New to this

Janet A
Janet A Member Posts: 281 ✭
edited October 2016 in Newly diagnosed

I have read your posts and must admit some sound so familiar!  

I am newly diagnosed so its all fairly overwhelming,  i have had two surgeries one lumpectomy the other last week to clear a margin. I am finding interesting the reactions in my friends, one in particular is almost competiting with me, weird. Now is ignoring me for the attention i received from other friends. Most of my contact is online as i have just moved to a new area and know little people so far. I also live remotely as well. I am fine with my own compny but do sometimes feel isolated which brings on thoughts that aren't always positive, any ideas?

I am yet to find out what path i will be taking next  with treatment.  I will have to travel down to brisbane for that which is 1000 ks away. I guess i am looking for coping mechnisms that will work for me! 

Cheers Janet

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Comments

  • Tink
    Tink Member Posts: 60 ✭
    edited March 2015

    Welcome to this wonderful supportive site!  I've gotten so much support and ideas from the other ladies, who are all in the same boat.  I had a mastectomy in August (in Brissie) and have 2 more rounds of chemo to go. I found it amazing how quickly your body and spirit recovers after the shock of being diagnosed. I am on the second day back at work in a temp role.  Ok, I am feeling pretty nauseous, I'm having hot flushes and I forgot to put my fake boob in my bra this morning but hey, life is not too bad!!!  Stay strong and check in here regularly - it's a wonderful help.

    Tink xx

  • KathleenT
    KathleenT Member Posts: 116 ✭
    edited March 2015
    Hi Janet

    Gosh, you are remote! Echoing the other thoughts from friends on the site, this is a great place for sharing, venting frustration and anger, or just plain whingeing! We're all in similar boats and know all the feelings.
    I too had friends who were suddenly "high maintenance" -either they ignored me altogether, or treated me differently, because they didn't know what to say to me. Haven't really had anyone trying to "compete" with me.

    My strategies for dealing with all the low and depressing feelings go like this:
    Have a journal, where you can write down things that are bothering you, including negative feelings you're having. Have 2 pages for each day; negatives on one side and positives on the other. For example, on the left page, you might put "feeling very sad like there's not a lot of hope". On the other side, like an answer, you might put "how much time and energy am I putting into this feeling? Will it last forever? Can I do anything to stop myself from feeling sad?" This nay seem as if youre being hard on yourself, but it does work. And when you're listing all the medical issues you've got, on the right page say "there are always people worse off than me".
    I also practise visualisation, where you lie flat on your back on the floor or your bed, take 3 really slow deep breaths, close your eyes and imagine you are in a favourite beautiful place. Soft ambient music may help. Its a form of calming meditation.
    Then of course, always come back here and talk to us, & ask about anything at all.
    I hope you enjoy the friendship and love you will find here:come back often! Lovely to meet you!
    Love from
    Kathleen xxoo
  • KathleenT
    KathleenT Member Posts: 116 ✭
    edited March 2015
    Hi Janet

    Gosh, you are remote! Echoing the other thoughts from friends on the site, this is a great place for sharing, venting frustration and anger, or just plain whingeing! We're all in similar boats and know all the feelings.
    I too had friends who were suddenly "high maintenance" -either they ignored me altogether, or treated me differently, because they didn't know what to say to me. Haven't really had anyone trying to "compete" with me.

    My strategies for dealing with all the low and depressing feelings go like this:
    Have a journal, where you can write down things that are bothering you, including negative feelings you're having. Have 2 pages for each day; negatives on one side and positives on the other. For example, on the left page, you might put "feeling very sad like there's not a lot of hope". On the other side, like an answer, you might put "how much time and energy am I putting into this feeling? Will it last forever? Can I do anything to stop myself from feeling sad?" This nay seem as if youre being hard on yourself, but it does work. And when you're listing all the medical issues you've got, on the right page say "there are always people worse off than me".
    I also practise visualisation, where you lie flat on your back on the floor or your bed, take 3 really slow deep breaths, close your eyes and imagine you are in a favourite beautiful place. Soft ambient music may help. Its a form of calming meditation.
    Then of course, always come back here and talk to us, & ask about anything at all.
    I hope you enjoy the friendship and love you will find here:come back often! Lovely to meet you!
    Love from
    Kathleen xxoo

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