The year my life paused...

Hi Carol,

So sorry this has happened to you too but I think you are so accurate with your "the year my life paused ..." label. That is exactly how it felt for me too. I felt as though my life paused while everything around me almost sped up. The speed that everything happened meant that you just don't have time to really take it in. You just get through one thing after another.

I have also heard people describe it as retreating into a cocoon which is how it felt for me. Just look after yourself, let others help (it actually helps them because they feel so helpless watching on otherwise) and you will be surprised at how quickly the time will pass. Make the most of the good days and know that the bad ones will pass.

I am now almost 3 years down the track and life is different but mostly pretty good. This is a terrific place to connect with others who will understand your feelings during this time. Keep in touch. Deanne xxx

I should rephrase that, low blood count is 10 days after chemo and is best to have visitors limited for a week or so then until you are getting back to normal.

I found my husband sort of blabbed it to neighbours as he needed to have some consoling and they have been great support for us both.

Hi Carol,

I found it really hard to tell people when I was first diagnosed.  It's not that I didn't want them to know I just couldn't seem to say it out loud.  I am now just out the other end of the whirlwind, so just know you will make it out the other end too.  Emma Xx

I'm 4 years post diagnosis and honestly I cannot believe where that time went. I survived and came out the end it all seems so much at the time, the only advice I can give to you is rest and take the offer of help. I was a stubborn buger and tried to be superwoman and I think that alone was exhausting. I've learnt along the way now with other unfortunate illnesses blood cancer that now bestow me is to take it easy. The only problem is my husband who was so used to super woman is now saying what's wrong with you as I'm actualy doing what I'm told by my oncoligist.  Life is funny good luck 

Thanks to everyone for the support it really helps to know I'm not alone with my feelings and attitude.

Love and luck to you all xox

I'm a leftie too, diagnosed Oct, surgery Nov and Dec, first chemo Jan, and about to have my 2nd chemo the end of this week.

You can tell or not tell whoever you like but if they are sorts likely to be dropping in to your place while you are on chemo you might like to limit them to the times when your white cells are not at their lowest, about 10 days after each dose. You need to stay healthy and not catch any bugs going around.

I have day by day reports on my blog how my chemo reacted with me. I had not really any idea and nor do each of us until its given to our bodies. So far so good for me. :)

Hi Carol,

While it's not good you have had to join us here, It IS a good place to be. Plenty of moral support, shared experiences and a "safe" place to have a whine without judgement!

I was diagnosed Christmas Eve! and a blink of an eye saw January disappear in a flurry of tests, surgery,scans and consults...The worst part I think is the waiting...waiting for results, surgery and appointments

Can't give you advice on how you should be feeling, we are all different and handle things in our own way, but if you don't feel like having visitors, say so.....if you want to scream,, scream, if you want to cry, cry. 

I think your brain automatically places you in a fog, so you can cope with all of the emotions and the information you are trying to make sense of.

Write everything down, ask lots of questions, then ask some more. Log in regularly and know, although we don't know each other personally, we are united in the march to stamp out BC and we are here to support each other.

Good Luck with the rest of your treatment.

Love and light for easy recovery and beautiful days..

-Tracy Xx

stay strong|breathe|believe

Hi Carol and welcome.... yes it can be shocking to hear the words you have BC.... for me I was just dumbfounded like you I said no way you have the wrong person.... but here I am 4 months later having chemo lost my hair but life goes on. You will be fine, breathe be strong (yes I know easier said than done) but do we really have any choice?  I know what you mean about staying home. For the first time today I put my bandanna on and took my daughter to school and even went to the shops and bought some groceries, yes people were looking but held my head up high and at the end of the day it is what it is, I have cancer and this is my look for now!

Chriss xx

Hi Carol,

yes it is a whirlwind that can take some time to adjust now and after treatment,i was diagnosed almost 3 years ago, im back at work now and embracing a new normal. Its a real shock and everyone reacts differently. my advice to you would be to be good to yourself many women don't really know how to put themselves first, this is the time to do that, rest when you need to and don't feel guilty, say no if you need to and don't feel guilty, keeping a journal helped me especially when i was having treatment because you can't really think clearly so writing stuff down helps and also helps to remember things as you will be seeing lots of Dr's, etc and have lots of appointments and its really hard to remember all the information. We all are here to support you and having BCNA to get resources, information and support is invaluable. Stay strong, take each day as it comes - don't think too far ahead and ask for help.

thinking of you

Take care

Di

Hi Carol, DITTO!!! Jan 8th.. the day i was diagnosed with breast cancer! I'm 3 sleeps away from my surgery (wide local excision with removal of sentinel nodes)  I get what you mean about running into people. I work for a gp, and I was diagnosed while i was on holidays. My first day back was basically my boss getting me into a surgeon and all the while the patients are asking me how my christmas was... I'd like to respond by saying shit thank you, and yours? LOL

I find that I tell those I want to know, and figure the grapevine will take care of the rest. A friend who is a nurse sent me a lovely message after we'd caught up and i filled her in, asking what she should say, as i'm the third person to tell her that they have bc. I told her that when people say to me, "i'm so sorry" I immediately feel the need to make them feel better. I would rather they say, "well that sucks"  But thats just me.  I also decided that i would make a public journal on facebook. I've been involved with fundraising for 4 years for Girls Night in and such, so this was another way to get the word out there to the ladies to be vigilant with their health. I also get my female friends young and my age (i'm 50) to feel the lump so they see what its like, and understande how easily i nearly dismissed it (its quite small) Again, that me and how i'm handling my journey. 

Find what works for you, what you're comfortable with. Anyone who doesnt like it can take a flying leap.

Good luck with your journey. We're all here for you.