My next stage

Question

Hi Everyone,

Firstly it's amazing to read all of your stories and advice you give to each other. It's overwhelming the wealth of knowledge you all have and so reassuring and comforting that you can come to a place where you will certainly get better answers than Google. I thank you for that.

This is my second time posting and I'm not quite sure if I've got it down yet but I have completed my surgery 3/7 and been given my results today.

I'm 36 and have had a lumpectomy on my right breast with extended incision for sentinel node biopsy. No nodes were taken as no spreading so great result. The specialist though has told me I'm triple negative, grade 3 but he cleared all cancer. I will have to do chemo and radio though! I'm a little overwhelmed and unsure about the treatment.

I've read stories about chemo and frankly it just makes me scared. I have 3 little girls and telling them about this to this point has been ok however how do you tell your kids that you've lost your hair and so sick from treatment because it is doing you good when I don't look sick now? Does this make sense?

Love to hear what others say with a similar story. I feel blessed it hasn't spread and I know I have to have chemo due to the risk of recurrence but it's just a lot to take in over the last 2 weeks!

Also has anyone had any involvement with getting their bloods taken to see what needs building up in the immune system before treatment, or suggest Vitamin C tablets other alternate therapies? Does your oncologist discuss this or do I go back to my GP?

I know a lot of questions but would love to hear.

Samantha x

deanne · Answer

Firstly I'm very happy that it has not spread to your lymph nodes. I think Tash has given you excellent advice about how to handle telling your children. They will take their cue from you, so being honest but keeping it simple is good. I think this advice applies to all families but naturally those of us with older children or adult children will be able to give more complicated info.

Chemo is scarey at first and certainly not easy, but it is usually not as bad as you imagine. I was on a 3 week cycle and found that I had one bad week (feeling like I had the flu), one week where I felt ok but knew my immune system was low, and then one normal week where I could prepare for the next round. You will be amazed at how well you cope but it is a good idea to accept all offers of help. You will appreciate things like meals cooked and offers to help with running the kids around.

With regard to blood tests to check vitamin levels etc.this is best done after chemo. Most oncologists do not seem to go into this and some supplements can interfere with how chemo works so get this part of treatment over first.
I finished my treatment 7 months ago and have just had my GP check my levels of iron, Vit B, Vit D etc. it makes sense to me to try and have my immune system functioning at its best. If you have a good GP (it took me a while to find one who seemed to know his stuff) this might be the best way to go once you finish treatment.

Wishing you all the best. Take care. Deanne xxx

liztay82 · Answer

Hey I was just straight up with my older boys who are 6 and 10 I also have a 2 yr old I just told them that the medican I will be receiving will make my hair fall out and I might get sick but so far no sickness I got a wig which I wear when I'm out n about and go bald or beanies at home I did have my 10 yr old ask if I was dieing so I was straight up tellin him no this medican is killing the nasty cells which can't be seen ( bone n ct scan clear) he was ok plus I also asked my oncologist aswell for my oldest boy he reassured me that women with my type life Healthlyi lives the older boys gave taken it well they loved cutting my hair my partner shaved it  I had ac chemo first up by memory I think cycle 3 and cycle 4 I had to inject myself (nurse did I couldn't do it) as my white cells went low I'm now onto herception and another one which I started today I asked today if I could take multivitamin just to help they said I could . This cycle I have bloods next week before treatment to check levels I'm also on tablets to keep my blood pressure down I also get heart ultrasounds because I have a murmer so they keep a eye on that for me. Good luck with ure treatments

samantha_jane · Answer

Thank you so much Mia, I appreciate your reply, and I love reading all of the different stories. It makes it feel mor normal and real and that while a journey and a long one that us women can climb the mountain. I think I need that right now.

Just back from the oncologist and she has given me two different treatment plans, which I can mull over for the next few days. This being young, whilst quite a compliment, and the triple negative verdict seems to be the reason for them wanting me to bit hit hard by the chemo. I am just so unsure?

Thanks though for your words of wisdom. Good luck with your continued journey.

Sam x

hikerbabe · Answer

Hi Samantha,
my boys are 12 and 14 so may be a little older than yours. My husband and I have been very honest with telling them what is going on, however this has been done with a huge dose of humour. Not to belittle what I am going through but to try to make it easier for them to understand.
Prior to my mastectomy I was an 18DD so the boys referred to my boobs as my 'portable head pillows'! They were always a convenient pillow when they needed to have a nap when they were little! They now tell me that unfortunately one of them has been stuck with a pin and been deflated! Gotta love kids! As I had a skin sparring and nipple conserving mastectomy I do still have something there on my left side, so they really thinks it looks like a deflated baloon!
I would think that depending on age you will have to have some serious talks with them, however try to keep it simple but ultimately honest. I think that there are some great books out there that help in explaining cancer to younger children as well!
All the best
Therese

hikerbabe · Answer

Hi Samantha,
my boys are 12 and 14 so may be a little older than yours. My husband and I have been very honest with telling them what is going on, however this has been done with a huge dose of humour. Not to belittle what I am going through but to try to make it easier for them to understand.
Prior to my mastectomy I was an 18DD so the boys referred to my boobs as my 'portable head pillows'! They were always a convenient pillow when they needed to have a nap when they were little! They now tell me that unfortunately one of them has been stuck with a pin and been deflated! Gotta love kids! As I had a skin sparring and nipple conserving mastectomy I do still have something there on my left side, so they really thinks it looks like a deflated baloon!
I would think that depending on age you will have to have some serious talks with them, however try to keep it simple but ultimately honest. I think that there are some great books out there that help in explaining cancer to younger children as well!
All the best
Therese

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