Tears & Butterflies in the Stomach since New Primary Diagnosis

Hi Vinn2016,

Thanks so much for sharing your experience. It really is reassuring to know that these crazy emotional ups & downs are a normal part of the journey, especially 2nd time around.  Hearing your story has really put things into perspective for me.

Like yourself I am otherwise well & lead a very healthy lifestyle - my junk food loving teen kids & husband love poking fun my 'healthy' food choices!  

So I can totally relate to feeling betrayed by my own body too. Crazy as it sounds I guess I also felt a bit let down by specialist after being given the initial all clear. Up until then I had 100% confidence in everything he told me about my excellent recovery & prognosis. 

All the best with your post surgery results, recovery & radiation & thankyou for reaching out - it is greatly appreciated :)

Take Care 

Mel xxxx

Hi Kath, 

Thankyou so much for your thoughtful reply & recommendations about where to seek support :) 

I also appreciate you clarifying that a new primary is not a recurrence. I have edited my post & removed the incorrect terminology so as not confuse others!  xx

I'm hearing you. What a bugger. totally understand what you are going through.

In 2012 I was diagnosed with DCIS (in over 50% of my milk ducts) in my left boob. opted for mastectomy, 3 lymph nodes removed  and reconstruction over lumpectomy and radiation therapy. Told first option would alleviate any chance of getting cancer in that breast ever again. In March this year I felt 2 hard large lumps in my left breast which turned out to be invasive stage 2 cancer and it was in the lymph nodes as well plus more DCIS. I can tell you I was beside myself. How the frick did this happen I was asking everyone. Could not stop crying for ages plus totally angry as I felt betrayed by everyone involved including my own body and husband. I have always be fit and healthy. Since my first diagnosis started taking Turmeric, drinking alkaline water and juicing (went out and bought a cold pressed juicer) 

 This time I've had an operation to remove the cancer and 7 lymph nodes, Finished chemo last month, as I type I am sitting in hospital as I just had surgery for the second time this morning to remove more of the area where the cancer was and next month I look forward to 5/5 weeks of radiation therapy.

Feel angry, upset and totally P***** off, you deserve that right to be those things. Need someone to talk to, I'm here to listen.

All the best, stay strong and look after yourself.

A new primary breast cancer I don't  believe is  classed as a recurrence in the other breast. It is not failed treatment,  I guess we are at risk  of this as what enabled us to get breast cancer in the 1st place theoretically could happen again to any of us. (Just think of skin cancer  in different areas)

I would think your reaction is very normal. Knowing what is ahead is stressful...no matter what the treatment it is still hard work. We also have the mind games going on...what if it happens again? These are questions worth exploring and discussing with your surgeon. Denying fears and bottling up emotion isn't  healthy and having a good cry and discussing these feelings is good. These feelibgs will pass once treatment starts. You may never feel as confident as you once did of  being cancer free. But you will again feel comfortable and be able to move on.

Don't  forget the cancer council has a counselor phone service and you could call and have a chat anytime you feel the need if you don't have somebody locally you feel you can do this with.

Here's  to smooth sailing treatment for you. Take care. Kath x

Melhay.....Sorry to hear of a second diagnosis :(

Your reaction is what I'd expect to be normal, like you said, you beat it the first time, so how dare it show it's face again!

Allow yourself to be angry....to cry....scream ....just like the first time....but please make sure you don't slide down that cliff face into the abyss and not resurface.....seek help if it gets to dark! Surround yourself with those who will love and support you....draw strength from their love and support.....Youve got this! you did it once and you CAN do it again!

Remember we are here too!

Xx