Post-active treatment fatigue

kmakm

I treated myself to a sleeping pill last night, went to bed early (for me), didn't have to get up for anything this morning, and so had 10 hours sleep. Woke up three times, but nonetheless it was fab.

At 1.30pm I went to an opening day of a new yoga centre that focuses on healing, and particularly healing from trauma. They also have pilates, individual meditation rooms, and a super dooper massage chair. It was very impressive. I did a half hour yoga class which was challenging but not excessively so.

After a bit of wandering about afterwards I started to feel incredibly fatigued. I dragged myself to the supermarket and home. Fortunately my husband was cooking dinner. After hanging up a load of laundry I sat down until dinner. I could barely manage to stay upright at the table and I've excused myself to lie down in bed.

I don't consider that I've had a particularly bad time with fatigue. Active treatment finished 15 months ago and it hasn't dogged me too much. However this is something else. It's like being back on chemo again!

Is this normal? Normal to be so fatigued over a year later? Just wondering!

primek

I'm still fatigued 2.5 years on and accepting thus might be as goid as it gets. It's especially when I have been really busy and stressed with poor sleep for a number of days.
Slowing down and relaxation may have made you actually take notice how tired you are. You know it's fine to take a short nap so you have the energy to keep going in the evening..

kmakm

Thanks @primek.

pammiesyd

I also have fatigue 7 years on, but I am 70 years old. So I don’t expect the fatigue to go away. I seem to be always tired, whether or not I have taken a sleeping pill.

 I hope your fatigue improves with time, but you have a big household to look after, emotionally and physically. So it’s not surprising you get tired.

Afraser

Tiredness may be normal, depending on age, sleep patterns and activity but fatigue usually isn’t. It’s worth addressing the tiredness factors first (sufficient sleep, stress, physical work/activity, accumulation of being tired too often) then seeking help if it’s actually fatigue. Best wishes.

iserbrown

Combination of a lot of things! Lack of sleep that you speak of on other threads is not helping your demeanour.  These links may help you to understand your predicament better and get help. 

https://www.bcna.org.au/health-wellbeing/physical-wellbeing/fatigue/

https://www.cancervic.org.au/living-with-cancer/common-side-effects/fatigue

kezmusc

My hubby gets that kind of fatigue after he uses sleeping pills.  He's a terrible insomniac, always has been.  He'll resort to pills after a week of little sleep. He is lucky if he gets  4 hours a night and can change beds, rooms and to the couch in amongst that.  He calls it his pill hangover that's why he hates taking them.  

Zoffiel

2.5 years post my latest chemo, fatigue is still a frustratingly random problem. Thankfully I now have more good days than bad days, but it's really hard to predict what will trigger a crash. I'm on the couch now, but so I bloody should be after hosting my partner's family Xmas in July  last night (char sui duck--nailed it) too much red, random people snoring in the house, a 6km River walk at dawn , two tandem loads of pruning and a massage.

I don't mind if I've done something to deserve it, it's the sneaky 3pm exhaustion that arrives without reason or warning that does my head in. I've been so tired on occassions I've had to pull up on the side of the road on the way home from work because I'm falling asleep after spending the the last two hours sounding like I've got a brain injury because I  can't string a coherent sentence together. The other shitty side effect is sugar and carb cravings that do nothing but pack on the kilos.

Ah well, what can you do? It's confidence destroying because I don't know when it's going to happen, but life won't wait and I can't be held hostage by something I can't control or predict. On one plods.

Sister

I heard yesterday at the conference (can't remember which speaker - possibly excercise pyschologist - @Anne65?) that we can expect to suffer side effects of treatment for 2-5 year afterwards.

kmakm

@Sister Cripes. Well that explains it.

As I said, I haven't had too bad a run with fatigue. And it definitely was that. Today I'm tired (it's been busy) but I'm able to be upright without the overwhelming urge to lie down.

You're right about it being confidence destroying @Zoffiel. I think about getting a job, the sustained level of concentration required, the stress, and then coming home to deal with the family, on my own more often than not, and if I then have one of these fatigue attacks at any point...

@kezmusc I haven't had a reaction like this before. I felt good all day, until I didn't!

@Afraser @iserbrown I'm working on improving the tiredness situation. I'm going to bed earlier and improving my sleep 'hygiene'. I'll keep trying.

Brenda5

I don't push through any more when that incredible tiredness hits me because if I keep on being active I get over tired where everything aches and I can't turn off and blissfully sleep it away. Some days are great and even hubby will notice but others are just a write off.

Anne65

@kmakm Sorry to hear you have been feeling a bit flat lately & that fatigue has got the better of you. Please dont despair because as @Sister has said above, this was spoken about during the conference on the weekend. According to my notes,  the Clinical Psychologist, Dr Charlotte Tottman said that is can take around 2 years post treatment for the body to recover & this may vary according to the individual. Also in my notes is that scar tissue from radio can form up to 5 yrs after treatment so its important to keep exercising & stretching to keep the body supple. I reckon the yoga & Pilates would be good for this. So try to be kind on yourself & dont get down on a day when your energy levels may not be as high as you would like. Easier said than done as we all want to do more than our bodies allow us! To quote Charlotte again, one thing that was mentioned a lot during the conference was that we all had to get used to "The New You" which is totally different from the one before cancer. We all expect to be able to do what we did before, but in reality, we cant. We need "acceptance" & to "re-calibrate expectations" to be able to move forward. Hope this helps, my friend. love & hugs xx

kmakm

Thank you for your thoughts @Anne65. No despair here. At the moment anyway!

I've really struggled with the whole 'not the same as before' thing. Honestly it's still a work in progress, but I have shifted a tiny bit towards acceptance. This of course is a grieving, and grief is difficult and uncomfortable. I think I'll always be sad. Too much has been taken with all the cancer in my life. That's grief though. You don't really get 'over' it, it just becomes part of your life.

I set my intention when I meditate and one of the words I use is acceptance. I am still deeply resentful but that's farting against thunder, so I'm actively trying not to go there.

I feel so sorry for my husband who's now saddled with a shadow of his former wife. 'In sickness' eh?

How are you doing? K xox

Anne65

@kmakm I think your husband is a lucky man to be married to such  a strong, resilient women like you. Yes, you may be "different" than before but your heart & soul are still the same & that is why he married you & what he would love about you. It is hard to come to terms with the "new" us & many find it hard to accept the new Version 2. Dr Tottman herself was diagnosed with BC & to hear her speak about how she helps others with their torment & then to hear her story about her battle, was quite incredible. Here is a women that truly knows what we are going through as she is & has gone through it & has faced many a battle. That made what she said at the conference even more powerful as she is living proof that you can get over to the other side with the right help & mind-set. Be kind to yourself my dear & dont rush it. Know it is OK to feel shit & grief & resentment but also realise the strength you have & how you have helped so many of us on this forum. If we dont pick out some positives in this whole process, then we will all go MAD!!
I am doing great, thanks & i always considered myself to be one of the lucky ones as my diagnosis/treatment was so much easier than most of you. I am working, exercising (too much!) & for me, life is the same as it was before apart from a little scar under my boob. I am on no medication so its just a yearly mammo plus a few extra routine blood/health checks that have had to be added to the list. 
We are all here for you & if i were you, I'd make regular visits to that new yoga centre for a stint in that super dooper massage chair!! take care xx

Sister

And it resonated that Dr Tottman recognised how hard it is to take her own advice - that it's very much a work in progress.  You don't have to be happy about the way things are now but it's important to try moving towards accepting it.  Ggrrrr....

kmakm

@Sister That's reassuring to hear! I feel like such a failure for failing to thrive in survivorship.

https://youtu.be/Srn0xkXTSgs

I'll keep trying to accept. I can't see how acceptance and happiness can coexist in this context. However I see how the pain is in the struggle, so I'm trying not to.

Dr Tottman sounds great. I'd love to hear her speak on this.

@Anne65 Did a yoga class today, followed by 20 minutes of meditation and then a session in the massage chair. Was so exhausted when I got home I had. 40 minute nanna nap, something I hardly ever do!