Advice on ceasing treatment
Hi everyone I hope someone can help me, this journey is horrible. My mum was successfully treated for breast cancer 9 years ago. Last year it returned with aggression. It attacked her intest...
Forum Discussion
I don't know if I count as the newly diagnosed still (5 December 2017 and still in active treatment) and don't want to make this thread about dissension but I can understand both points. I do believe that the title of this makes it obvious what it's about and gives the opportunity for those who don't want to read it, to avoid the issue. That said, of course it's confronting. And terrifying. On the other hand, it is what it is and no amount of "ostrich behaviour" is going to make it go away. I try to be optimistic but I know the reality is that I do not know if this bastard of a thing is going to come back. I think it was @zoffiel who said that Australians don't deal with death. I'm in the seemingly unusual position amongst my friends, in that I have had death up close and personal throughout my life, starting from when I was a child. I know that it happens. And I know the impact it has on those who are left behind. Having lived it, I am so scared of leaving my kids too early. Although, I lost my Mum when I was 35 and that's still too bloody early.
But to get back to the point, I have read the posts on this discussion. Some I cannot seem to focus on as my eyes just seem to keep sliding over the words, but I know I will go back to this when I get my head into a better space. When you try to find out information about progression and real life expectancy, the presentation of it is often meaningless or so impersonal as to be brutal. The 5 year thing is important in the first instance, I guess, but after that, what does it really mean? Yes, I want 5 years but what about 10, 20, 30? It's as valuable to have discussions like this about the reality for those who face the issues surrounding end of life, quality of life, and decisions to cease treatment as it is to have the other discussions and I don't think they should be hidden away in private groups only. The whole point of this network is about connection and validation. I have a recollection from earlier in the year that one of the women who was involved in the start of this network, herself died from the disease. Sensitivity in titling any such discussions (as show with this one) is to be hoped for but I think they need to be as public as the others.
@Mellyb I hope your Mum was able to come to a decision that she can cope with and my thoughts are with you and her, and the rest of your family.
But to get back to the point, I have read the posts on this discussion. Some I cannot seem to focus on as my eyes just seem to keep sliding over the words, but I know I will go back to this when I get my head into a better space. When you try to find out information about progression and real life expectancy, the presentation of it is often meaningless or so impersonal as to be brutal. The 5 year thing is important in the first instance, I guess, but after that, what does it really mean? Yes, I want 5 years but what about 10, 20, 30? It's as valuable to have discussions like this about the reality for those who face the issues surrounding end of life, quality of life, and decisions to cease treatment as it is to have the other discussions and I don't think they should be hidden away in private groups only. The whole point of this network is about connection and validation. I have a recollection from earlier in the year that one of the women who was involved in the start of this network, herself died from the disease. Sensitivity in titling any such discussions (as show with this one) is to be hoped for but I think they need to be as public as the others.
@Mellyb I hope your Mum was able to come to a decision that she can cope with and my thoughts are with you and her, and the rest of your family.