cancer treatments, brain fog and worsening ADHD

@Sue_w

Oh no!  I just realised I did a "for a reason" statement!  Ignore that bit.  😉

Hi @Sue_w

I'm post surgery and progressing through chemo.

In a past time, my doctor has hinted at having ADD but I told them I wasn't taking any more diagnoses.  😂.

I have medication for other reasons that helps with ADD.  Unfortunately I had to stop this for the time being.  Serotonin syndrome and all.

I find there is a definite fog, which to me feels like it's a combination of physical and mental stress, and the cognitive load of coming to terms with everything. 

Any scrap of forward planning that I did have is gone.  People trying to help me ask what's on tomorrow (kids pick up etc) and, without my calendar, it's a complete blank - not even a shadow of an idea.

I have to quadruple check anything I put in my calendar, to check that I've written it right.

I can't handle multiple issues at once right now.  And I know that anything that isn't written down is forgotten.

The positives are that it's liberating and peaceful living in "the now" on steroids.

And the tools and structures to manage ADD are very useful for navigating chemo fog.  Maybe life was preparing us for this moment?  😂

Best wishes.  🤗

Hi @Julez1958
I have always had more than a few ADHD (inattentive type) traits and have masked most of them with  strategies that worked quite well to cope with some of the more difficult aspects of it. Since treatment for BC I have found that I am having more difficulties, old strategies are not working well. I'm currently seeing a therapist and undergoing assessment for ADHD. (I don't have the final word yet but she assures me that, yep, I do have it).

There are some good aspects to ADHD, I love the creative side, the flow of ideas when you are really focused in on something, the feeling like your mind is buzzing with ideas and the ability to think laterally, connecting seemingly random things. 

I feel that the more difficult side of ADHD has increased exponentially, while my ability to be creative (writing and art) has almost disappeared. I know it sounds crazy, but that upsets me more than the loss of my breast. 

Physically everything has healed well. There have been and still are some very unpleasant physical side effects, but  I can deal with those, this on the other hand, has really thrown me.

I am grateful I am alive and I know that many have it so much worse but I can't help feeling like another part of me is missing. I feel dimmed own and overwhelmed at the same time...  

Hi @Sue_w
I don’t have ADHD but do believe that as well as “ chemo brain “ ( cognitive impacts of the drugs in chemo) there is also the psychological impact of a cancer diagnosis that can affect you to varying degrees.
When I was diagnosed I didn’t have chemo but I still forgot things and my behaviour changed in other ways too -  I think it was because of the shock and anxiety of it all .
Are you under the care of a counsellor or psychologist ?