Friends say the dumbest things
I have chosen to tell a select few friends for support but now wondering about a couple of those. I guess time will tell who is who on this with me. I was feeling emotional 3 days after surgery and phoned a friend. After asking how I was and me explaining how confronting it all was this friend said 2 things: 1. Join a support group and 2. You're not the first to go through this and you won't be the last. Seems harsh to me. It did stop me in my tracks and I did stop being emotional probably because I couldn't believe she said this. It certainly has made me very careful what I say in future to her and less inclined to share. I have friends who would never be harsh like that and acknowledge/validate my emotions which is great but this person clearly is not one of them. How does everyone deal with people who basically tell you to get on with it?
Post Mastectomy Pain Syndrome
Dear Sisters.. Has anyone had Post Mastectomy Pain Syndrome? 12 years after my first Mastectomy and full auxiliary clearance, I’ve experienced itching; then prickling pain and feeling of inflammation along the scar and near the edge of the scapular under the arm. Most annoying in its suddenness like an attack. Also felt like waves of pain. Relieved mainly with cold pack. .. until the next attack! Anyone else had this experience?Home from Surgery
Hi, I'm home now (yesterday) and it's over. On the morning of my mastectomy surgery (Monday 18 May) I was feeling quite anxious but trying to remain positive at the same time. The staff were lovely but I found not as friendly as my first lot of treatment for wide local excision with nodes removal or perhaps it was me with more major surgery to have and super aware of everything around me! In recovery I had quite a bit of pain they had trouble getting me to a pain free point. Then taken back to a room to stay overnight. I was advised to peek at my scar as soon as possible and not to avoid looking as I would feel worse if I delayed looking. I could see a line of stitches when I looked down through my gown and thought well that's it! Snoozed in and out a bit with some pain relief. But didn't sleep much through the night. Doctors and Nurses saw me on Tuesday morning and asked how I felt and said they would perhaps look at sending me home on Wednesday and I could stay Tuesday night and sort out the pain relief issues. Nurse said to have a shower and see if this made me feel better. Well being a bigger girl getting dressed and undressed in front of a stranger is something I have struggled with. I married my first boyfriend! Young female Nurse was lovely and said she would help me. Being an independent person and sometimes stubborn I said I would try myself. Managed to get undressed - not easy I tell you. Someone needs to invent Velcro undies so I don't have to bend down to remove undies. I managed to fling them off around the room avoiding looking at myself. I turned the water on. Put my heavy drain tube bottles on the floor. Turned the water on and looked in the mirror. Well the sobs came loud and hard. The running water didn't drown them out as I had hoped. I knew I had to let it all out so I could deal with it and move on. Lovely nurse called out. Are you crying. I said nooooo. Sobbed louder. She said it's OK if you are, are you crying and I said yesssss. She said do you want a hand. God no, because now I was a hideous deformed beast! Stayed in the shower a long time and was ready to attack anyone who said it's time to get out. Someone else would like some hot water! Took a long time drying myself and put my brain back into gear with well - bad boob gone, want to live. It will heal. The hardest thing now was how do I get my legs through my undies! Wrapped myself in a towel and asked the nurse for some help. She was lovely. Wishing I had packed a lipstick because I wanted a bit of colour of my face. Nurse said I would feel better after breakfast. Had a few bites of breakfast and then threw it all up. Waste of a good shower. Got cleaned up again and had black tea and savoy biscuits
Dealing with emotions
Hello ... I'm generally not a joiner in community forums of this type, but here I am ... I was diagnosed on December 23 last year (2018) and had surgery (lumpectomy and sentinel node biopsy) on January 15. I start radiotherapy on Feb 18. I've recovered physically really well: my surgeon is great, she's done a fabulous job and I don't think I'll have a scar - so probably no permanent physical reminder. I'm back at the gym and am walking regularly and I hope to start running again soon. So the physical side of things is okay. I have a wonderfully supportive husband and even though my grown up kids live in other states (as does my sister, my mother, my brother and every other family member plus my best friend) they're all really caring and fabulous. But my emotions are a bit all over the place at the moment. I don't want to think of this as a big deal, but for some reason it kinda feels like a big deal. Is it? Or am I just making something big out of something that's ordinary and routine and not really a big deal at all? Does anyone have any tips on how to deal with anxiety about returning to work? I've been working from home this week, but today decided to go in to work. I drove (for the first time since my surgery) and when I parked the car I felt really anxious. It took a while to get up the courage to go into the office and now I'm not super keen to go back tomorrow. Any advice is greatly appreciated.
Praying for the clear margins
hi - its been a week since I've had my post-chemo lumpectomy (WLE) and node removal and I'm doing ok. I get my pathology results next Tuesday and I'm really nervous. I know there is nothing I can do now to change the outcome, except think positively. My underarm is uncomfortable where the nodes were taken out as the nerves are cut/moved. it is an unsettling feeling to have a number underarm. I really don't like it and the thought of more surgery does get to me. I am on my own and with the long weekend coming up I am trying not to disappear into my own head. I really could use some positive thoughts and vibes ahead of Tuesday. Thanks!
One is BIGGER than the other!
Hi I had an early diagnosis and lumpectomy, chemo, radiation and follow up treatment of right breast in 2003 (aged 45 years). As I've aged, my treated breast is shrinking and shrinking and shrinking and is now very obviously a different size to my left breast. 1 Has anyone else experience this? 2 Do you think it would be considered 'medically necessary' surgery if I wanted a reconstruction for health fund purposes? Appreciate any feedback - thank you so much.
Waiting for surgery results
Hiya all, I was diagnosed with a large Her2+ tumour and 2 lymph nodes involved last October. I have had 6 months of chemo and had my surgery (lumpectomy and sentinel node removal) on Monday and I'm waiting to hear the results from that. During my journey my sister was diagnosed with a different type of breast cancer (no genetic markers, just shitty luck) and she had her surgery prior to chemo. She had to have 2 surgeries and will have a mastectomy post chemo so I know that 1 surgery isn't always enough. The hospital aren't giving me any results until my appointment next Monday and I'm really struggling because it feels like I'm back at my first diagnosis and waiting to get a prognosis on my survival chances. I was doing ok up until last night and I know it's only a few days to go but I just want to curl up in bed on my own and avoid everyone (not so easy with 2 young kids). How did other people cope with this wait? My sister went privately so got her results 2 days after surgery. Oh, and to top it off, it's my husband's 50th birthday tomorrow and I really want to be able to be upbeat and happy for him on his birthday. Is it best to think the best possible outcome? Or better to try and prepare for the worst? Or even a middling outcome?
