, surgeons.......
  • Formymum19
    Formymum19 Member Posts: 14
    @JJ70 thankyou so much, I'll pass this information onto my mum. Much appreciated.