Forum Discussion

jolittle's avatar
jolittle
Member
11 years ago

Newly Diagnosed with young baby

Hi, Ive never posted online before but reading other people's posts have helped me. I had a baby 3 monhts ago and was diagnosed in the last week with stage 2 breast cancer.

I'd gone to have the same lump looked at a  year before but the ultrasound gave me the all clear. After finishing breastfeeding the lump was still there and bam - here I am.  

I feel like i'm on a rollercoaster but today is definitely a down day. I've had positive results in that is doesn't seem to have spread anywhere else, but I keep letting my mind go to places it shouldn't. I have a nother young son - and every time i look at my babies my heart breaks.

I will start chemo soon to shrink the tumour (4cm), then surgery and radiaiton.  I guess I just want to know that these feelings will die down at some stage and I will begin to come to terms with all of this. 

9 Replies

  • Bearteggie's avatar
    Bearteggie
    Member
    11 years ago

    I am so sorry Christy to hear you too have been diagnosed with BC and have a little baby and young children to look after. 

    You sound very brave and keeping a level head about all this.  You are right to just concentrate on your long term health and worrying won't help that at all.  In the beginning it is a huge shock and everything is a blur but with your already positive attitude I am sure you will settle down and come to terms with it.

    You will have good days and some not so good-  just go with it and before you know you will be having more good days than not.   Keep strong for your precious children and yourself.

    Very big hugs

     

    Joy xx 

  • ChristyK's avatar
    ChristyK
    Member
    11 years ago

    Hi there,

    I can relate to what you are feeling right now. I have a little bub, she is 17 weeks old (plus an almost 8 year old and a 6 year old). I was diagnosed with bc 2 and half weeks ago after a biopsy. I had a cyst which I found days before giving birth in January - looked like a 'simple cyst' - so nothing to worry about. After testing the fluid from the cyst - it came back a bit funny. we could then see a dark patch on the side of the cyst, from a biopsy it came back as a bc.

    I have had to quickly wean my little one (so not ready for that!! We were both very happy breastfeeding!), I then had surgery on Thursday to remove the lump and take 3 lymph nodes for testing. 

    Try and keep positive although it is hard when you have treatment in front on you. I have just been trying to focus on my long term health. I have to get well to be around for my kids. Even though i am at the initial stage of this I feel like my family is already missing out on me. They need me!!

    Try and stay positive and dont think of everything at once...it is far to overwhelming. I am the same as you though, I wonder if I will ever come to terms with this. Its all a bit of a blur at the moment. xx

  • ChristyK's avatar
    ChristyK
    Member
    11 years ago

    Hi there,

    I can relate to what you are feeling right now. I have a little bub, she is 17 weeks old (plus an almost 8 year old and a 6 year old). I was diagnosed with bc 2 and half weeks ago after a biopsy. I had a cyst which I found days before giving birth in January - looked like a 'simple cyst' - so nothing to worry about. After testing the fluid from the cyst - it came back a bit funny. we could then see a dark patch on the side of the cyst, from a biopsy it came back as a bc.

    I have had to quickly wean my little one (so not ready for that!! We were both very happy breastfeeding!), I then had surgery on Thursday to remove the lump and take 3 lymph nodes for testing. 

    Try and keep positive although it is hard when you have treatment in front on you. I have just been trying to focus on my long term health. I have to get well to be around for my kids. Even though i am at the initial stage of this I feel like my family is already missing out on me. They need me!!

    Try and stay positive and dont think of everything at once...it is far to overwhelming. I am the same as you though, I wonder if I will ever come to terms with this. Its all a bit of a blur at the moment. xx

  • jolittle's avatar
    jolittle
    Member
    11 years ago

    Thank you ladies - all of the above have helped me and I'm sure I will get a lot of use out of this site. xx

  • Bearteggie's avatar
    Bearteggie
    Member
    11 years ago

    Hi and welcome to BCNA.  I am so sorry that you find yourself in this situation and can't imagine how hard it would be for you just having had your little baby 3 months ago.  I completely understand though how your mind goes to very dark places and how your heart breaks when you look at your little ones.  I think in the beginning we all felt this when we looked at our loved ones grappling with our news. 

    It is vitally important that you try to take one day at a time and live in the moment.  You don't want to be terrorizing yourself with imaginings that will only rob you of happiness and joy with your children.   Some days it is harder than others but if you are finding you are not coping emotionally please seek the help of a psychologist.  It really does help to have someone to talk to about our fears and concerns without being judged or told to cheer up. 

    Once you start your chemo you will settle into the process and find that "anticipation is worse than participation".  I am sure too than once you know that lump is shrinking you are going to feel a whole lot more positive.  Great news that it didn't spread to your nodes. 

    I have just finished my chemo three weeks ago and have now had two rounds of radiation.  Looking back on the chemo it was no walk in the park but we make it through and already it is becoming a blur.  The fatigue for me was the most frustrating and in your case ask and accept all the help you can.

    Please stay connected to this forum and ask as many questions as you need to. 

    Big hugs to you.

    Love

    Joy xx 

  • Hazel_M's avatar
    Hazel_M
    Member
    11 years ago

    Sorry to hear that you have been diagnosed, this network will be a big help to you. I am nearly through my treatment and while it wasn't a picnic, it's doable and as Robyn said, most breast cancer is treatable. I didn't have any little children so I really feel for you, I hope you have family and friends to help and if they ask to help make sure you take them up on their offers. Sending big hugs to you, all the best, 

    Hazel xx

  • Robyn_W's avatar
    Robyn_W
    Member
    11 years ago
    Welcome to the online network!I I cannot imagine how hard it must be to have a 3 month old baby,and be diagnosed.Just having a baby of that age is difficult enough.I am 59,so obviously a lot older than you,but I can tell you Jo,that it does get a lot easier.Firstly,try to keep in mind,that BC these days,is very,very treatable,and most ladies go on to lead long,healthy lives.Their breast cancer is just a bump in the road:) The fact that yours hasn't spread,is a VERY good thing( mine was the same) so even though treatment isn't going to be the best thing that you have done in your life,it is definitely something that you can do.The best piece of advice,and so simple,is to take things one day at a time.Dont look ahead,because it is usually not the way it will be.If you have people that are offering to help,make sure you take the help,as it will make things a lot easier.Your emotions will settle down,and as you start your treatment,you will find that you get into a sort of routine with it all.Whereabouts do you live Jo? Chemotherapy these days,is not the nightmare that it was many years ago.Even if you do have side effects,such as nausea,perhaps skin rashes etc.there are medications to take care of just about everything these days.I wish I could help you more,but please stay on this blog,because it is so helpful as you start your treatment.I am sure that other young Mums will respond to your post over the next few days,and you won't feel so alone.Keep smiling,and try to remember,that this is just a bump in the road.I was diagnosed last September.I had a mastectomy,then chemo,and now I take Tamoxifen.I feel pretty great now :)Sending you a big cyber hug xoxRobyn
  • Liztay82's avatar
    Liztay82
    Member
    11 years ago
    First of all welcome and sorry u are here but these ladies wonderful I had a lump removed 6 nodes positive and on chemo then radiation when I first found out back in feb I was like u scared sad when I looked at my boys but now I'm like nope I'm going to be positive once u have got all ure treatments worked out that's when I was like yeap I can do this I also take one of my closest friends to my chemo appointments we have a laugh it's easy said then done. Good luck with everything