Newly diagnosed, waiting for sugery and scared
Hi, my name is Libby and I'm 41 and diagnosed with ILC and DCIS in my right breast early November...been prodded, poked, squeezed, pushed for the last few weeks and by the sounds of it a lot more to come. My sugery is booked in for 3 December and at the moment the hardest thing I am finding is knowing that I have cancer in me and I have to wait till Dec to get it out...I am so worried that it will spread in that time...but I know after visiting my specialist several times that there are a lot of women out there just like me waiting for their sugery too. I am having a lumpectomy and hoping that results come back after sugery in a positive light...that would be a nice xmas pressie...I have 5 children aged 16, 15, 10, 9 & 7...I have told my older children but am not quite sure what to say to my younger ones...friends are telling me not to tell them that I have cancer because I will simply worry them unnecessarily but would rather get advice from women that have experienced what I'm dealing with...so any thoughts would be appreciated. I am an earlychildhood teacher and have left work whilst I deal with this...a lot of people work through their entire treatment which is amazing..but I know in myself that I need to take time to walk on the beach, enjoy the sunshine, breath the air, spend extra time with family, bake biscuits lol...basically wrap my head around what is going on...I still think I am going to receive a phone call telling me it is a mistake...I feel lazy that I'm not working...I would perhaps consider working but the face to face contact with the kids is too much (some are aggressive). I have been reading the blogs everyday and end up crying...I just can't stop crying sometimes...I put on this brave face for the kids and my partner but I am so scared...I know everyone says it's not as bad as you think and stay positive but at the moment I guess I'm having a down day...hope I don't have too many of them. Ok, well thanks for listening to my waffle everyone :-)
Libby
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welcome to the site, I am sure you will find lots of support and hopefully answers to your questions.
What you are feeling is very natural, we are all blown away when we are diagnosed and scared, its the great unknown. You are also entitled to have bad days, they will come along all through your treatment and this site is great for venting when you need to.
There are groups online in many areas depending where you live, some meet face to face and that is a great support. There is also a young families group and they may be able to give you advice on telling your children.
I wish you well, stay in touch.
Donna
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Thanks Donna and Rita..I appreciate your responses and I have already found this site to be great...I've already started making a list of useful tips just in case I go through similiar treatments...so thank you everyone who is putting those on the site.
I have so many questions that I want to ask...and find that although my specialist was helpful I now don't see her until the morning of the sugery which is three weeks away. On the morning of the sugery I have to have dye injected around the tumour so they can mark which nodes it goes to...I have been told that no local anesthetic is given for this procedure and it is quite uncomfortable...any advice for this one ladies...I get extremely anxious about needles and normally take rescue remedy jubes but will be fasting for sugery so won't be able to. I also have to have a wired guided lumpectomy in my other breast..I have a fibroadenoma and another lump which they didn't biopsy but have decided to remove just to be safe. Has anyone had one of these and please tell me they give me a local for that one.
Thank you in advance
Libby :-)
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Like you I had the wire and the dye the morning before my surgery, it was hectic too believe me. To insert the wire they use the mammogram to guide the wire, it is uncomfortable but not overly painful, They had issues with mine and did it twice. The dye for me was 4 needles around my nipple, to be honest it wasn't as bad as I had anticipated and the needles are over with very quickly, its like a bee sting. I had a blue dot the size of a 50 cent peiece on my breast for about 18 months, it just faded away with time.
My daughter came with me though she wasn't allowed in with me, whilst I was waiting and there was loads of that I was with her.
Whilst you aren't seeing your surgeon for a few weeks if you have questions ask the breast care nurse, I am sure you will find her helpful.
Donna
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