Scared, confused and need advice

Hi Tilly14,

First, we are here with you, your fellow travellers on this webpage.

You are not as alone as you feel you are, there is help and support for yourself and your daughter, including all of us on this website. And the cancer organisiations have counselling and other assistance for your daughter as well. If you tell me which city you live in, I will hunt out all the info I can.

Second, when you are tired, sick, scared and the rug has just been pulled out from under your feet, things always look bad and feel much worse than they really are.  And this is also why you will naturally underestimate what you can cope with and survive at the moment.

i know you are dealing with really frightening stuff, but  so you are currently more vulnerable and more emotionally reactive than you generally are, so you will find it easier to believe in yourself, and that you can get through your treatment once you start to get back on your feet again. 

Third, sometimes knowing your family really needs you and that you cannot actually fit dying into the plans can be a powerful incentive to push through difficult times and to find the determination to persist and can help you survive better. To find the faith against all odds to know that you will get through this. I have a friend whose liver packed in when his wife had left him and he was raising two very young children on his own. His doctor told him to see his lawyer, but he knew he had to be there for his kids, and twenty years later he is still going strong. 

When you get a little energy back, you will find it much more possible to grit your teeth and hold true, and easier to push the despair and hopelessness away. The fact that it is really hard to do now is not because things really are hopeless, just that you are so vulnerable and tired etc. 

best wishes