Mental health.. News story triggered a panic attack

When I discussed my pathology with my breast surgeon after a mastectomy, he used a Cambridge formula to estimate my chances of reaching five years survival were 76%. I felt very good about that. I had a well developed tumour, one malignant lymph node but I still had a three out of four chance of getting through. As they say, there are lies, damned lies and statistics. Statistics aren’t lies, but they are open to
interpretation and therefore not gospel. My view was that 76% was realistic - I was not out of the woods but I danced a couple of steps, it might have been much worse! Eight very happy and exciting years on, I still feel the same. I’ve been in the position (nothing to do with cancer) of being the one in 10,000 where something goes wrong. All fixed, happy ending. But it can happen. 99% survival would gladden us all, but not the ones who fall into the 1% group! Which, for thousands of cases, is quite a lot of people. The choice is yours, to see a one in four chance as threatening and depressing or a three out of four chance as being empowering and encouraging. It’s up to you, but I know which one makes your life happier and more fulfilling. Please keep up the psychiatrist, it can be really helpful as cancer is good at pulling the confidence rug from under your feet. Best wishes for a speedy return to feeling more optimistic. 

Firstly, as someone whose anxiety manifests in panic attacks I just want to give you a big virtual hug. They are just so awful and I hope you're not too zonked from it now.

I am sure your psychologist will be able to work through some things with you but I will share some of what has worked for me. Remember though, we are all different though so you will need to find what is best for you.

In addition to working through some of the 'why' of my anxiety with a psychologist, I also needed to deal with some more practical things to help cope during a panic attack and prevent future ones. To do this, I had to learn a bit about the physiological side of anxiety and panic attacks (through info from my psych and my own reading).

Firstly, ground zero, during a panic attack. If someone tells me to "take deep breaths" I'll tell them to take a long walk off a short pier. This makes me worse! However, there is a reason why there are so many old movies showing someone breathing into a paper bag. When we hyperventilate, our oxygen/other stuff mix gets out of balance, making us feel dizzy etc. So by rebreathing our own air for 5-10 breathes we restore this and absorb more or some specific something (sorry, long time ago I read about this). You don't need a bag, cup your hands over your mouth and take 5-10 breaths. Other things that help me are sudden colt temperature (go outside, stand at the open fridge, cold face washer, etc), touching another person's skin or calling someone (so I know I am real/not dreaming) and banging on a table or such (uses up pumping adrenalin).

Once I got used to knowing when a panic attack was coming, I could usually use one of these things to prevent it at the last minute.

The bigger thing has been to make big attitude and lifestyle changes to reduce my "baseline stress". This includes saying no to things, not trying to be superwoman and allowing myself to be lazy at times. When your baseline stress is high, it doesn't take much to tip over into panic levels. It also means that during unavoidable times of stress, like moving house, a work deadline or, yay, dealing with cancer, I know I need to back off even further on all the other stuff and be alert that I'm at panic attack risk/have supports in place.

I think what you're feeling is completely normal. I have "the breast cancer you would want to get if you had to have breast cancer" and I can't see myself not freaking out for quite some time yet. I can't even imagine how hard it must be for you. Don't ever feel guilty for how you are feeling or reacting, we are only human!

I do have one phrase though that I like to share. When my friend told it to me, as it worked for them, I looked at them like they thought I was stupid. It just felt too simple. She said, when you find yourself starting to worry (or despair, or stress, etc) about something ask yourself, "is me worrying (or despairing, or stressing, etc) about this actually going to change the outcome?". Then, as the answer is always "no", you can let the worry go. Just allow it to leave.

Not as in shove the feelings down and ignore them. Just observe them, understand that your feelings are valid, but don't hold them close and let them rule.

I'm working really (REALLY!!!) hard at practising what I preach at the moment. None of this is easy, but hopefully things can get a little bit easier for you.

Sending you a virtual hug!
It's a little confronting when reports on the news knock you around. 
Recently here in Melbourne the newspaper headline about breast implants and what to look for.  I am well aware and well versed, thanks to my Specialist however it does rattle the nerves.
The appointment with a Psychologist will hopefully give you some coping mechanisms and recognising triggers so you can cope and be one of the many triple negative survivors!
Take care

Sending you hugs xxx

@Afraser
Thank you for your wise words once again
75% sounds better but = 1 in 4
it just upset me to see it phrased that way
my husband said the news will always go for the shock factor

I try and not google but even TV can trigger panic attacks and remind us of cancer :(

@StrongCoffee thank you for you advice
Being someone who has dealt with anxiety and depression for all my life
finding tools to control panic has never been more necessary then now
i will definitely give you suggestions ago 😃


@iserbrown and @Cath62  thank you for the hug xx

I think we all have those days and certainly not something to apologise for or feel bad that you feel this way. I try to get out for a walk in nature most days, hug my dog..... however some days I realise nothing will get my thoughts on to the positive and just have to let it happen. As morbit as it sounds sometimes I reflect on my life and am happy with everything I have already achieved- 3 beautiful teenage boys, I've travelled, I've worked as a teacher which I love, happily married....... and just think whatever happens this has been a good life MOSTLY!!! Sending love.

@MBHPJ 
what a wonderful outlook you have
I walk in nature everyday with my four legged friend 
and I too think about the wonderful things in life I have received 
my husband is amazing and my best friend 

somedays just get the better of us I guess 
sometimes I got stuck on a negative thought pattern loop but it’s lovely to be able to speak to the wonderful people on here who understand what you’re going through xx

Your husband is 100% correct re the media! Happy stories don’t sell papers or advertising time! You are not long on this particular little adventure - forgive me for that word, I got very cross (but hid it) when a pathologist used it, but in time I changed my mind. Some adventures are scary, some have extremely unpleasant moments. It’s an adventure because it’s new, you’ve never done it before, you don’t know if you can or how it will turn out. Years from now, you’ll rattle off stats with the best of us, memories won’t come unbidden and you’ll find your own level of calm. But it’s a scary ride at first so don’t blame yourself for perfectly natural feelings. Best wishes. 

Statements like those in the news story can make the bottom drop out of your world - doesn't matter how grounded you are.  @StrongCoffees statement about whether worrying is going to change things is so true.  It's not going to make it go away, take the anger or the sadness from you, but reflecting on it when you have your breath back makes you realise that there is only one way and that is forward.  I don't know what my future is going to look like.  I'm hoping that it is long and relatively healthy and I am doing the best I can to help that.  I want to be on the right side of the stats but in the end I only have so much control of it.  

Hi sending virtual hugs 😊
someone once said “ statistics are like a lamppost to a drunk , more useful for leaning on than illumination”.
I agree with what has been said above - you can treat statistics as a positive or a negative - I like to look at the positive - a 75 percent chance of survival is a good thing , I don’t turn it around and think of “ what if I am in the 25 percent”.
you can’t control the outcome , so just enjoy life.
However , if stuff is getting you down , by all means get professional help from a psychologist , I saw one briefly and her best advice was “ it’s ok to cry”.
 So  I don’t even apologise  for random and / or inappropriate bouts of crying now.