Final chemo hurdle
I've been quiet on here since October 2015, but religiously following all the posts and gleaning lots of helpful information while getting on with my 4 chemo treatments 21 days apart! First one was horrific but then after adjustments to medication and a welcome 'jab in the tummy' on second day, the next two sessions were horrible, but manageable! No dramas, just deal with it! Today was my final chemo and I can't fathom why I keep being asked 'what am I going to do to celebrate' - even by the oncology nurses! What do I have to celebrate - not yet anyway! I feel so ungrateful not to be on some sort of high! Of course I know I have to get through the next 10 days first, so maybe it's just the chemo fog making me feel depressed! Can anyone tell me when it's okay to feel it's 'over'! I've had a left breast mastectomy (2 operations), lymph node biopsy (all clear) and have triple negative so no hormone treatment or radiotherapy to come! Reading all these posts I am so much luckier than so many of you - and I take my hat off to everyone on here! Wish I could be as brave and positive as many of you are!
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Well done you. I have only just had my first a week ago so months to go.
I heard you still need to be careful and look after yourself especially your nails in the sun for several weeks later. Just keep doing what you are doing and it will come to you when to feel you've properly reached the finish line in mind and body.
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Hi be kind to yourself it is a tough trip. Talk to your doctors if you need more help with feeling so low You can call Cancer council or breast care nurse. I ended up going to see a counsellour. It is strange because people think we should be jumping for joy.Take time out for you and rest
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Hi Linda, good to hear from you again ?? Finishing chemo is a huge milestone but bc is still a traumatic experience. I found my last chemo the hardest to get over, think I'd been running on adrenaline then fell in a heap. Took me 6 weeks to start feeling stronger & more like someone I vaguely recognised as me. Don't be fooled into thinking everyone is brave and positive, this is tough & we all feel that in our own way. Me, I'm too darned ornery to let bc take over my life, I absolutely refuse to be defined by this one evil thing when there is so much more good to hold on to....... doesn't mean I don't feel overwhelmed & alone. Seems to me we need time to grieve what we've lived through before we can celebrate the new life that awaits. Take the time to rest and recover, you've earned it, with love, Trace??
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Hi Linda
i fully understand what you mean. Chemo may be done but the side effects last a while. I finished chemo (TCH) in Oct 2014 and am still dealing with some side effects. I have been told the issues I have now will probably be permanent. The fact is chemo may be done and dusted but you may still have treatments to go, radiotherapy, hormone treatments, herceptin etc. it's definitely a relief when chemo is finished but the process/journey hasn't finished yet. Be kind to yourself and if still feeling low, talk to the doctors and see about some counselling. It does help. Take care. Karen xox
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Thanks for helpful, supportive comments! I think I may need to talk to someone to try to lift this dark fog that has drowned out my normally cheerful (at least outwardly) personality! I seem to have lost my sense of humour somewhere in this! I think my family all think I'll be jumping up and down full of energy and happiness in a couple of weeks but I just see a long road of aggravation ahead trying to get back on track! I'll get there! I'm listening! One day/week/month at a time! Now to deal with this chemo few days first! Thanks all!
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